Tzistzis on three year old

amother

Wed, Mar 16 2022, 3:35 pm

I’m a morah for 2 and 3 yr olds. One of y students has started wearing tzistzis but is nowhere near potty trained . Another teacher said this is against Halacha. Should I tell the mother? Shes honestly a pretty difficult parent - complains about me a lot. Also her child has a lot of problems- super aggressive with the other kids(I counted one day- he had hit the other kids thirteen times by lunch) and I really need her to come around to getting hi helpso maybe I should pick my battles?

amother

Lawngreen

Wed, Mar 16 2022, 3:40 pm

As far as I know, not everyone holds this way. I would not say anything to the mother.

amother

Hyacinth

Wed, Mar 16 2022, 4:13 pm

Completely not your business. And many don’t believe that. But that’s beside the point, I don’t think you should ever police a parents Judaism.

dena613

Wed, Mar 16 2022, 5:06 pm

I WOULD work much harder with his hitting.
A morah needs to be within arm's reach of him as much as possible when he's in hitting mode.
That is unacceptable.

amother

Pumpkin

Wed, Mar 16 2022, 5:11 pm

We were told to put tzitzis on 3 yr old even if not toilet trained.
(But it doesn’t matter bec he is 3.5 now and toilet trained and refuses to wear tzitzis. )

amother

Pearl

Wed, Mar 16 2022, 5:14 pm

My son wasn't trained when he turned 3. We asked our right wing, yeshivish rav and he said my son can wear tzitzis.
Regardless, it would never be your place to tell a parent something like that. How does it effect you doing your job?
I'd be more concerned about the child's behavior and what's being done by both the parent and the teacher to ensure the safety of the rest of the class.

notshanarishona ↓

Wed, Mar 16 2022, 5:35 pm

The bigger question, why are you allowing him to regularly harm other kids? A kid who is hitting that often needs a shadow or some kind of individualized attention. Leave the tzitsis alone. that's their issue if it makes the mom feel good about it.

Last edited by notshanarishona on Wed, Mar 16 2022, 5:39 pm; edited 1 time in total

out-of-towner

Wed, Mar 16 2022, 5:36 pm

Our Chassidish Rav told us to put Tzitzis on DS at 3. He was nowhere near toilet trained.

↑ notshanarishona

Wed, Mar 16 2022, 5:52 pm

out-of-towner wrote:

Our Chassidish Rav told us to put Tzitzis on DS at 3. He was nowhere near toilet trained.

Interesting.. we /our rav hold it's assur and a bizayon to the tzitsis so I can see why it would feel weird as a teacher to have tzitsis in the way while changing diapers but I never knew there were actual rabannim or halachic sources to do it differently. I always just thought parents preferred the look.

amother

Steel

Wed, Mar 16 2022, 7:58 pm

out-of-towner wrote:

Our Chassidish Rav told us to put Tzitzis on DS at 3. He was nowhere near toilet trained.

Same

amother

DarkGreen

Wed, Mar 16 2022, 8:01 pm

out-of-towner wrote:

Our Chassidish Rav told us to put Tzitzis on DS at 3. He was nowhere near toilet trained.

Same. We were told to put on at 3 no matter what. It's not really different than him wearing tzitzis while using the bathroom and that they all do.

amother

↑ Mistyrose ↓

Wed, Mar 16 2022, 8:04 pm

Totally would focus on a reward program sticker chart and all to modify his hitting behavior. You need to help him learn and to protect the other kids. 13 times hitting in one day? simply not ok
As the kids get more verbal the hitting lessens B"H.
And on creating a better working collaborative relationship with the parent. I mean why were you two teachers discussing her and their hashkafa like that? If you do not like her and/or the child that for sure comes through chas v shalom.

amother

Bluebell

Thu, Mar 17 2022, 2:39 am

If the tzitzit are getting dirty and difficult for you to deal with, I would say something.

amother

↑ Mistyrose

Thu, Mar 17 2022, 4:22 am

if tsitzis were getting dirty their hashkafa and minhag still would not be someone else's business. Then it might be a simple request to put an extra pair along with the extra clothes in cubby.