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Forum
-> Vacation and Traveling
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amother
Kiwi
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 Tue, Apr 02 2024, 1:29 pm
I have done a group vacation in a single shared house with just moms and kids, oldest boys being in third grade. That was fine. But it would have been too squishy a setup to have dads there too.
We do have couple friends and family friends, and I would love to vacation with some, but would not want to stay in a shared house. Nearby rooms in the same hotel or neighboring cabins or something like that would be fine. MO.
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amother
Navy
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Tue, Apr 02 2024, 1:31 pm
I am not yeshivish and I am shocked that yeshivish couples would do a group pesach vacation. Even in my JPF circles plenty of people would feel uncomfortable doing this. I have done short vacations sharing houses with siblings in law.
I do agree with your husband that it is really nice to have family friends and shabbos meals are a great tznius way to bring those friendships closer. Maybe make an effort to do that once in a while, for him.
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amother
Mintcream
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Tue, Apr 02 2024, 1:31 pm
With a hotel or separate little condos it’s different with non family members
I need my space too I get you 💯 - try giving in once in a while for a seuda we eat out a few times a year (my Dh is the social one I prefer my house)
With family sharing a big house makes sense obviously it’s completely different
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amother
Peony
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Tue, Apr 02 2024, 1:40 pm
| amother OP wrote: | | A few of my neighbors are renting a place together in Orlando for pesach (upper 20s low 30s). Dh is upset since that we aren't going since I hate doing things with other families. I think its awkward and uncomfortable to not have my own space for so long. In general he feels like we have no good family friends because I hate doing dates together or sudas... I have my own friends and he has his. Am I so wrong? I dont see the thrill in getting together with other families . I love being with dh and my kids I don't need more. Furthermore my seminary teachers spoke against these ideas we are yeshivish lakewood type ... I could totally see their point. I'm curious also if anyone on here has done such a vacation and what the reality is like |
This is yeshivish Lakewood?
I dont know anybody who does this with non family.
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tichellady
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Tue, Apr 02 2024, 1:49 pm
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It sounds like you have different needs and that’s ok. You don’t have to convince each other that one of you is wrong and one is right. You are different people and allowed to have different opinions and needs. You will have to reach a compromise and each go out of your comfort zone a little for the other one
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amother
Bisque
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Tue, Apr 02 2024, 3:44 pm
| amother Peony wrote: | This is yeshivish Lakewood?
I dont know anybody who does this with non family. |
This doesn't represent Lakewood yeshivish. No one I know in Lakewood would do this.
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amother
Crocus
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Tue, Apr 02 2024, 3:50 pm
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It's really unfortunate that frum couples do this. It's a recipe for trouble. I hope your husband understands that.
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amother
Purple
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Tue, Apr 02 2024, 4:12 pm
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It's disheartening to hear that this has become the norm. Family time is precious, and prioritizing friends over family during such a nice yt feels off. While having friends are wonderful , their are complexity involved. Our family is open minded but this trend doesn't sit well with me either . I'm not judging your husband, I don't know your family situation. Just giving my 2 cents. Hope you enjoy whichever way it turns out.
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amother
Nemesia
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Tue, Apr 02 2024, 4:16 pm
I guarantee you all these families are not Yeshivish.
I think OP has no clue what that term means and just said it for shockwaves.
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mha3484
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Tue, Apr 02 2024, 4:36 pm
| amother Bisque wrote: | | This doesn't represent Lakewood yeshivish. No one I know in Lakewood would do this. |
I am OOT Yeshivish. A lot more goes here within mainstream yeshivish circles then I think would in a place like Lakewood and no one I know would do this.
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amother
Midnight
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Tue, Apr 02 2024, 4:38 pm
| mha3484 wrote: | | I am OOT Yeshivish. A lot more goes here within mainstream yeshivish circles then I think would in a place like Lakewood and no one I know would do this. |
I'm not even yeshivish and no one in my circles would do this. It's asking for trouble. I think it's a young immature thing more than a yeshivish thing.
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amother
OP
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Tue, Apr 02 2024, 4:44 pm
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I guess yeshivish is a broad term. These families are young and trendy more open minded but kids are in bais yakov ect..
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amother
Cornsilk
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Tue, Apr 02 2024, 4:44 pm
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8 days with other couples is a highway ticket to wrecking your own Shalom Bayis.
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amother
Tan
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Tue, Apr 02 2024, 6:18 pm
| amother Sand wrote: | | I’ve done this with family but not for a whole pesach and I certainly cannot imagine doing it with non family members. |
I wouldn't even go with my sisters and their husbands, my brothers yes I would.
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amother
OP
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Tue, Apr 02 2024, 6:23 pm
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Wow! I'm glad to see I'm not the only one !!!
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amother
Yellow
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Tue, Apr 02 2024, 6:33 pm
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I’ve done it and regretted it every time.
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amother
Stoneblue
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Tue, Apr 02 2024, 9:04 pm
| hodeez wrote: | | Sounds like the opposite of a problem |
Loved this response 
Couldn’t agree more- it’s the opposite of a problem!
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amother
Nasturtium
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Tue, Apr 02 2024, 9:16 pm
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I go to Orlando for Pesach with my fam and am so disturbed whenever I see family friends sharing vacation homes. It’s a very laid back atmosphere where it’s challenging to keep to strict gedorim between men and women. Sharing the same living space in such an intimate, cozy way seems so not right. Everyone’s mingling in a very relaxed state.
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amother
Nemesia
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Tue, Apr 02 2024, 9:16 pm
| amother OP wrote: | | I guess yeshivish is a broad term. These families are young and trendy more open minded but kids are in bais yakov ect.. |
No, Yeshivish is not such a broad term, those people dont sound yeshivish at all.
Sending to BY is not what makes you Yeshivish. Theyre what people call JPF.
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