Making first bris | Imamother

amother

Yellow

Sun, Mar 31 2024, 7:15 pm

Sandakaus is the most choshuv.

How about if you give sandak to your father/FIL, have the other set of grandparents be kvatter.
When I lived in EY I saw people, especially my British neighbors, give kvatter to the baby's grandparents.

There are lots of kibbudim if you have lots of people to honor and you want to break it up, like meihakisei, etc.

Speak to your husband and the mohel.

amother

Mimosa

Sun, Mar 31 2024, 7:40 pm

amother OP wrote:

3 reasons I'm hesitant
1. They're elderly and I'd worry if they're capable
2. How would I choose one over the other
3. They had their opportunities, my father hasn't

I think your father should go first because there is something specific to be said about it going to those who haven’t had the opportunity. That’s the entire reason someone isn’t supposed to be sandek for siblings

And barring extenuating circumstances, it very typically goes to one of your fathers first, not a grandfather (which there’s a lot more to choose from usually as well)