Champagne Tastes? Spinoff from MyHabit has Venettinis

spinkles

Sun, Aug 24 2014, 11:16 am

Quote:

Maybe try buying cheaper shoes, because Venetinnis are NOT better quality so your girls may do just fine with those too (and you would be saving money)!

My rebbetzin said that for mothers like me, who think the whole gashmius obsession is stupid, it's important for us to make sure our kids have what the majority of other kids in their class have. She said it's something to really be careful about because feeling part of the group at that age is important to their development in ruchnius. Anyway, I guess how your shoes hold up is mazel, but like I said, my daughter's Venettinis that she wore every day for a year are in almost mint condition, so I'm happy to buy her another (sale) pair for this year.

PinkFridge

Sun, Aug 24 2014, 11:18 am

Scrabble123 wrote:

I grew up with brands, but I didn't know what brands were. My classmates all had brands, but it wasnt discussed in my private school. I'm not getting into the wealth aspect, but I believe that people with new money or no money are much more into discussing brands.

I got a new Kipling twice a year (rolling for school and shoulder for day camp). I don't even know what other bags the children had. No one discussed it. My parents bought me Kipling because it was a good sturdy, reliable brand. They use to buy my juicy clothing too, until it was sold to a public company and became less classy and made cheaply. I had several Chanel suits and shoes, but that did not mean anything to me. I didn't look at what others were wearing, the kids didn't discuss it, and I'm sure they don't remember what I was wearing either!

If Kipling was so sturdy, why couldn't it last for more than one year? What did you do with them after that?
ETA: I'm not trying to start any kind of class war, let people who have spend how they wish, kol hakavod, but I'm just frankly curious.

Scrabble123

Sun, Aug 24 2014, 12:30 pm

PinkFridge wrote:

My grandparents and parents just bought everything new for the school year: including brand new uniforms, pencil cases, calculators, backpacks, etc. even if the old stuff was still in good condition. We gave everything else aware to people who couldn't afford it. I actually remember trying to keep my things extra nice during the school year, because I knew that afterwards I would donate them to other children and I wanted them to stay in good condition for them.

My parents were not showy people at all either. They just felt that new things for a new year was important. A lot of times they were buy two backpacks, so that I can davka give one away just to teach me about giving. When tickle me elmo was popular (I believe I was 5) my father came home with ten of them. He said that he wanted to give 9 of them away to sick children, but I insisted on giving away the 10th as well. I didn't need anything, and I wasn't raised to need things either. That's actually why I find this obsession with brands in the frum community appalling, but I remind myself that not everyone is like that and that even if someone is obsessed with brands, it's probably a lack of chinuch and that they have other good qualities.

DrMom

Sun, Aug 24 2014, 1:01 pm

There are plenty of no-name, plain, well-constructed backpacks, shoes, etc. without resorting to brands which plaster their tags and labels across their merchandise. I always feel these companies should pay *me* rather than the other way around if they expect me to be their walking billboard.

Scrabble123

Sun, Aug 24 2014, 1:03 pm

DrMom wrote:

I always say this!! This is why my grandmother wouldn't buy items with obvious logos or words stating the company name. Actually, even seeing Benetton on a shirt irks me! Still, to each his/her own.

watergirl

Sun, Aug 24 2014, 2:15 pm

Ooc, for those who say that their ventinnis (how ever its spelled) last all year and are still in good shape - your kids feet dont grow until the following August? How can a child wear a pair of shoes all year, unless they are the special ones Hashem made for us in the midbar that grew with the feet? My kids feet grow all year, so I buy a few pairs of shoes each all year long.

out-of-towner

Sun, Aug 24 2014, 2:24 pm

All I can says that I was in a shoe store in Boro Park and was shocked that the most popular first shoe for babies was the Venneti. I get buying quality first shoes for a baby, but these were priced $70! How is that affordable for large families, especially when they won't last more than a few months? Because my daughter needs special shoes I am going to go to Nordstrom, and a decent pair at Nordstrom costs less than Vennetis!

dancingqueen

Sun, Aug 24 2014, 5:23 pm

ChutzPAh wrote:

Maybe there should be assemblies about gashmius instead of tznius once in a while.

