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-> Announcements & Mazel Tovs
-> Tehillim Needed
amother
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Mon, Jan 08 2024, 1:47 pm
Davening hard! Please stay strong!
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cbsp
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Sun, Jan 14 2024, 12:24 pm
amother OP wrote: | Little Birdie is 12 weeks old today ka”h!
They are BH weaning his oxygen down to 23%
Big “care conference” scheduled for Wednesday bezH, hoping to have more clarity about how soon he can have his bris based on the discussion at the upcoming meeting. Please keep davening! |
Mazal Tov on this milestone! We'll keep davening...
FWIW, I had no idea that a bris could have been done while my baby was still in the NICU (hence we only started asking shaylos after he was discharged)... Just mentioning that in case it's an option...
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amother
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Sun, Jan 14 2024, 12:32 pm
cbsp wrote: | Mazal Tov on this milestone! We'll keep davening...
FWIW, I had no idea that a bris could have been done while my baby was still in the NICU (hence we only started asking shaylos after he was discharged)... Just mentioning that in case it's an option... |
Thank you! We are definitely exploring that option, and our mohel might be able to come to the meeting as well. According to our baby’s primary attending, the main obstacle to having the bris done in the hospital is mostly bureaucratic at this point.
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TranquilityAndPeace
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Sun, Jan 14 2024, 2:52 pm
Davening for your little prince!!!!
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jflower
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Sun, Jan 14 2024, 3:35 pm
OP, wishing your baby a refuah shelaimah. Said tehillim and hope to hear good news very soon.
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amother
Smokey
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Mon, Jan 22 2024, 7:46 pm
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amother
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Mon, Jan 22 2024, 10:10 pm
continuing to daven hard for you, your entire family, including little Tinok ben Shira Yisraela... May Hashem personally grant your little miracle a complete refuah!
I have my oldest, who spent a while in the NICU when he was born, saying tehillim for your baby right now too.
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amother
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Mon, Jan 22 2024, 10:14 pm
Thank you all so much 💛💛💛
Is it crazy that I’m worried about whether he will have attachment issues from not being home with us for his first few/several months?
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amother
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Mon, Jan 22 2024, 10:17 pm
amother OP wrote: | Thank you all so much 💛💛💛
Is it crazy that I’m worried about whether he will have attachment issues from not being home with us for his first few/several months? |
First of all hugs. Ugh this is so hard on a mother.
Regarding attachment, the mental health world believes that healing attachment when a child is young is very easy/possible.
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amother
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Mon, Jan 22 2024, 10:38 pm
amother OP wrote: | Thank you all so much 💛💛💛
Is it crazy that I’m worried about whether he will have attachment issues from not being home with us for his first few/several months? |
OP, I'm sorry, having a baby in the NICU is so hard. I had similar thoughts and tried to reframe when my oldest was in the NICU - and I realized he was a very pampered baby. Despite the IV's and everything, he had amazing care. It's the sense of care and having needs met on time and with a soft voice and gentle touch and positive emotions that leaves babies feeling safe and good attachment can form.
OP, don't let the fear win. Remind yourself that you go and visit him. You talk to him and show you love him. He knows you. He feels the security. And remembers the same familiar voice and smell from when he was inside and when he was first born. He also has caring nurses taking care of his needs when you aren't available. He gets help breathing when he needs it. He gets help with intake if he needs it. He probably has someone with him nearly all the time, or at least watching him. Even during the night when everyone else is sleeping, the staff at the hospital are watching and will take care of everything right away.
My NICU babies were so pampered compared with the babies who were in the nursery or even the ones I was zoche to take home with me after 3 days. and I was able to sleep more, making me a healthier mommy. That time away and feeling split into a million pieces is beyond hard, there really are no words. But with His help this impossibly difficult and scary time shall pass and you should have your precious Tinok home soon, so you can snuggle all day and show him that you love him. But trust me, your baby knows. He feels secure and loved and cared for, and he knows you are his Mommy.
