Monetizing or exploiting tragedies

amother

Mauve

Wed, Dec 15 2021, 10:34 am

amother [ Cherry ] wrote:

Wouldn’t the insurance company pay for all of her medical expenses? From the drunk driver? It seems a pretty slam dunk case and that’s what insurance is for.

I understand the helpless feeling to just do something, but I remember the social media crowd fundraising a million for someone else who also went through a tragedy and she needed money, sure, but not that kind of money. There’s so much need it makes me sad that some people’s need never gets heard because it’s not in the news.

The driver of the car that was hit will mostly get sued by the families of the girls she was driving. That’s very common.

If the drunk driver is not insured the driver and the families of the girls will get nothing. Even if the driver is insured the policy limits may not be very high so the driver may not get much.

amother

Black ↓

Wed, Dec 15 2021, 10:42 am

How about the famous Instagram accounts that just ignored the tragedy completely and continued selling her product. I can’t handle someone bringing us along to her trip to Auschwitz and then not mentioning one word about a fellow Jews tragedy. Monsey is not that removed from the five towns and a short mention would have been tasteful.

↑ justmarried:) ↓

Wed, Dec 15 2021, 10:43 am

She didnt work as
A make up artist. She worked in the health field.
You obviously dont know much about her and her situation. Iyh she should have a speedy complete recovery soon but she may not be able to work another day in her life. She has kids that are going to need to be married off. And you cant survive in the 5 towns on 50k a year. Tuition for 3 children is that amount. Yeah its possible to get tuition reduced but still. She has a long road ahead of her and she and her family will have endless expenses.

amother

Blueberry

Wed, Dec 15 2021, 10:44 am

amother [ Bluebell ] wrote:

I understand and agree. But let's say she earned 50k a year. She's a makeup artist. A million dollars is a full 20 years income. Who knows, maybe she'll need it. But there's a reason the fundraiser started at 350k. Should we collect 20 years income for her? What about 30 years income? 50 years? What's that right amount and what's too much? May she have a complete refuah.

Your posts are making me nauseous.
What calculations your making, how sweet of you.
Your making calculations of how much she earned?!?!
How low can you go?!?!
This woman has a long recovery ahead of her.
Insurance has deductibles and co-pays that can add up to tens of thousands of dollars. Recovering from an accident is not a one time thing. The medical bills and needs due to the accident can continue for years.
Who said she had full time household help till now. And will probably need it now... and therapies... for her, for her children, life costs money and she is in a situation no one should ever have to be and people want to help. Jews are Rachmanim, we want to help.

(I honestly don't know how someone can live jn the five towns on 50k a year, so even your "calculations " are way off, so maybe you should stop calculating)

amother

Lilac

Wed, Dec 15 2021, 10:49 am

If she's very lucky, insurance MIGHT cover the hospital bills. And that's a very big if. Plenty of insurances still make you pay 10% or 20% out of pocket (and 10% of a very large number is...still a pretty large number). She may likely need physical therapy to really recover, and insurances are notorious for being stingy with PT (like, they'll cover 10 sessions when she really needs a year of twice a week or something). To say nothing of, she may not be able to work for a very long time, possibly ever depending on the severity of her injuries. I could see a million dollars not going as far as you'd think. Bh she lives in a community of such chesed! I wish everyone who finds themselves in such circumstances should have that kind of support available.

amother

↑ Cerulean

Wed, Dec 15 2021, 10:51 am

amother [ Bluebell ] wrote:

You need to stop counting other peoples money. This woman is in the icu. She and her family will probably need all the money they can get.

amother

↑ Feverfew

Wed, Dec 15 2021, 11:29 am

amother [ Black ] wrote:

I think this is better then fake sympathy or I’ll talk about it bec I need to.

As I said. Your d*mned if you do. D*mned if you don’t.

If someone isn’t directly connected they don’t have to say anything. It may even be inappropriate.
And some ppl aren’t emotionally there. That is also ok.

Honestly unfortunately kids have died tragically before. I’ve never seen an outpouring like this before. It’s beautiful. But why wasn’t it brought up by ever single tragedy that append in klal yisroel. Is every instagrammer required to talk about each one. I think that is unrealistic and wrong to expect.

amother

↑ Cinnamon ↓

Wed, Dec 15 2021, 12:05 pm

amother [ Black ] wrote:

Literally d@mned if you do, d@mned if you don't. Now a short mention is tasteful? But if it was one slide you'd complain that it's too short. If it's 3 slides you'd complain that it's an attention grab.

