My toddler broke my nose

amother

Thu, May 02 2024, 7:06 pm

My child is very active and gets into everything. The last few weeks he has been having a lot of tantrums where he gets very angry and throws things etc. today he made a fist and deliberately hit me in my nose and it hurt so I I was like half crying and he hit me again . Is this normal? He’s 2. He lately keeps trying to hurt me . He kicked me hard in my head with a shoe and I got a big bump. He also bites me and slaps and scratches.He doesn’t do this to anyone else except for me. He never hurts my baby and in school He is super well behaved. How am I supposed to respond to this?

amother

Brass

Thu, May 02 2024, 7:25 pm

amother OP wrote:

Is he delayed in any area? Sometimes kids with a speech delay could act out in frustration of not being able to communicate and you're probably the one person he is trying to communicate with most. If not, maybe ABA or OT/sensory gym will help?

amother

Lotus

Thu, May 02 2024, 7:29 pm

Oy vey!
No advice for the behavior but years ago my toddler broke my nose (by accident). I took the opportunity to get a nose job so there’s a silver lining if that’s something you’ve always wanted Wink

amother

Thu, May 02 2024, 7:35 pm

amother Brass wrote:

no he’s actually very advanced

amother

Thu, May 02 2024, 7:45 pm

I really tried all the gentle methods and nothing has been working. When he broke my nose I was in too much pain to do anything except wiper but my husband was there and gave him a potch. He cried and literally as I’m standing there trying to deal with the blood he comes around and starts stamping on my toes (he does this all the time). Im at my wits end

amother

Yolk

Thu, May 02 2024, 7:50 pm

You need to sternly say no we don’t hurt people. And then move away from him. Say I can’t stay near you if you are going to hurt me. Look I have a big boo boo now and it hurts me.

mushkamothers

Thu, May 02 2024, 7:52 pm

amother OP wrote:

no he’s actually very advanced

This doesn't sound normal and you need an evaluation. It's probably not your parenting either. He could twice exceptional which means advanced in one area (usually cognitively) and delayed in another (usually social emotional)

amother

Wine

Thu, May 02 2024, 7:53 pm

amother OP wrote:

Do gentle parenting. After he's broken your nose a few times he'll learn I'm sure.

(You might need to suffer a broken arm and leg or to till he learns tho).

amother

Thu, May 02 2024, 8:04 pm

amother Yolk wrote:

You need to sternly say no we don’t hurt people. And then move away from him. Say I can’t stay near you if you are going to hurt me. Look I have a big boo boo now and it hurts me.

I’ve done that with the lesser injuries. No effect whatsoever. When he broke my nose I wasn’t in any condition to do any parenting- gentle or otherwise.

amother

Thu, May 02 2024, 8:05 pm

Sebastian wrote:

I would have him evaluated. you also need immediate consequences for hitting you imo. you are his mother not his punching bag.

evaluated by who? When he’s not tantrumming he’s a sweet darling who impressed everyone with his adorable looks and sweet baby voice talking like an adult

amother

Thu, May 02 2024, 8:09 pm

Sebastian wrote:

I would strap him in his crib/high chair/stroller and tell him if he hits he cant play with mommy

oh he knows how to come out of anything. He’s very advanced. He even learned how my child locks work and broke into my cabinets

amother

Teal

Thu, May 02 2024, 8:11 pm

My son was similar. We ended up putting in a Speacilast school even tho he wasn’t diagnosed. They were just way more capable of dealing with it all. Def start with a full evaluation. Get all the help u can. Def take some parenting classes. My son is now 10, he is still very active but a great kids he mainstreamed at 1st grade. Best thing I ever did

octopus

Thu, May 02 2024, 8:12 pm

amother Wine wrote:

Do gentle parenting. After he's broken your nose a few times he'll learn I'm sure.

(You might need to suffer a broken arm and leg or to till he learns tho).

This is such a rude response. I have a lot to say about evaluations and early intervention. But I am not sure if in this case Op will get if she says her child is very bright and she's not seeing any delays. Does he have any speech delays? He's displaying extraordinary aggressive behavior. I would not run to go the EI route I think I would go the ohel route. I think they have play therapy for young children for sliding scale. Maybe you can explore both routes at the same time so you don't waste any time. It takes a while to get the evaluation and all the reports and maybe in the meantime you could start somewhere else. Many times there are waiting lists for these clinics. Maybe call up and find out about it.Ohel is not the only place for these kinds of things. There is sefardic bikur holim. There is the Jewish board. And interborough. This is if you live in Brooklyn. At the same time you can call up any agency like challenge or strivrite or yeled vyalda and request an EI evaluation.

amother

Yolk

Thu, May 02 2024, 8:14 pm

amother OP wrote:

oh he knows how to come out of anything. He’s very advanced. He even learned how my child locks work and broke into my cabinets

Kids with asd and adhd can be very advanced in some areas and also impulsive and lacking understanding when it comes to cause and effect. They also tend to be escape artists get out of all straps and into all locks. He definitely needs a reevaluation with someone who specializes in this.

amother

Peachpuff

Thu, May 02 2024, 8:17 pm

amother Rainbow wrote:

Sounds like a psychopath. Maybe get him evaluated by a psychiatrist or child psychologist and get another opinion if they say nothing is wrong

I second this.
It's very concerning that he has no empathy. To see you bleeding and crying and hurt you again!