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-> The Social Scene
-> Chit Chat
proud2bajew
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Mon, Sep 21 2009, 7:14 am
This question is purely out of curiosity, not meant to judge in ANY WAY!!!
Why do chassidish woman hold that you only fast yom kippur and tishaa b'av? even the single girls?
thanks!
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First Lady
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Mon, Sep 21 2009, 8:32 am
Depends which Chassidus. And depends if the woman is pregnant or nursing.
Some like Skvere and Vizhnitz are extremely lenient for pregnant and nursing women.
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bubby
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Mon, Sep 21 2009, 8:46 am
proud2bajew wrote: |
Why do chassidish woman hold that you only fast yom kippur and tishaa b'av? even the single girls?
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Not in Lubavitch. I didn't know that. But again, if women have "conditions" like pregnant or nursing, or are on ongoing medications where food is needed (as I am) we don't usually fast. I don't take these meds YK or Tisha B'Av. Of course, people should ask a Rav if they're in doubt.
Having said that, I'm so stuffed I can do without eating today. And I'm going to the Ohel this morning so I won't eat anyway. So I'm not taking my meds
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Ruchel
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Mon, Sep 21 2009, 8:48 am
Nu... Dutch wait only 1 hour between meat and milk, (most) Sefardim eat kitniot on Pessach, and many chassidish groups hold women only fast tisha beav and Kippur.
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Ruchel
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Mon, Sep 21 2009, 8:52 am
No, not everyone can fast on YK. What a weird thing to say. Don't you know anyone sick?
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bubby
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Mon, Sep 21 2009, 8:52 am
Ruchel wrote: | Nu... Dutch wait only 1 hour between meat and milk, |
My uncle was Dutch, it was a riot! We were dying for a cup of tea (with milk, the English way) & he was chugging down the cheesecake for "dessert"!
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shalhevet
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Mon, Sep 21 2009, 8:52 am
Ruchel wrote: | Nu... Dutch wait only 1 hour between meat and milk, (most) Sefardim eat kitniot on Pessach, and many chassidish groups hold women only fast tisha beav and Kippur. |
One has nothing to do with the other. But if I write why I won't be popular around here. (Hint: the first two minhagim are in full accordance with the SA.)
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happyone
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Mon, Sep 21 2009, 8:53 am
It's not a general chassidish thing. Like another poster said, depends on the chassidus and condition, ie. pregnant or breastfeeding. By us, the girls fast, as do the woman unless there's a medical condition or high risk pregnancy.
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lilacdreams
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Mon, Sep 21 2009, 8:55 am
shalhevet, who said you're popular to begin with?
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First Lady
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Mon, Sep 21 2009, 8:55 am
shalhevet wrote: | Ruchel wrote: | Nu... Dutch wait only 1 hour between meat and milk, (most) Sefardim eat kitniot on Pessach, and many chassidish groups hold women only fast tisha beav and Kippur. |
One has nothing to do with the other. But if I write why I won't be popular around here. (Hint: the first two minhagim are in full accordance with the SA.) |
Nothing anyone will say can make me think differently about the certain Dayanim I know, who are mamesh Tzaddikim and are very lenient in women fasting. So write away!!
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First Lady
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Mon, Sep 21 2009, 8:56 am
lilacdreams wrote: | shalhevet, who said you're popular to begin with? |
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bubby
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Mon, Sep 21 2009, 8:58 am
Not fasting on YK is worse than fasting. I was in hospital just before YK a few years ago & I wasn't allowed to fast (my cardiologist is very frum & he told me.) The Rav told me to drink a shot glass of water every 9 mins & it was terrible. I had to go to Shul for Yizkor...the rest of the day I was home, swigging down the water & trying to daven in between trips to the bathroom. I'd rather have been in Shul, fasting.
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Ruchel
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Mon, Sep 21 2009, 8:59 am
shalhevet wrote: | Ruchel wrote: | Nu... Dutch wait only 1 hour between meat and milk, (most) Sefardim eat kitniot on Pessach, and many chassidish groups hold women only fast tisha beav and Kippur. |
One has nothing to do with the other. But if I write why I won't be popular around here. (Hint: the first two minhagim are in full accordance with the SA.) |
So many people won't believe it's actually ok for Dutch to wait one hour, including some "learned" rebbetzins. I had a whole drama about it, she wouldn't believe anything else than 6 hours was ok. I didn't let her do lashon hara on full communities of course.
I honestly don't know what's in the shulchan aruch or not about it. I'm not from a circle where women learn so much. I just say, it happens to be my minhag, so I keep it. There are also many people who don't respect it/won't believe it. I think there's a lot of ignorance or jealousy or both going on.
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Mama Bear
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Mon, Sep 21 2009, 8:59 am
I dont know. My father never let us fast. Neither does my husband. I dont even ask why, I'm just glad I don't. TB and YK are so hard, I cannot imagine being a normal mother to my kids whiile fasting another four times a year. It's just not posible.
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Ruchel
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Mon, Sep 21 2009, 9:01 am
Mama Bear wrote: | I dont know. My father never let us fast. |
THAT, exactly. My father and my mother's father are VERY VERY adamant women shouldn't fast.
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shalhevet
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Mon, Sep 21 2009, 9:07 am
lilacdreams wrote: | shalhevet, who said you're popular to begin with? |
I'll get you later, lilac.
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louche
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Mon, Sep 21 2009, 9:24 am
Incidentally, not all Dutch Jews wait 1 hour. I've known at least 4 frum people from different places in Holland, and only one of them even heard of waiting only 1 hour.
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Ruchel
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Mon, Sep 21 2009, 9:27 am
louche wrote: | Incidentally, not all Dutch Jews wait 1 hour. I've known at least 4 frum people from different places in Holland, and only one of them even heard of waiting only 1 hour. |
Yes, I meant Dutch minhag. Not all Dutch jews have the Dutch minhag. My great grandparents and uncles kept their (Salonika Sefardi minhag of 3h) minhag when they arrived in Netherlands. But many of those arrived generations and generations ago adopted it.
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Raisin
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Mon, Sep 21 2009, 9:46 am
Ruchel wrote: | louche wrote: | Incidentally, not all Dutch Jews wait 1 hour. I've known at least 4 frum people from different places in Holland, and only one of them even heard of waiting only 1 hour. |
Yes, I meant Dutch minhag. Not all Dutch jews have the Dutch minhag. My great grandparents and uncles kept their (Salonika Sefardi minhag of 3h) minhag when they arrived in Netherlands. But many of those arrived generations and generations ago adopted it. |
1 hour makes more sense halachically then 3 hours, according to what I have heard. And when I was in Amsterdam I was told is is common there to have dairy desserts at the end of a meat simcha, so it is obviously pretty common there.
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Ruchel
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Mon, Sep 21 2009, 9:49 am
I heard about the dessert thing but actually never saw it. What a dream!
As for 3 hours, it is the minhag in many Sefardic communities (in Greece, Italy, Bulgaria, North Morocca...) and also of many Yekkes and "related" (Alsatians etc). As well as Italkis and Romaniotes, two extremely old rites.
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