Swimming in. Camp | Imamother

amother

OP ↓

Mon, Jul 04 2022, 9:22 pm

My dd age 7 cried today in camp after swimming because there were no bathrooms to change in. Camp director told her she should change in tznius way but dd says no cause its too hard and everyone could see. Director called me to tell me I need to speak to dd about this cause it's an important life skill and there won't airways be bathrooms to change in. I tried to speak to dd but she cried that shes never going swimming at camp again. I told her that 1 of the counselors can hold up a towel for her but she cried that everyone can see her undressed if she does that. Im not sure best way to handle this. What do you guys think?

ra_mom ↓

Mon, Jul 04 2022, 9:29 pm

I would validate that it's super uncomfortable. Sit with her in that feeling.
Once she's secure in the knowledge that you understand her because you don't like to get dressed in public without a bathroom either, practice with her and show her how you do it. Still wearing the bathing suit, put on a skirt. Then put tee over your head but not in the sleeves, and while hands are underneath pull down the bathing suit until the waist. Then put on the tee completely. Bathing quit can then be pulled off from underneath skirt.

amother

↑ OP ↓

Mon, Jul 04 2022, 9:33 pm

[quote="ra_mom"]I would validate that it's super uncomfortable. Sit with her in that feeling.
Once she's secure in the knowledge that you understand her because you don't like to get dressed in public without a bathroom either, practice with her and show her how you do it. Still wearing the bathing suit, put on a skirt. Then put tee over your head but not in the sleeves, and while hands are underneath pull down the bathing suit until the waist. Then put on the tee completely. Bathing quit can then be pulled off from underneath skirt.[/quote

She has to wear a tznius bathing suit!!! I don't even know how you get dressed in a tznius way while wearing a tznuis bathing suit dress!

amother

↑ OP ↓

Mon, Jul 04 2022, 9:46 pm

ra_mom wrote:

Can you explain what it looks like and how it's worn? Is it like a skirted short sleeved leotard?

Its a dress with pants under it. Pants are not attached. Dress is long sleeves and below the knees.

amother

Scarlet ↓

Mon, Jul 04 2022, 9:51 pm

First she slides the pants off under the swim dress. Then she puts underwear on under the swim dress then she slides her dress or skirt and shirt on and takes off the swim dress under and then pulls it out the neck. Have her practice doing this at home a few times.

↑ ra_mom

Mon, Jul 04 2022, 9:53 pm

amother [ OP ] wrote:

Its a dress with pants under it. Pants are not attached. Dress is long sleeves and below the knees.

Buy her a loose changing poncho (there are all different sizes available online).
https://www.amazon.com/VNICGFO.....r=8-8

DrMom

Mon, Jul 04 2022, 10:45 pm

amother [ Scarlet ] wrote:

I agree this is the best way, but why aren't there at least a few changing rooms at this place? Seems weird.

amother

Ghostwhite

Mon, Jul 04 2022, 11:27 pm

Oy I feel her. I hated swimming as a child for this reason too. Please consider her emotions andike above poster, validation - a lot. Ask her what will make her more comfortable. Maybe she is ashamed about a certain body part that she is self conscious about or her figure in general?(that was me)
Can she go with larger bathrobe + a giant beach towel that is wider and longer? This way she has a towel on her for "security" and an extra large one so nobody sees when blocking her off..
Perhaps she can buddy up with someone that they hold for her and she holds for them every time

SG18

Mon, Jul 04 2022, 11:34 pm

I'm sorry, this is not a "life skill." In my adult life, I always change in a bathroom/changing room. Calling it a life skill is diminishing your daughter's sense of privacy and modesty.
How are there no bathrooms to change in?? Every camp or pool I've been to has had bathrooms.

amother

Coffee

Tue, Jul 05 2022, 3:11 am

They probably don’t have enough private bathroom stalls for every girl to be changing in at the same time. The camp is sending mixed messages by requiring a swim dress but not providing privacy to change. I remember being a kid. If I were her I’d stay in the swim dress until I get to a place with a bathroom. But the camp probably doesn’t allow that.

imasinger

Tue, Jul 05 2022, 3:15 am

The poncho idea sounds great. I wouldn't want to put dry regular clothes over a wet bathing suit before taking it off either.

amother

Honeysuckle ↓

Tue, Jul 05 2022, 4:30 am

For a seven year old (and many older than that), it might be very difficult to have half dry and half wet and keep the dry dry.

We've had this. Realistically, teach her the changing method, but she can also ask to go to the bathroom. Yes, over and over. One of my kids had this and we couldn't get past it. Eventually the camp just let her use the bathroom to change. The condition was usually that she was quick, and sometimes that we would sign off on her going to the bathroom on her own when usually a counselor had to go along (if it wasn't right by where they were.) One summer, a group of other kids saw what was up and ended up joining, all going together with a commitment that each was very quick and they could only use one of the two stalls to change, so the other was left available for people who needed it.

amother

Diamond

Tue, Jul 05 2022, 4:43 am

ra_mom wrote:

Buy her a loose changing poncho (there are all different sizes available online).
https://www.amazon.com/VNICGFO.....r=8-8

A life changer. I bought these for all my boys.

amother

Midnight

Tue, Jul 05 2022, 4:44 am

So interesting. I thought my DS was the only one.
He's 7. Loves the pool. Refuses to go swimming at camp because the bathrooms have no locks and people can just walk in on him while he's changing.
He has a bathrobe to wear on top and I explained how he can change while wearing it but he refuses.