Wedding Invitation Question

amother

OP ↓

Tue, Jan 23 2024, 12:02 pm

Ok.....not sure what to do

Chosson's parent are divorced.
His dad is helping financially a bit.
His mom isn't contributing at all

Where do we put their names on the invitation?

Also, what do we do with the return address? The whole point of it is to return to sender if necessary. Seems weird to even put both sides' addresses without a divorce involved. To put 3 return addresses on the back seems ridiculous!

What do people do with this situation?

Thank you!

peace2

Tue, Jan 23 2024, 12:03 pm

Parents' name on 2 separate lines
Mr. and Mrs. Moshe Klein
Mr. Yosef Cohen
Mrs. Esther Cohen
Invite you...

amother

Almond

Tue, Jan 23 2024, 12:03 pm

Why does contributing matter? In-laws are divorced. Names went like
Mr. And Mrs. Kallah parents
Mr. Chosson dad
Mrs. Chosson mom

Would like to invite you

Or names at the bottom but written out like that format

Chayalle ↓

Tue, Jan 23 2024, 12:05 pm

IMVHO the invitation itself should look as normal as possible. No need to announce issues to the rest of the world. Put both his parents on.

For address, put the person who will be responsible for any returned mail, return cards, and/or checks.

watergirl

Tue, Jan 23 2024, 12:06 pm

Why would you openly humiliate and shame a parent who is not contributing by leaving their name off an invitation?

Mr. & Mrs. Yonatan Schwartz
Mr. Avraham Cohen
Ms. Sara Cohen

Per the invitations person I used for my first wedding, it makes usps people crazy when I actually need to use the return address and there are multiples given. Put the address of the person who is the one actually dealing with RSVPs and the venue.

amother

↑ OP ↓

Tue, Jan 23 2024, 12:08 pm

Chayalle wrote:

Thanks! I've been getting lots of opinions on what to do....lol

For address, we're handling all the mail, etc...
Do we put all 3 names plus our address? Or just our name and address?

amother

↑ OP

Tue, Jan 23 2024, 12:10 pm

watergirl wrote:

Wasn't planning to leave them off or humiliate them....
Some people told me I should have our name at top and by chosson's name put "son of Mr. Cohen and Ms. Cohen"

Just trying to navigate it welll.....

↑ ShishKabob

Tue, Jan 23 2024, 12:12 pm

amother OP wrote:

Thanks! I've been getting lots of opinions on what to do....lol

For address, we're handling all the mail, etc...
Do we put all 3 names plus our address? Or just our name and address?

Nowadays many people opt to print two envelopes and just put one address on it. They do put all names on it though. It works better with the post office like that.

icedcoffee

Tue, Jan 23 2024, 12:15 pm

Put everyone's name exactly how watergirl and peace2 said. For the return address, pick one person who will handle the incoming RSVPs - the address is for practical purposes, not to make everyone feel included.

essie14

Wed, Jan 24 2024, 2:06 am

For the invitation
Mr and Mrs Avraham Cohen
Mr Chaim Goldberg
Ms Devora Goldberg
Invite you to share in the simcha....

The return address for the envelopes should be your name and address if you're dealing with the Rsvp's and checks

salt

Wed, Jan 24 2024, 2:17 am

Which of the chatan's parents are your coordinating with?
Ask them.
How would you like your names to appear?
What return address would you like on the invitation, or do you want us to deal with the rsvps?

amother

Papaya

Wed, Jan 24 2024, 2:35 am

essie14 wrote:

This is the correct answer

amother

Tan

Wed, Jan 24 2024, 2:59 am

I've only seen an invitation where the parents weren't religious set out in such a way that it was obvious that one parent was paying for he wedding.

amother

Skyblue

Wed, Jan 24 2024, 3:52 am

My sil's choson's parents are divorced and his mom goes by her maiden name
They asked his side and the end result is
X&Y Q
HJ
VD

↑ Chayalle

Wed, Jan 24 2024, 8:18 am

amother OP wrote:

Thanks! I've been getting lots of opinions on what to do....lol

For address, we're handling all the mail, etc...
Do we put all 3 names plus our address? Or just our name and address?

That's up to you. We had our address and mechutanim's address, and we found that all the invites that were returned in the mail came to us, because our name was on top - including our Chosson's side's invited.

On the return card envelopes, I would just put your address if you are handling the invite list/seating and the checks.