Serving your kids what they want during the yomtov meals

chocolate moose

Thu, Oct 12 2006, 1:07 pm

I was discussing this with a friend with all ages of kids.

You plan, shop and cook so you have a variety to serve, right?

So - what do you do if your kids only like a plain salad, or don't want to eat meat, only chicken?

Do you serve or offer "everything" at each meal, or do you expect them to eat what you have planned?

Annie

Thu, Oct 12 2006, 1:58 pm

I try and have something at the meal that my children will eat. With my one pickier eater that means I should have at least gefilte fish or squash kugle or corn kugle. For the other two, they'll usually eat some form of chicken and whatever kugle I'm serving.

chen

Thu, Oct 12 2006, 2:35 pm

"If ya ain't hongry fer bread-and-butta, ya ain't hongry!" -- attributed to Ma Kettle

"This kitchen is not a cafeteria"--attributed to my sister.

"Never be a slave to your children"--attributed to yours truly.

I most emphatically do NOT plan my meals around my children. Yes, every now and then I will prepare something special that is someone's favorite, but I am not now, nor do I ever intend to become, a slave to my children or their whims. If they're hungry, they'll eat what I'm serving. If they don't want what I'm serving, they're not hungry. If they skip the chicken or the soup or the kugel, so be it--but they have to have the vegetables. That I insist upon.

I must be getting lax in my old age, though. This past yomtov I let them get away with not eating the eggplant (but only because it was really good and there was more left for me). Wink

chocolate moose

Thu, Oct 12 2006, 2:36 pm

Oh, Annie, I'd get more complaints than that, specially from my kids who are older teens (17 and almost 19)!

I just don't know what to do....I takeh made DS his own salad and his own fish this time. I didn't much want to, but if it makes him happy and keeps him quiet....

Guess it wouldn't kill me to shove a piece of chicken that he prefers into the pot of brisket warming up...it isn't like I'm heating everything up for EVERY single meal and we'd ALL get sick of the food...

happymom

Thu, Oct 12 2006, 2:52 pm

I dont think making what ure kids like is being a slave to your children. ure making food anyway so if theres a dish u KNOW they like, so what?

jewgal84

Thu, Oct 12 2006, 2:57 pm

happymom wrote:

I dont think making what ure kids like is being a slave to your children. ure making food anyway so if theres a dish u KNOW they like, so what?

Definately agree.

And more than that, your kids are your priority, so plan your menue accordingly and don't look at it as a shlep, rather your pleasure!

I'd rather satisfy my childrens appetite then making shmantzy dishes for other people Wink

mimsy7420

Thu, Oct 12 2006, 3:00 pm

jewgal84 wrote:

happymom wrote:

I dont think making what ure kids like is being a slave to your children. ure making food anyway so if theres a dish u KNOW they like, so what?

And it's probably easier to satisfy childrens appetites then making 5 course meals for dh or guests. At least with kids you can make them 1 or 2 things and thats it, with guests and other people theres always pressure to have such a selection "just in case".

chen

Thu, Oct 12 2006, 3:18 pm

only1 wrote:

[At least with kids you can make them 1 or 2 things and thats it, with guests and other people theres always pressure to have such a selection "just in case".

Multiply 1 or 2 things by how many kids, and you get...?
Here's what we observed at a recent meal at a friend's house:

Shimmy eats only plain boiled chicken and orange juice. Rikky won't eat anything red and breaks out from citrus. Jed eats only Cheerios and bread-and-butter, Sammy has gone vegetarian (this week), Ayelet won't touch vegetables or fruit of any kind. Chava is on a diet and won't eat anything except diet soda and celery, and Sol, the dad, whose father owned a deli, refuses to eat "grass" and only likes cold cuts.

Guess whom I am not inviting over any time soon?

Annie

Thu, Oct 12 2006, 3:53 pm

so, including *something* that each of my kids will eat is very different than cooking 20 different things for guests. When I go out (with my picky eater), I don't assume there will be anything to eat. When I cook for company, I try and always balance protein, starch and veggies. If I know I have a vegetarian, or Israelis that prefer savory to sweet, then I'll adjust accordingly.