Monsey is a completely different community. I myself only know about this from IG, and geographically the 5T is closer to me.

Everyone can choose what to post on their own page and you can choose whether to follow or not.

amother

↑ Bluebell ↓

Wed, Dec 15 2021, 12:06 pm

amother [ Cerulean ] wrote:

You need to stop counting other peoples money. This woman is in the icu. She and her family will probably need all the money they can get.

Nobody is counting anyone's money.

There are 2 separate things going on. The first is that she needs a refuah shlaima. The second is that she will need financial assistance going forward. Is it a 500k, a million, 2 million, or 50 million? The people who organize these fund raisers have to give this a little thought. Especially in an instance were the money collected is going well in access of the amount originally asked for.

Please stop making this into a story as if I'm not interested in her recovery and only thinking about money. I'm following her recovery very closely and davening for her. I'm also curious how fundraisers work in terms of setting an appropriate dollar amount.

I'm sorry if that offends you.

amother

↑ Cinnamon ↓

Wed, Dec 15 2021, 12:10 pm

amother [ Bluebell ] wrote:

What do you care if it's 50 million. Like I said, the public attention/ sympathy will dry up one day but the expenses won't.
Tzedaka is in the marketing. That's fine. The q you should be asking is how to elicit funds for other causes, not how to cut off the funds people are interested to give to this one.

amother

Smokey

Wed, Dec 15 2021, 12:14 pm

Being that the driver was likely uninsured, I'm wondering why there's no fundraising for the girls that were in the car.

The nifteres's family could probably use it, as can the other girls, to help with costs and (physical and emotional) therapy and so on.

And I agree that there are going to rough years of healing for the mother and the time to fundraise is now. Yasher koach to those who set up the fund and kept it going.

amother

↑ Bluebell ↓

Wed, Dec 15 2021, 12:23 pm

amother [ Cinnamon ] wrote:

Im not sure if you're being serious or trolling now.

Where are you getting that I'm interested in cutting off funds? I'm curious about circumstances when money is collected far in access of need. That may or may not be the case here.

amother

Jasmine

Wed, Dec 15 2021, 12:27 pm

amother [ Smokey ] wrote:

15 year old girls are not typically breadwinners for their families as this single mom is. Two of the girls were discharged from the hospital less than a day after the accident. I’m sure they’re traumatized and could benefit from therapy but I think we all know multiple people who could benefit from therapy and unfortunately there’s not really much fundraising or funds or support for that. I personally try to give whenever someone asks me for money for therapy but have definitely seen that some tzedakas (ie cancer, special needs) are for whatever reason a lot more compelling to people than others (ie mental health).

I also know many campaigns that have raised well over a million dollars for families where one parent passed away. This mom is the only breadwinner at this point and iyH she should have a miraculous recovery but … they’ll definitely need way more than the sum originally mentioned on the page to support the family over the next few years.

Finally… the posted who doesn’t think they need the money, just don’t donate. I didn’t. (I very much think they do need the money and if there is a need for me to donate I will but as I said before some cases are so compelling they take off and raise so much money I’d rather save my money for tzedakas that resonate with me that aren’t able to raise so much money.) BUT I’m grateful and supportive of those who are donating to this cause as sadly I think this family will require all of it.

amother

↑ Cinnamon ↓

Wed, Dec 15 2021, 12:28 pm

amother [ Bluebell ] wrote:

No I'm serious.
I'm saying this story is getting good marketing so there's a lot of money coming in.
They can choose to close the campaign at any time. If they don't then they will use the money. After bills they can invest or hold it for the family or whatever.
I'm saying: There is never excess of need.
And if I donated to this cause and they took my $5 and gave it to a different orphan instead, that's stealing and misappropriation.

amother

↑ Cherry

Wed, Dec 15 2021, 12:41 pm

I also believe that the 5 towns is a very rich community. I need to save my tzedakah money for our own community, and that the Rabbis involved should fundraise from their shuls before this huge global appeal.

That being said, מי כעמך ישראל.

I will continue to include Miriam in my prayers. How this could happen is so awful and beyond imagination.