How do you get your kids to HELP???

RedRuby ↓

Sun, May 25 2008, 5:39 pm

I'm looking for ideas / tips to get my kids to help. (ages 6 - 10)

I'm just frustrated with the general 'basics'...

Making their own beds, putting clothes in hampers, setting, clearing table, etc. They'll do it, if I nag enough, but I'm tired of hearing myself tell them what to do.

Plus, everyone can't stand a nag.
Sad

And then, after a while, they just tune you out....

Ideas? Suggestions??

Thank you!

NotInNJMommy

Sun, May 25 2008, 5:42 pm

Well, I was going to say "start 'em young..." ( I let ds (3 yrs) 'help' now...he gets mad if I don't...)

but since we're past that...I've heard of someone called the "HouseFairy" (housefairy.org) which is tips for getting kids to help around the house. I haven't looked into it much, bc my kids are still pretty little kah...

PS I just looked at it, and you have to pay money for the videos I guess...Also, it refers to things like "using Santa's influence..." So, yes, it's not Jewish. I thought there might be some free ideas on that site....

Ribbie Danzinger

Sun, May 25 2008, 6:48 pm

I have a points system that I use at certain times during the year (like before Pesach, during school vacations and Chanukah). I have made a list of the various chores there are to do around the house, also including homework, getting out of the house on time etc. taking care of younger siblings.

A few examples:

90 or more on a test - 30 points
Out of door by 7:55 - 50 points
clearing table - 20 points
helping with cooking - 10 points
brushing teeth - 20 points
etc etc.
(My favorite is: in bed by 8:30pm - 100 points! Wink

)

Every evening after supper, we sit down and read the list and every child tells me which things they did and we write down their score. At the end of the week, we count up each child's points and each gets extra pocket money according to the number of points they got.
Even though I only give them 10 agurot for every 50 points, it really does help to motivate them without all the arguments and complaints (why complain that you're doing the most work, when you get the most points for it?) On Fridays we sometimes have double points.
I find that after a time of following this system, nobody can really follow it any more and I stop until another opportune moment arises. Nonetheless, I think it I can see its long-term effects, even when we are not following it.
My children are 2.5 to 14. I find it works best between 6-12 years.