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Forum -> Parenting our children -> Teenagers and Older children
Kids don't respect father - can it change?



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amother


 

Post Tue, Dec 25 2007, 8:46 am
I think DH realizes he's been too soft on kids, but fast forward to the present when he comes near them with any disciplining, they shoo him away like an annoying cat, and he runs for cover after a barrage of insults.

How do you effectively set limits with how a child can or can't talk to a parent? How do you set boundaries on what will be accepted and what not? What system have others used for Chutzpah? One child threatens that they will not go to school unless..... and then it's a real problem to get them to go.

DH will never go for therapy. He'll just put it all on my shoulders to deal with.

To those that have been in a similar sitch- Your responses are my only hope for change.
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happymom




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Dec 25 2007, 8:48 am
he has a choice. he can either go to therapy and learn what the real issues are and learn how to stand up for himself and get respect, or, he can continue the way it is. thats how I see it.
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mimivan




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Dec 25 2007, 3:50 pm
I think by the time they are teenagers (I only have to go on my own experiences as a teenager since mine are little) you can talk to them like an adult. Would I allow an adult to insult me? He could deal with them the same way as he would an adult, and tell them how he feels. Maybe at a neutral time, when they aren't in the mood of insulting him, he could have an honest talk about how no one should be spoken to in that way, especially not fathers. This should not be in the way of a lecture, but again, focusing on his feelings.

I think he will gradually gain respect if he makes it clear he won't tolerate it.
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