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amother
Floralwhite
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Mon, Jan 22 2024, 10:50 pm
amother OP wrote: | Thank you all so much 💛💛💛
Is it crazy that I’m worried about whether he will have attachment issues from not being home with us for his first few/several months? |
My preemie girl I believe had "attachment issues" when we took her home but we couldn't come in/hold her for 3 weeks bc she caught RSV (long story)... When we finally took her home the day before pesach last year, she refused to sleep in any bassinet-she had to be near me. And that made sense!! Poor girl😢. So she slept next to me for several weeks and then I slowly had her nap during the day a little in her bassinet.... She's now in a crib in her own room BH
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amother
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Mon, Jan 22 2024, 11:57 pm
amother Bergamot wrote: | OP, I'm sorry, having a baby in the NICU is so hard. I had similar thoughts and tried to reframe when my oldest was in the NICU - and I realized he was a very pampered baby. Despite the IV's and everything, he had amazing care. It's the sense of care and having needs met on time and with a soft voice and gentle touch and positive emotions that leaves babies feeling safe and good attachment can form.
OP, don't let the fear win. Remind yourself that you go and visit him. You talk to him and show you love him. He knows you. He feels the security. And remembers the same familiar voice and smell from when he was inside and when he was first born. He also has caring nurses taking care of his needs when you aren't available. He gets help breathing when he needs it. He gets help with intake if he needs it. He probably has someone with him nearly all the time, or at least watching him. Even during the night when everyone else is sleeping, the staff at the hospital are watching and will take care of everything right away.
My NICU babies were so pampered compared with the babies who were in the nursery or even the ones I was zoche to take home with me after 3 days. and I was able to sleep more, making me a healthier mommy. That time away and feeling split into a million pieces is beyond hard, there really are no words. But with His help this impossibly difficult and scary time shall pass and you should have your precious Tinok home soon, so you can snuggle all day and show him that you love him. But trust me, your baby knows. He feels secure and loved and cared for, and he knows you are his Mommy. |
Thank you so much. The way you explained this really resonates.
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amother
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Mon, Jan 22 2024, 11:58 pm
amother Floralwhite wrote: | My preemie girl I believe had "attachment issues" when we took her home but we couldn't come in/hold her for 3 weeks bc she caught RSV (long story)... When we finally took her home the day before pesach last year, she refused to sleep in any bassinet-she had to be near me. And that made sense!! Poor girl😢. So she slept next to me for several weeks and then I slowly had her nap during the day a little in her bassinet.... She's now in a crib in her own room BH |
That’s reassuring that your DD was able to adjust over time BH!
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amother
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Mon, Jan 22 2024, 11:59 pm
amother Oak wrote: | First of all hugs. Ugh this is so hard on a mother.
Regarding attachment, the mental health world believes that healing attachment when a child is young is very easy/possible. |
Thank you so much 💛💛💛
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amother
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Tue, Jan 23 2024, 9:59 am
Ladies please daven…we are now having issues with insurance. He was medically cleared for a bris but for liability reasons, the hospital doesn’t want to do it with a mohel on hospital property. We told them we are happy to sign liability waivers, but they as of now do not approve it. The doctors did give clearance for a brief “leave of absence,” meaning we could bring Little Birdie home, give him a bris, and then turn right around and go back to the hospital immediately thereafter. Now apparently the insurance is denying that option for whatever reason.
According to his primary doctor, the main issues with the bris are now bureaucratic; the reason he still needs to stay in the hospital for several more weeks has more to do with his feeding issues than anything else as long as his breathing, heart rate, etc stay stable. He’s not medically cleared to go home yet, but he is OK to have a bris (and of course the non jewish surgeons and urologist keep suggesting that they can do it…”the rabbi can say the prayer while we do the circumcision procedure in the OR”…We’re like no thanks).
Rahhhhhhhh.
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amother
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Tue, Jan 23 2024, 10:04 am
I had a nicu baby who was also cleared medically for a bris in the NICU but they did not allow the mohel to come since covid policies. It was so so hard as I felt like he needs his bris the moment he is medically able to have it.
I then came to the realization (with ravs help) that it wasn't yet the right time for him even though he was cleared medically since the hospital did not allow our mohel to come. "in the right time" means a lot of things and if your hands are tied then this is not the right time.
You sound like an amazing mom and person and your baby is lucky to have you.
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