Mothers of curly-haired girls, what do you do on Shabbos?

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amother

Plum ↓

Mon, Oct 16 2017, 9:18 pm

My 6 year old DD has curly hair that is only manageable when it's sprayed wet, brushed/combed, put in a ponytail and then gelled.

On Shabbos or Yom Tov, when I can't spray it, brush/comb it, or gel it, it looks like a tangled mess (even pulled back into a messy ponytail). My other daughter has straight/wavy hair and it looks okay, if sometimes a bit messy, without being brushed, but my curly-haired daughter's hair is impossible.

Do any of you have any tricks or tips to share?

flmommy

Mon, Oct 16 2017, 9:23 pm

Why can't you use a spray bottle with water to "re-activate" the gel? I thought that was Ok on Shabbos.

amother

Puce

Mon, Oct 16 2017, 9:30 pm

flmommy wrote:

Why can't you use a spray bottle with water to "re-activate" the gel? I thought that was Ok on Shabbos.

I thought reactivating the gel was precisely why some poskim dont allow gel before Shabbos. They say its Bonah.

challahchallah

Mon, Oct 16 2017, 10:10 pm

Before Shabbos, can you put it back into a tight ponytail, then braid it (so there are two ponytail holders, one at the top and one at the bottom of the braid)? This is what I did growing up. Not ideal, but way better than leaving it loose and hoping for the best.

Blessing1

Mon, Oct 16 2017, 10:19 pm

Gel it into a tight bun before shabbos, should hold if it's tight enough.
I use a spray bottle with water & a shabbos brush. We even use hairspray on shabbos.

amother

↑ Plum

Tue, Oct 17 2017, 12:17 am

Her hair is too short for a whole pony / bun / braid. She wears it in a half-pony during the week (and it's a bit messy then too, but manageable). I brush it and put it in a pony and gel it before Shabbos, but by the time that she wakes up in the morning, it is a royal wreck.

myname1

Tue, Oct 17 2017, 2:22 am

With my own hair, I used to re-wet it on Shabbos and use my fingers to cmb through/smooth out a bit. I learned it's okay as long as you're careful and not for sure breaking hairs. I never heard the re-activating gel being boneh thing, but I think I probably had some kind of spray/gel/cream in my hair from the night before.

Ruchel

Tue, Oct 17 2017, 3:43 am

Gel on child? I have never seen this. Why not be curly?

amother

Vermilion

Tue, Oct 17 2017, 8:06 am

Ruchel wrote:

Gel on child? I have never seen this. Why not be curly?

The hair is still curly, the gel just tames the friz, so that the hair is not one big poof but in nice softer curls. unfortunately it does not last over night...

esther malka

Tue, Oct 17 2017, 8:22 am

I recently took my daughter to a deva curl salon to learn how to manage her curls. It was a pricey investment but totally worth it, her hair is amazing now. From what I understood the key is hydration. Also don't dry her hair with a towel but with an old t shirt. Maybe leave in conditioner would help too. I think gel dried out the hair. Good luck!

LovesHashem

Tue, Oct 17 2017, 8:28 am

Deva curl is great.....if you live in the USA. I believe they use the curly girl method which is awesome.

I use the water only method and its awesome! And its totally good for shabbos.

purple 1

Tue, Oct 17 2017, 9:27 am

Curly hair is only meant to be brushed after a shower/bath. dont try to brush it on shobbos. A curly haired girl doesn't have that flat pony look that straight haired girls have

amother

Goldenrod

Tue, Oct 17 2017, 7:02 pm

Spray with water and then spray gel before shabbos and she wears it down with a headband Friday night.
Shabbos morning, we spray with water and spray gel again and it's usually fine to wear down.
If she slept on her back and it got very frizzy, we put it in a pony shabbos morning.

Her hair is not very thick or long, which makes it easier.

yael212 ↓

Wed, Oct 18 2017, 6:55 am

I have curly hair, it sounds just like your daughter’s. My mother growing up had no idea what to do and as a result I hated my hair for a long time. Finally in high school I went to a hairdresser that taughter me to care for it and now I love my curly hair.

do NOT brush your daughter’s hair ever. After she’s bathed when hair is wet finger comb it or use a wide toothed comb. Brushing curly hair frizzes it so much. Also, don’t shampoo every day. Shampoo once or twice a week and just put conditioner the other days. And if it’s really humid or a rainy day that day just don’t wash her hair (unless it’s really dirty and can’t be avoided obviously).

Don’t put her hair in a braid or pony wet, only after it dries. Let it air dry naturally.

After her bath put in a bit of leave in conditioner and instead of gel use a cream especially for curls. Also look into a de frizzing oil like John Frieda or similar if not for everyday especially for Shabbos and Yom Tov..you can find this at any drugstore. Do this before Shabbos and have her wear it down. Before bed when it’s dry or mostly dry leave down put in a loose bun and on Saturday morning just put it in a pony or bun or braid. It will look fine.

Teach her how to care for her hair from an early age and she will love it. My sisters were slaves to the flat iron and blow drier and once I made peace with my hair and stopped trying to make mine straight it was so nice to just Put product in and let it air dry.

↑ yael212

Wed, Oct 18 2017, 7:01 am

And also whoever posted about using an old t shirt instead of a towel...yes yes yes. Forgot to mention this.

In terms of products: deva curl is great, I used this for a long time when I lived in the US. The living proof brand curl cream is great as well. Now that I live in Israel I use Moroccan oil hair cream and Moroccan oil and just a Stam leave in conditioner. You obviously might not want (or can’t )to invest in pricey products for a 6 year old’s hair-my mother would never have until the hair dresser lectured her when I was 14. If that’s the case just get the drugstore version of a leave in conditioner, curl creme (or gel if you’re partial), and frizz oil/serum. There are sooo many good products you can find at the drugstore or supermarket these days! Good luck Smile

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