Anybody with twins ever had one repeat a grade?

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Forum -> Parenting our children -> Twins, Triplets, and more

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amother ↓

Sat, Feb 22 2014, 5:00 pm

I'm contemplating having my ds repeat a grade and his twin go ahead. My dh is convinced it's a bad idea and it will follow him forever. I thought of doing this in pre1a but everyone convinced me not too bc he is a twin. He is socially and academically behind. I am paying a fortune in tutors and counseling. He will still need it even if he does repeat but maybe things will be easier for him... Any thoughts? My dd is b'h a strong student socially and academically and I wouldn't think of leaving her back...there birthdays are in the Fall so they are at the young end of the class.

Amelia Bedelia

Sat, Feb 22 2014, 5:15 pm

Are they in the same school? If not, I would strongly suggest you do it!

gold21

Sat, Feb 22 2014, 5:17 pm

A set of twins that's related to me- boy and girl- The boy is one grade behind his twin sister. He is actually a bright kid, he does well academically, but his sister is at the top of the class and needed to move ahead (they are December babies and could have been placed in either of 2 grades- so she was pushed ahead and he stayed on grade level).

↑ amother ↓

Sat, Feb 22 2014, 5:29 pm

Amelia Bedelia wrote:

Are they in the same school? If not, I would strongly suggest you do it!

no they are not..but my son is old enough and aware enough that she would be ahead.

oliveoil

Sat, Feb 22 2014, 5:32 pm

If they're in separate schools, go for it.

MommytoB

Sat, Feb 22 2014, 5:37 pm

Regardless of the twin factor, I have yet to hear of someone who regrets holding back. But plenty of regrets for NOT holding back.

↑ amother ↓

Sat, Feb 22 2014, 5:42 pm

I have twin in laws. Because of a school change one was held back a grade. He is smart but not as academically inclined as his sister. I think it's hard for him that she is ahead and graduating earlier than him. It definitely helps that ones a boy and ones a girl. Less obvious competition that way.

↑ amother ↓

Sat, Feb 22 2014, 5:47 pm

MommytoB wrote:

Regardless of the twin factor, I have yet to hear of someone who regrets holding back. But plenty of regrets for NOT holding back.

oh I do regret not holding back in pre1a it would of been easier..fourth grade is a little harder.

↑ amother ↓

Sat, Feb 22 2014, 5:49 pm

amother wrote:

This is also a school change...if he would stay in his current school...we wouldn't hold him back but in order for him to get accepted to the new school I would have to keep him back bc of his academic and social issues.
Thanks for the replies everyone!

TwinsMommy

Sat, Feb 22 2014, 6:12 pm

My twins are 7 and in first grade and it was crystal clear we had to grade accelerate one twin for math. We refused grade acceleration for all subjects (he's special needs and incredibly immature) but agreed JUST to math. So he's in 4th grade math part of the time and she's in 1st grade math. Works fine because they're in two diff schools AND they're a boy and a girl. I think if they were the same relations in the same school I might have had a harder decision.

We also know a family on our street, also frum, who has the girl in a frum school 2 grades higher than her special needs twin brother in public school. Again, boy/girl, 2 diff schools. Seems to be fine.

What do the teachers/ administration say?!?! Is the twin on an IEP?

↑ amother

Sat, Feb 22 2014, 7:43 pm

I know triplets that almost ended up in 3 different grades for a year or two. But then the boy didn't skip in the end… The girls repeated - one repeated 4th (or was it 5th) and the other repeated seventh. Their brother stayed at grade level straight through high school but there was talk of him skipping for a bit.

bnm

Sat, Feb 22 2014, 9:13 pm

In BP girls have 3 grades before first and the boys only have 2 so the boys end up sounding like they are ahead. my neighbor has g/b twin so the daughter is in pre 1 a but the son is kita aleph already. its normal around here.

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