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Forum
-> Yom Tov / Holidays
-> Purim
morningstar
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Wed, Mar 15 2006, 6:11 pm
Regarding giving- rather than preparing lots and lots of little ones, with stuff that people don't really want and feel frazzled at handling, it can be gratifying to just prepare two or three nice ones for friends, including things they can use and that you know they would really like.
And in my personal experience ( giving out many more mm's than I receive) the nice part is not having to deal with the post-Purim clean-up.
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chen
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Wed, Mar 15 2006, 6:16 pm
SaraG wrote: |
What do you do about people who kvetch that "they're a slave all day to the M.M"!
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Do about them? Why, nothing. Seems to me that that slavery is their choice.
Oh, you mean, what do I say to them? Something meaningless and soothing like " aww, that's too bad, but what you make is really gorgeous."
Sometimes a kvetch is not really a kvetch, it's a boast. ("Alas, my dh can't decide whether to accept the full scholarship to Columbia Law or accept the $500,000 -a-year job at Bear Sterns. either way we'll have to move to NY which I really don't want to do right now."
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chocolate moose
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Wed, Mar 15 2006, 6:28 pm
At this stage of my life, just preparing some kugel and salad for two friends is not really enhancing my Purim.
Everone else is out running around and I am stuck home watching it.
If my friends visited me, that's be fine....but they don't, they're busy with their kids and their own Purim.
Yes, I have less nosh to deal with, and less garbage to take out....it all translates to less fun, too.
Chen got it right!
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BrachaVHatzlocha
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Wed, Mar 15 2006, 6:33 pm
sarag --
here's a virtual shaloch manos for you: **@@PH
*use your imagination for that to be your favorite foods!*
By the way, don't stay home next year! don't worry about someone missing you -- it happens! and when you go give to someone, they usually give back.
also, your husband and kids - didn't they deliver some FROM the family...and got some back for the whole family??
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Mommy912
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Wed, Mar 15 2006, 6:38 pm
I don't know if this is your thing, but I went to an assisted living center to give Shalach Manos and it was pretty quiet there. I am sure they would have loved to see a happy purim face. Why not spend the day giving to people who are alone?
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morningstar
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Wed, Mar 15 2006, 6:44 pm
I actually got a call from a relative this Purim who was suffering from the "Purim Blues"-- and you are right, if you are not busy, it can feel like a real downer.
It is true that you have to give to get, but sometimes, when you are giving, you discover that the giving is better than the getting.
Visiting friends is good... visiting the lonely or inviting them to your house is good too.
Hope next Purim feels better for you.
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Mama Bear
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Wed, Mar 15 2006, 7:34 pm
I prepare seven mishloach monos a year: 2 great aunts, 2 grandparents, landlady, and 2 spares. Both spares disappeared this year because 3 internet friends showed up. I only get 2-4 m.m. a year and dont expect more.
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raizy
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Wed, Mar 15 2006, 7:43 pm
well it can happen that a friend prepares u something and it never arrives to your door. like one of my best friends . we met in the morning bye someone house to hear the megelah. and that when I gave her mine. but she was too frazzled with her kids andshe had an extra kid on her hands. well she called me up at 7:00p.m. and told me that she made me a m.m. but had no time to deliver it and do I still want it. I know she is preg adn tired adn lots of stress . I told her we will still be friends if u dont give me the m.m. just go and rest. so I say true friends dont need to give m.m. to remain friends. anyways we talked 3 times since then and we are still friends.!!
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lucky
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Wed, Mar 15 2006, 9:31 pm
I don't get it. Doesn't everyone send MM as a family? I don't get anything labeled for me. My stickers are 'Simchas Purim from xxxx and family'. The MM I get are labeled 'to xxxx and family.
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shalhevet
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Thu, Mar 16 2006, 12:42 am
Halachically, you have to send at least one MM from you (as in you alone) to one adult Jewish woman (and not to her whole family)
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queen
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Thu, Mar 16 2006, 5:08 am
Mommy912 wrote: | Why not spend the day giving to people who are alone? |
or in bound/elderly
will make your purim a lot nicer!!!!!
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queen
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Thu, Mar 16 2006, 5:10 am
chen wrote: | Sometimes a kvetch is not really a kvetch, it's a boast. ("Alas, my dh can't decide whether to accept the full scholarship to Columbia Law or accept the $500,000 -a-year job at Bear Sterns. either way we'll have to move to NY which I really don't want to do right now." |
(are you telling us something??????)
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Mommy912
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Thu, Mar 16 2006, 7:57 am
This year we picked a few people on our block whom we really don't know too well and just gave them Shalach Manos. You don't have to only give to your friends/rebbeim. You can go out and just knock on doors. It is a great day to make new friends.
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Mommy912
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Thu, Mar 16 2006, 8:00 am
chen wrote: | Sometimes a kvetch is not really a kvetch, it's a boast. ("Alas, my dh can't decide whether to accept the full scholarship to Columbia Law or accept the $500,000 -a-year job at Bear Sterns. either way we'll have to move to NY which I really don't want to do right now." |
Well, take the Bear Sterns job. It would be nice to have more frum people there working with me. They are really friendly - there is even a mincha minyan in the building.
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chocolate moose
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Thu, Mar 16 2006, 9:31 am
I have stickers "From the X FAmily", but I also have individual ones for each of us.
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downsyndrome
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Sat, Mar 18 2006, 10:33 pm
SaraG, can I divert some of my mm's in the future to your home? I am ashamed to say, right b/4 Shabbos I threw out so much food/junk that it felt horrible, but in all honesty, I did not want my family consuming all that nosh.
Am I being old-fashioned or something when I ask, What has happened to the good mm's of years back? Nobody is baking anymore, most of the mm's are packed with shehakol junk that is barely edible (oh yeah! I know the kids are in heaven when they review the bounty, but when they are asleep I do lots of 'censoring') and the day after Purim I am making bags full of nosh for my son's non jewish busdriver and matron, and for the mailman and for my Mexican housekeeper. I feel so sorry for all this yiddishe hard-earned money. Why don't people think? I got 3 mm's that took up half my dining room table, so laden were they with all types of packaged noshes. I'm sure each one cost between $50 - $150 and they ended up being distributed to non jews.
Any ideas for the future?
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amother
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Sat, Mar 18 2006, 11:08 pm
Rather than throwing out the nosh or giving it to non jews, see if you can donate it to a frum elementary school or yeshiva. The teachers at the elementary school can use it for parties or treats for the kids. The yeshiva bochurim will probably like a little nosh, too. Or see if there is a Jewish Family Services in your area that will accept food donations. Don't throw it out---what a waste!
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chocolate moose
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Sun, Mar 19 2006, 6:23 am
I am not complaining about the lack of nosh - I can go to the store and purchase whatever I want. I know the nosh thing is out of control. (Personally, I prepared a Bodek salad, inst. soup, applesauce, diet soda, and orange for those who came by, and for extras).
I mean I had no one coming to the door.
No one who thought enough of me to visit me. That's what's so hurtful.
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Mommy912
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Sun, Mar 19 2006, 6:30 am
SaraG wrote: | No one who thought enough of me to visit me. That's what's so hurtful. |
But who did YOU visit? This is a two-way deal.
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amother
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Sun, Mar 19 2006, 6:33 am
SaraG: at one point didn't you mention you only hand out 2. Perhaps this is why you didn't receive anything! People have probably come to expect nothing from you!
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