any ideas?????? | Imamother

amother ↓

Sun, Nov 08 2009, 8:46 pm

I need a idea for my son 11 yr .from after supper till bed time he's so bored he just drives me crazy all night he has a game boy and his own computer and hes not intrested is there anything I can get him that he would be busy with?I open for any suggestion ?

imasinger

Sun, Nov 08 2009, 9:18 pm

Does he like to play games with other people? Read books? Play a musical instrument? Sometimes, if you can get them started, they go fine on their own.

Or you could use my mom's approach, and say, "If you can't find something of your own to do, I have some dishes that need washing, some garbage that needs taking out, and lots more -- to fill your time till bed."

↑ amother

Sun, Nov 08 2009, 9:46 pm

the problem is he would love to wash my dishes -but I like to do it on my own so thats out.
he has no patience to sit with a book he took casio lessons but was a waste of money.he has no patience.
I bought him a paint by # he had no patience for that puzzle too.

AlwaysGrateful

Sun, Nov 08 2009, 10:06 pm

amother wrote:

Can I suggest that you give him more responsibilities around the house? I understand that you like to wash your own dishes. Would it be worth it for you give that up if it raised your kid's self esteem? I'm not saying it necessarily will...just that it's worth a try.

And if that's for sure out, is there anything else you can ask him to do? Any "important job" that he can help with, that will actually help you (or someone else)? Kids who have chores may appreciate their free time even more, rather than being bored.

(This comes from someone who was never given chores growing up, often begged her parents to be able to help them, was never allowed in the kitchen...and was very, very often bored and hated having free time to fill. At least I liked to read and draw a bit...)

Hatemywig

Mon, Nov 09 2009, 6:33 am

I have the same thing with my son. I started a puzzle and every evening we spend time doing it together, it may take some time and alot of effort on your behalf but after a while he will for sure feel more accomplished and may even be motivated to do a puzzle on his own.

Happy Mom

Wed, Nov 11 2009, 12:31 am

amother wrote:

How much patience do you have for things that don't interest you?? It sounds like your son has an idea of what he likes, but it's different than what you want him to be busy with. Part of being a parent is that we have to be the grown up and make what's best for our kids our foremost agenda. And another very big and not so easy part is giving up our expectations of what our kids should be like.

If he wants to wash the dishes, let him! Not only will it keep him busy, he'll learn responsibility and feel great to be helping out. And if you let him continue, with a bit of time it really will become a help for you.

Imaonwheels

Wed, Nov 11 2009, 3:43 am

Thank HaShem that he is bored of the gameboy and computer and wants to wash dishes. If he washes them once and you do it again you've done it once. If only you do it you've done it once. You can do it together and show him how to do it properly. You will also earn yourself a happy dil some day. If he doesn't do it now he will not want to start when he's 13 and you need help.