I GIVE UP | Imamother

↑ JRKmommy

Wed, Mar 14 2007, 1:18 pm

I don't think that there is a quick and easy solution - but it's good that she does have the brilliance and artistic ability. Perhaps that can grab her interest. Does she use those talents to express herself at all? Perhaps she could let out some of the pain through drawing, poetry, short story writing, etc. Being "brilliant/artsy" can be an alternate persona to "depressed troubled girl".

↑ lotte

Wed, Mar 14 2007, 1:26 pm

I have a great idea,just remembered that Ruchama Clapman form MASK organization-can help you a lot!
that is what they do all day and it is free!

↑ su7kids

Wed, Mar 14 2007, 1:37 pm

Green, is she interested in home schooling? Or "educating herself" at home by registering for an online high school or something (I don't know her age), and maybe she can do her education with focusing on what her talents are. It could be that the other subjects that she doesn't hae an interest in, are boring her.

Artistic people sometimes have a hard time with logic, like math, etc. Maybe she can do the minimum and then go to a design school or something like that.

Creative people are quite different, [that's probably why they design so many strange looking clothes, wear strange looking clothes themselves, etc] and putting her in a "regular" school may just not be working for her.

Good luck. This isn't easy. But being Green is easier! LOL

↑ ssbarnes

Wed, Mar 14 2007, 2:22 pm

My son had been seeing a wonderful counselor. When became a stay-at-home mom, we tried 6 other people, but he just didn't "click" with any of them.

Our latest battle is that his teenage body needs 12 hours of sleep each night, but he doesn't want to go to bed as early as his younger siblings. He has agreed to go to sleep an hour earlier and I let him sleep in an extra hour in the morning. (I wish he would nap!)

I am homeschooling him. He is doing very well with it. In the fall he is joining a homeschool co-op that is heavy on the arts.

Is she willing to sit down with you and dicuss options for her future and come up with a plan to get there?

↑ greenfire ↓

Wed, Mar 14 2007, 4:22 pm

We have actually tried the home schooling - virtual schoolhouse - good program in the sense that she could do work in a variety of ways in home or at location with tutor or on computer - didn't work for her either ... so now she is trying a public school with an IEP and has a better chance - except that she s/t slips back ... anyway just came back from dr and he said to make sure she takes med same time everyday ... so ... we shall see ...

↑ southernbubby

Wed, Mar 14 2007, 4:30 pm

You are putting so much effort into helping her that surely she can see that you care about her and that life is worthwhile.

↑ greenfire

Wed, Mar 14 2007, 4:43 pm

you would think ... anyway also she actually is good at math 2 + 2 is always 4 - nobody can judge ... her creativity they can ... but for herself she draws, etc. my friends son was looking at a drawing of hers that was on fridge and was thinking what to say (he's 4) and I though he was going to say scary cause picture was intense ... instead he said "no - she is an artist"

Ima'la

Wed, Mar 14 2007, 5:31 pm

teneleven wrote:

Don't give up green!
Talk to Hashem,cry to him, ask him & believe in your heart that only him-up there can help you & save you -and you will see the light!
My heart is with you!

I've told you before that I try to stay away from practical advice on raising teenagers...but I think teneleven's advice is definitely good! I used to work with a youth group... jr. HS and HS kids... I know of at least 3 cases of kids who were going off the derech, a couple of them really messed up situations..... baruch Hashem, b'chasdei Shamayim, all of them are now married to b'nei Torah. I asked them how they came back and they told me their stories...and IT MADE NO SENSE!!! (ok, teenagers never make sense, but still...) I am sure it had a lot to do with their mothers' tears and tefillos.

"Hazor'im b'dimah b'rinah yiktzoru..."