On a regular dinner night in my house, we have one dinner, and then a couple of "you can always have" options -- a bowl of cereal or yogurt.

Raisin

Thu, Oct 12 2006, 4:29 pm

jewgal84 wrote:

happymom wrote:

I dont think making what ure kids like is being a slave to your children. ure making food anyway so if theres a dish u KNOW they like, so what?

If I did that we'd have: Macaroni and cheese, peanut butter sandwiches and cereal. (easy enough...maybe I'll do it. Who cares about the guests!)

b'h I don't have any really picky eaters, they tend to think that if Mummy and Tatty are eating something it must be good. My son does get upset if we don't have chummous at the shabbos meal.

amother

Thu, Oct 12 2006, 4:36 pm

If ur not preparing food ur kids and husband like who are u preparing for?
I generally cook simple dishes cause thats what gets eaten by dh and my kids , and when we have company , I will make fancier dishes to accomadate the guests but my main focus is to feed my kids and thats why I will think before inviting guests as I like to cook to impress but not at the expense of my dh and kids tastes.

chocolate moose

Thu, Oct 12 2006, 4:37 pm

That reminds me.....

Pesach time, when I would take out the gold and white china for DH and myself, with the matching gold flatwear, my kids (who were really really small at tht time) didn't want to eat with a plastic plate and fork!

They wanted what WE had!

However, anonymous amother, sometimes the kids don't decide they don't want/like someting until it's already the first or 2nd seudah. THEN there's a problem! specially if I have 5 Tuppewrwares of it in the freezer already.....

Marion

Thu, Oct 12 2006, 4:46 pm

If I cooked only for DH then all we'd ever eat is chicken and rice. I like fancier food, never mind the company. Or at least a little bit of variety!

busymom

Thu, Oct 12 2006, 8:34 pm

I married one of those picky eaters whose mother always catered to his whims. guess what? I DO NOT APPRECIATE IT! e/o can dislike one of two foods or dishes, but when the list goes on and on... it get's pretty frustrating!
if a child ever disliked s/t in my mil' house, she would pick that thing off his plate forever after. you can be sure, all the wives have a hard time feeding her sons. and limiting foods also limits the nutrients they get.
personally, I keep putting the same things on my kids plates - even those that they claimed to despise - and insist that they must TASTE everything, but only finish what they choose. some time goes by and eventually they learn to like most things. by continuing to serve kids only what they decided to eat at age 3 or 4, they never get a chance to experiment with dif foods that they may one day grow to love.

melalyse

Thu, Oct 12 2006, 8:48 pm

Certain things I would always be accomodating to whether it is my kid or a guest. It is a common thing not to eat red meat. I usually have both a red meat dish and a chicken dish. And plain salad is not so difficult - just leave off the dressing.
Growing up my mom would always ask us what we wanted for shabbos. my brother in law doesn't like fish so when they are over my mom makes something else for an apetizer for him.
I usually make 3-4 side dishes so even if someone only likes 1 they are still okay.
Also as kids get bigger they can take care of certain things themselves like the plain salad.

chocolate moose

Thu, Oct 12 2006, 9:33 pm

It's a toss up between the kids ruining the yomtov for me by kvetching, or for me catering to them which I see is bad chinuch.

The main problem is ON Shabbos or yomtov itself, if the kid decides he or she doesn't like how something came out...

Tefila

Fri, Oct 13 2006, 1:45 am

I have each of my son prepare a dish wether it's a salad that they like or a cake or soup etc (don't worry I still have what to cook LOL

)And this way they were part of it so they enjoy eating it.

Otherwise we have days when each child gets to choose a supper and evryone has to eat it. Otherwise chen I am not so kind as to offer bread and butter I will just offer bread and water. Twisted Evil

Well my kids nor I have resorted to that method yet. As you can tell we eat what our kids eat. Though I try to incorporate an additional special dish my husbands loves at each yom tov meal.

shopaholic

Fri, Oct 13 2006, 9:19 am

There are lots of interesting salads out there but I know that I & the kids won't eat them. Same goes for main dishes. I don't make steaks or lamb chops or any of those kind of meats cuz only DH will eat them. I try & make things that we will all finish off after Shabbos if there are leftovers. Also, I need the kids to eat so I try & make things they like.