What is chassidish life like?

HooRYou ↓

Thu, Jun 28 2007, 5:52 am

Quote:

how do chassidish mothers train their daughters to be mothers and wives?

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Yeah! maybe I can join a late starters in household management training course :lol: !!

Arita, thanks for keeping the thread alive.

If we are asking specific questions, I would like to specify with the dress one how it is decided how a woman is to cover her hair. I heard once that it goes by the woman's mother's minhag which would explain why sometimes even within one Chasidus there are variations. Also, for those of you who double cover how the second covering (I.e. hat vs. scarf) developed.

I hope this isn't intrusive to the Chassidishe ladies. I am really interested and really do not mean to be disrespectful.

↑ creativemommyto3 ↓

Thu, Jun 28 2007, 6:41 am

By the way, I also mean how to women keep their ruchniyus while being good mommies and wives too? I like the tichel on shabbos idea with the apron. Are their other things like that?

↑ creativemommyto3 ↓

Thu, Jun 28 2007, 10:05 am

Hi, on that thread about breslov getting into the chassidish forum , it was mentioned that chassidim don't want to go into the ins and outs of being chassidish. What are all the ins and outs of daily life in a chassidish home , including yom tov and shabbos. I am all eyes for answers and even books to read on the subject. I just bought one for women by the biala rebbe.

↑ amother ↓

Thu, Jun 28 2007, 12:08 pm

how should I answer this question? it is sort of how does a frum parent pass on her frumness to her child?? it's the home, school and teaching by example... that is why every chasidisha family will differ one anther....
ask one question at a time and I will try to answer. about covering the hair. in my chasidus we shave the night after the chasunah, put on a wig and cover the wig with a hat /tichel-band. that is what our Rebbe wants and asks us to do... do all ppl do all of that? no! but the majority does... I hope that answers your question.

↑ creativemommyto3 ↓

Thu, Jun 28 2007, 1:27 pm

How do you feel about not having your hair anymore after shaving?

I heard that there are specific dishes like farfel that are made for shabbos b/c of gematria, what are they and why?

↑ Mama Bear ↓

Thu, Jun 28 2007, 1:51 pm

Well, since I grew up in a community where everyone shaves, it never occurred to me that it's something to be upset about.

Honestly, to me, a married woman having sweaty knotty hair under a shaitel or snood, seems kinda gross. and it must be really itchy in the heat!

I am not sure about the gematriyos of the sahbbos food, but I know there is such a thing.

crbc

Thu, Jun 28 2007, 2:17 pm

Try a book by Rabbi Dovid Meisels called "Shabbos Secrets". It describes different Chasidic minhogim and reasons for them related to Shabbos and describes Shabbos dishes as well as meaning behind them. It also has beautiful color pictures. The book is few years old, but I think there are new books such as "Pesach Secrets" published recently.

↑ amother ↓

Thu, Jun 28 2007, 2:30 pm

Typical Friday night menu:

Challa
Gefilte fish and/or salmon/white fish
Chicken soup with noodles or knaidlach
chicken, potato or lukshen kugel, farfel
compote/dessert

Shabbos morning:
Challa
fish
eggs salad with onions/liver
cholent, kishka, kugel
dessert

This is basic and of course there are variations to each course.
And then there are some specialty foods which some make every week, some never like tzimmus, p'tcha/gala, onion kugel...

↑ HooRYou ↓

Thu, Jun 28 2007, 5:31 pm

amother wrote:

in my chasidus we shave the night after the chasunah, put on a wig and cover the wig with a hat /tichel-band. that is what our Rebbe wants and asks us to do... do all ppl do all of that? no! but the majority does... I hope that answers your question.

This is sort of exactly my question. When you got married how did you decide if you were a hat person or a tichel-band person? Did you follow your mother's minhag? You Chosson's family's minhag? Personal choice?

I hope this isn't too personal.

↑ Mama Bear ↓

Thu, Jun 28 2007, 5:47 pm

most people follow their families minhag, although some women accept a more stringent form of head covering if the chosson wants it and the girl is the type to want it too. in certain cases there are reasons for the girl to wear a lesser covering than her mother. but this is usually decided between the girl and her mother together.

↑ creativemommyto3 ↓

Fri, Jun 29 2007, 6:30 am

What do chassidishe girls /women learn? Is it only things like Tzena Urena?

Where is the minhag of setting up the chosson and kallah with all the furniture etc for their new home? All the gifts for the year of engagement??(could that be from the inyan of Eliezer giving gifts to rivkah imeinu)

↑ amother ↓

Fri, Jun 29 2007, 10:51 am

I am the one that wrote about covering hte sheitle with a band/hat.. as a rule you follow your mothers minhag... however s/t hte chosson/chossons family will ask (before the shiddich) if you can wear differently...

shabbos menu is like written before... why we eat certain foods there are a lot of reasons I'm not familiar with them I once heard we eat farfel that all our sins should be 'farfallen" (yiddish - fall away, done away with...) tzimmus ( sweet carrots) is a minhag I follow we eat a drop every week ( I don't make it fresh every week I make a lot of it and bag it for lots of weeks in the freezer...) there should be a sefer on all this....

the gift question and furniture is a good question... I'm not sure ( but once again don't the yeshivish, litvish couples get the same more or less...) maybe b/c we get married earlier? maybe b/c hte parents want to help torah learning? maybe its follow the leader and no one knows why Very Happy

? I'm not sure!

↑ chocolate moose ↓

Fri, Jun 29 2007, 12:41 pm

In Lubavitch we're not as concerned with what we eat, other than keeping Kosher (the way we're taught. we have our own chumras), and how we dress, other than the rules of tsnius.

Our schools focus on our kids becoming shluchim and helping others.

↑ batya_d ↓

Fri, Jun 29 2007, 1:55 pm

amother wrote:

I
there should be a sefer on all this....

The is-- as mentioned earlier, Shabbos Secrets by R' Dovid Meisels. It's a nice series, with pictures and stories of gedolim, as well as lots of fascinating info on the reasons for various chassidishe minhagim.

↑ Mama Bear ↓

Fri, Jun 29 2007, 3:53 pm

I dont think the furniture and jewelry has roots in chasidishe minhagim; it's just a cultural thing, chasidishe families are more 'balebatish' in their possesions, such as the way we dress (no casual t-shirts with long denim skirts, etc.) as for furnishing a couple fully when they get married, the young men are usually in kollel and live on the wife's secretarial salary. So the parents usually 'start out' the young couple with all the apartment furnishings etc., which is paid usually from the kallah's wages, with the parents contributing whatever is not covered by her wages. This way the couple can live off the wife's earnings, with the husband in kollel, without worrying about setting up their new place.