do you like the way you look

amother ↓

Tue, Dec 08 2009, 10:48 am

I have a really big nose and I feel that it ruins my face. I was the most beautiful little girl when I was young but slowly my features changed. the color of my eyes also changed from a gorgeous blue to something like hazel and my hair was beautiful and blonde and now I wear a short sheitel but synthetic bec. that is what my family wears. I wish I could be prettier. sometimes I feel so ugly. especially when I see others my age look so beautiful in their long sheitels and pretty faces!

↑ amother ↓

Tue, Dec 08 2009, 11:23 am

If I would look now the way I grew up & the way my family looks, I wouldnt look as pretty as I do, although I still dont think im too pretty either.
Every person sees themselves differently than other ppl see them.

You see every wrinkle, pimple, dimple....
Not everyone sees it all.

Lady Godiva

Tue, Dec 08 2009, 11:33 am

When you look in the mirror, quite often you see things that others don't see. You might see a big nose and others might see an average nose on a pretty face.
About eye color, hazel is a beautiful color. You can bring out the green in it with the right makeup.
Do you wear makeup at all? Do you get dressed in pretty clothes?
About the wig, would you be able to get a human hair wig that might look more natural? Just because that's what your family is used to, doesn't mean you can't do something different. If it's a religious issue, ask your Rabbi.
There are other ways to feel pretty too. Put on perfume or perfume lotion. It always makes me feel prettier. Nail polish too. Make small changes that make you feel more feminine and prettier.

chocolate moose

Tue, Dec 08 2009, 11:49 am

Sometimes my nose bothers me too, but hey, I'm Jewish, not a shiksa with a little button nose. the alternative would be surgery, and if that backfires, you spend your while life with trouble.

sneakermom

Tue, Dec 08 2009, 11:58 am

No I don't like the way I look. I could look much better. But I would need to lose forty pounds, and get a sheital that is actually my color! Right now I am stuck with a brownish wig (long story) and my hair is black and I am dark. I hate the way that looks. I know I have potential to look great but somehow it doesn't happen.

I don't look bad though but it pains me cause I know how much better I could really look.

momomany

Tue, Dec 08 2009, 12:09 pm

I am happy with the way I look. I am not physically beautiful, but I am proud of the weight loss I have been maintaining for 4+ years & that gives me tremendous satisfaction with my body, even though each feature I have is not necessarily pretty.
I think feeling ugly or attractive is mostly something that comes from your mental/emotional state and less from your physical features or the clothes/wig you wear. Also, sometimes you will see a person with a particularly ugly feature, but their confidence, carriage & bearing make them attractive.

↑ amother ↓

Tue, Dec 08 2009, 1:11 pm

amother wrote:

to amother who wears a short synthetic wig.. if it makes you feel ugly why dont u get one you feel good in? a women is suppose to feel attractive

I would love if you can give me a source that a woman should feel attractive. I grew up with a different mindset from everyone around and it would be really helpful if I can read something about that.

Tefila ↓

Fri, Dec 25 2009, 1:07 am

B'h
Thats what husbands are for. Very Happy

They see the beauty in the oddest things imho Twisted Evil

and I don't bother correcting, just say Thank You because it does make one feel beautiful even if the mirror tells one differently.
Anyways I do believe we are too harsh on ourselves most women are beautiful!! Granted some more then others, however imho remember a smile not a sour face does wonderful things to ones features. Yes

familyfirst

Fri, Dec 25 2009, 1:19 am

To the mother who wants a source that a woman should look beautiful:

I don't have the source (though someone out there surely does) but the Lubavitcher Rebbe strongly encouraged woman to wear Sheitels that were Tzniyusdik, but beautiful. He felt it very important for Machon Chana Girl's Dormitory to have mirrors so that the students (adults) can take care of themselves and make themselves pretty.

Aren't the women praised with beautifying themselves for their husbands, and therefore their contributions to the Mishkan were special?

Granted, making oneself too attractive in an untzniusdike way is wrong, but doing so within the guidelines of Halacha, is not only ok, but actually encouraged.

↑ Tefila

Fri, Dec 25 2009, 2:06 am

amother wrote:

to amother who wears a short synthetic wig.. if it makes you feel ugly why dont u get one you feel good in? a women is suppose to feel attractive

Exactly familyfirst When the women in mitzrayim would try to have their husbands find favor in their eyes They would take brass like mirrors or something metal, and shine it and then bring it to their husband and alluringly say say look how beautiful I am.
That is why the mirrors were accepted in the mishkan and were regarded as holy!!!

Now what makes a women beautiful is all relative and imho a mindset! All women should feel beautiful even if text bookwise they are not. Besides text books are constantly updating and changing. What was deemed beautiful in the good ole days, nowaday would be deemed ugly, so there u have it Rolling Eyes

↑ amother

Fri, Dec 25 2009, 2:48 am

My dh always manages to tell me I'm so pretty when I really feel lousy about myself. Well, the one person I need to feel attracted to me , is - so I can live with that. I wish I didn't gain as much weight as I did with the last baby because it is just not coming off. I really feel prettier when I lose weight. Sometimes I get unwanted attention though, and it may be better that I need to lose weight and therefore not at my prettiest than to constantly be looked upon by strange men.

Ruchel

Fri, Dec 25 2009, 7:49 am

Tefila wrote:

amother wrote:

to amother who wears a short synthetic wig.. if it makes you feel ugly why dont u get one you feel good in? a women is suppose to feel attractive

The men didn't accept such a life and refused to have children. The women did it to make the Jewish people go on, which is why the mirrors were holy.

HindaRochel

Fri, Dec 25 2009, 7:52 am

No, not really. I've never liked the way I look. That's one of the reasons I don't like having myself photographed. I don't think I break the cameras, but I'm not beautiful...except to dh, which is where it counts.