I gave engagement party gift, do I need to give wedding gift

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Forum -> Relationships -> Giving Gifts

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amother

Tue, Oct 23 2007, 10:14 pm

My good friend got married recently, for her vort (engagement party) I organized a nice gift from a couple of friends together. We did not make her a wedding shower (not so mandatory in my circles) and now I'm wondering if I should get her a wedding gift. I can't spend too much and I feel stupid giving something cheap. There's no one that I can chip in with bec. she doesn't have that many close friends that would be interested in giving more than the vort present they gave. My question is do most people give both-engagement presents and wedding presents? I want to do what's right so if it's really not nice please let me know.

Clarissa

Tue, Oct 23 2007, 10:34 pm

I would say yes, but you really don't have to spend a lot at all. You could get something small and meaningful, and I'm sure they'd appreciate it. Just showing that you care is enough. I got some gifts that didn't cost a lot, but touched me.

Ruchel

Wed, Oct 24 2007, 9:55 am

most people gave me both, but I agree with Clarissa.
No shower here either, never seen one irl.

chocolate moose

Wed, Oct 24 2007, 10:56 am

In Lub we don't, but it's up to you. It's never a "must" to give a gift.

greeneyes

Wed, Oct 24 2007, 11:48 am

I don't think you have to give another gift.

My friends all chipped in for gifts at my engagement party, and that was it. The wedding gifts were mostly from family friends.

BrachaVHatzlocha

Wed, Oct 24 2007, 1:25 pm

in my circles, if a friend chips in for shower gift, she doesnt give a wedding gift. family is different.
if u dont have lots of $ or newly married, I'm sure ur friend will understand.

manhattanmom

Mon, Feb 25 2008, 11:16 am

It's generally appropriate to give a gift when you attend a simcha--someone is paying for your meal.

ChossidMom

Mon, Feb 25 2008, 11:26 am

Manhattanmom, I beg to differ.
The gift I bring is for the Chosson/Kallah or whatever. It has no correlation whatsoever to the meal that the host provides. Often people think that they have to calculate how much $$ were spent on the meal and buy a gift accordingly. I say hogwash to that. I buy what I can. Usually a very inexpensive gift.

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