I was thinking about this topic and I really feel a focus on name brands in clothes (though I've never heard of venetinis) is an unfortunate corollary of the over emphasis on what girls wear tzniut-wise. In other words the more we talk about what teenage girls wear, the more emphasis we put on it both with tzniut and actual clothes, and it becomes more and more important.

debsey

Sun, Aug 24 2014, 5:35 pm

dancingqueen wrote:

I feel like this happens for a different reason - we forbid and legislate so MUCH, the girls just want to express themselves with whatever is left. Since they can't wear bright clothes or patterns that are too eye-catching, all that's left is brands. I mean, how many variations on a charcoal gray, navy, black or brown schoolbag can there be? (yes my daughters' school legislates handbag and shoe color!)

Amelia Bedelia

Sun, Aug 24 2014, 6:03 pm

FYI, Venettini is not quality. It's an OK brand, with beautiful styles, similar to Atlanta Moccasins, but with a smaller price tag. I try to avoid buying it, but would purchase it on sale. Also, I was really pleased with the quality in the boys' styles. The girls' styles are mostly moccasins, thin leather, which tends to rip at the seams or separate from the soles. Also, since they're slip - on shoes, the children outgrow them quicker. The boys' shoes are chunkier and I find them to be much more durable, almost like the European or mainstream brands. It's a frum company, AFAIK.

Reality

Sun, Aug 24 2014, 6:05 pm

watergirl wrote:

My girls are in upper elementary and their feet aren't growing as fast anymore. My younger daughter I bought with the thick strap so she was able run well even though it was a little big on her. And they wore the same shoes from September to May. At the end of the year they wore the sneakers I had already bought them for the summer.

Scrabble123

Sun, Aug 24 2014, 6:21 pm

debsey wrote:

This would really be for a spinoff, but I also believe a lot of it is this desire to "be the same." People without money are pressured to compete with those who are middle class and are competing with the upper class who are to petting with the super rich, etc. etc. People do not need to all have the same items and there is nothing wrong with someone having more or less than you.

Some people are advised not to buy bigger houses so others won't be jealous? Um... Come on! What about teaching those who are jealous to be happy with what they have. If someone didn't buy something with borrowed / stolen money then let them enjoy it gezunterheit!

And no, children don't need to know how much things cost unless they are trying to save up for and buy it!

out-of-towner

Sun, Aug 24 2014, 6:25 pm

Scrabble123 wrote:

Yes, but when parents are financing their kid's every desire to "be like the rest of her class" with name brands that cost at least three times the price of a normal brand and the parents are getting scholarship money from the school, I have a big problem with that. When parents are being told that their kids are being bullied and that a designer backpack and shoes would solve the problem, then there are serious issues! And yes, I have heard this!

Scrabble123

Sun, Aug 24 2014, 6:30 pm

out-of-towner wrote:

I'm so confused where you are disagreeing with me.
People should not need to compete and be in the same in every area. Parents should not feel pressured to buy brands. It's a society issue together with a home chinuch problem. I also have a big problem with everything you wrote, so I'm not sure what you're arguing about?

I think this "being the same" leads to more issues than just the brands.... It's a serious issue.

debsey

Sun, Aug 24 2014, 6:33 pm

out-of-towner wrote:

it is not about buying designer shoes to stop bullying. As Scrabble said, there is a desire to "be the same" and if all the girls look like clones of each other - and one girl sticks out in a"nerdy" way, that MIGHT put a target on her back. So you work on helping a kid like that blend in with the group. Not everyone. Just a kid who really doesn't handle social pressure well.

Scrabble123

Sun, Aug 24 2014, 6:37 pm

debsey wrote:

Right. Parents cannot put their child in an impossible situation, it is just unfortunate that this is the social situation not only in many frum schools, but in many communities today. I don't really have a solution, but it's definitely something that can be addressed on different levels at home depending on the parents/child.