Survey for Working Women

amother

Thu, Apr 15 2010, 8:02 pm

SavtaHelen

Thu, Apr 15 2010, 8:17 pm

1) What positive messages do you tell yourself that make you feel happy about going to work?
I am providing a service and helping people. I am using my skills and talents to make other people's lives easier
2) How do you fit in davening to your work schedule?
oh...that's a hard one. In my ideal situation I get up at six, walk for an hour, come home, shower and daven...In my worst moments I say "birkot haShachar" in the living room before dashing out the door.
3) How do you faithfully fulfill your obligations to your employer and not allow personal/family responsibilities to infringe on your work time?
I think my borders are rather flexible..I get calls from my kids at work and calls from work at home, and it just "flows"
4) How do you remain a nurturing wife and mother when you are busy with so many responsibilities?

I know my kids come first. When they were younger, even if they weren't really so ill, I would stay home with them when they were sick. I felt that five years from now no one at work would remember that I had been away but my kid would remember that feeling of abandonment. (I am talking about 13 years old and up)
5) You're at work and a child calls that he's sick. What do you do? And what if he's sick for a week with the chicken pox? Kid comes first. If I can't get out of something at work, call DH.

6) When you're alone and your thoughts drift, are you usually thinking about yourself, your family, or about work?
every day and every minute something else....cooking, shopping lists, grandkids, DH...chores, lists, hopes dreams, sometimes all within 60 sec!

7) What healthy balance have you developed about sharing your personal life with your coworkers? I am usually very open and sharing and my nature is to share humorous stories about the family
Back to top [I]

amother

Thu, Apr 15 2010, 8:26 pm

not sure if you wanted each question answered individualy, but I'll try to answer everything in some way....
I love getting up in the morning and going to work, I have a purpose in my day, a goal. It may or may not be the most amazing job, but it gives me a structure to my day.
No, after having a child and working full time, I dont usually daven, but I feel like my roll as a mother and wife take that place. I will rather spend the time with my child or prepare dinner then run to daven mincha. (I could be totally wrong, but this is how I feel)
When I am at work, as long as I have work, I will work. And I work hard. But if something in the family comes up, or my child needs something, that is number one.(obviously within reason) From my years of working I have learned that you need to set the standards. A boss will take advantage as much as they can, but you have to do what is right for yourself and FAMILY ALWAYS COMES FIRST.
I have many sisters and sisters-in-law some of which work and some who don't. Let me tell you, the ones that work have the most time to take care of their responsibilities, and help others, and be the best mothers. The ones who dont work, just shlep everything all day cuz they dont have to get things done on a tight schedule.
All of this is aside from that fact that its a great feeling that you can bring some money to the table at the end of the week. And when a friend may have time to spend all day, you are working and making money all day and contribute:)
I rarely drift off thinking of work.......
And last, I have built some of my most meaningful relationships with co-workers. there is so much to be said about being able to discuss daily issues and accurances with others(other than husband) and get good handy dinner tips or menus.
I am so glad I work, and I think my family is the happiest this way!

Mrs Bissli

Fri, Apr 16 2010, 4:46 am

1. I get good salary, also get professional recognition and work with bright people.
My days are filled with intellectual challenges, and sometimes get to visit interesting places.
I can make myself a cup of tea which I can enjoy while still hot without being interrupted
by my family (IIIIMMMMAAA, I want you NOW, please!?).
2. Get up early (though I admit not necessary). After lunch (at the desk) I bentch at the desk.
3. I do not speak with children on the phone during work hours as we're in an open office and I don't
want everyone eavesdropping and my assistant can be picking up phones on my behalf.
Mostly send texts or emails to DH. Most other things--doctors appointment,
teachers meetings can be accomodated either before or after work.
(Ok, restricting surfing on imamother to during the lunch time/slow hours count as well?)
4. I switch off/on easily. Delegate, multi-task, priortise (another way of saying slack off).
Having a short commute is a plus (if I catch a cab I can be home/at school from office in 20min max).
Having a good support system (supportive and flexible DH, reliable and capable nanny and cleaner) is
a must.
5. Either nanny or DH pick up. Nanny/DH stays with the child.
I'm rationing my paid holidays. Though my company is flexible to some degree (eg working from
home).
6. All of the above, and none of the above (like, what to serve for shabbat, what clothings need to be
mended) Usually I'm too busy taking care of chores to have time to let my thoughts drift.
7. I'm usually a rather private person, not into sharing personal life as I'm the only
working mother in my department (acutally the whole company at a senior level).It' almost having
a parallel universe as my work life and private life has very very little overlap. Thugh I have enough
conversational topics for chit chat.

Marion

Fri, Apr 16 2010, 5:43 am

1) What positive messages do you tell yourself that make you feel happy about going to work?
I'm keeping my children fed and a roof over their heads.

2) How do you fit in davening to your work schedule?
Does Modeh Ani on the way to daycare with the kids and kriat Shema at bedtime count?

3) How do you faithfully fulfill your obligations to your employer and not allow personal/family responsibilities to infringe on your work time?
That's what vacation time is for...if I have to take personal time I take personal time.

4) How do you remain a nurturing wife and mother when you are busy with so many responsibilities?
Do I have a choice?

5) You're at work and a child calls that he's sick. What do you do? And what if he's sick for a week with the chicken pox?
Depends what time it is. I have a 1.5 hour window to pick up a sick child. If necessary I have a couple of backup people who can take them. Sick for a week? Well, the law allows me to use a certain amount of my paid sick leave for a sick child, so that's what I would do.

6) When you're alone and your thoughts drift, are you usually thinking about yourself, your family, or about work?
Sleep.

7) What healthy balance have you developed about sharing your personal life with your coworkers?
I have pictures on my wall of my kids. My coworkers have all met my kids at one or another company event. They ask, I share. Some are older and wiser and I'll ask advice too for certain things. My marriage, OTOH, is off limits. But not my kids.

mosma

Fri, Apr 16 2010, 6:05 am

Working Woman Survey:
(I work from home for most of my work (not all of it) so my answers may be a bit different)
1) What positive messages do you tell yourself that make you feel happy about going to work?
I am making money for my family and if not for my job we would have no food...
2) How do you fit in davening to your work schedule?
Brachos in the morning and shema at night. That's all I really have time for...
3) How do you faithfully fulfill your obligations to your employer and not allow personal/family responsibilities to infringe on your work time?
I sometimes have to stop if something important comes up, but there are certain things I must do during the day, no matter how long it takes, so I just need to make sure I get them done at the end.
4) How do you remain a nurturing wife and mother when you are busy with so many responsibilities?
This is a tough one because I have 2 jobs and they're both very time consuming. I DO NOT WORK for the 2 hours my son comes home from school until he goes to bed, but once he's in bed I begin work again and make supper when I'm done and spend some time with DH. We are used to eating dinner at 9 pm now and it's worth it to stay up late because of the time we get to spend together.

5) You're at work and a child calls that he's sick. What do you do? And what if he's sick for a week with the chicken pox?
This is really n/a because I work from home so I can leave whenever I need to. I teach as well but that's only an hour a day. Once I had to pick up DS sick from school in middle of teaching (emergency) so I just left work for the girls to do and left. Frum schools are pretty understanding about mommies Very Happy

6) When you're alone and your thoughts drift, are you usually thinking about yourself, your family, or about work?
Lately I'm thinking about how little money we have and how to budget the week and still afford food for shabbos...But I try to have bitachon and when that balances out in my mind I usually think about DH and how things are going for him while I'm working.

7) What healthy balance have you developed about sharing your personal life with your coworkers?
Since most of my coworkers are working from their own homes, we don't speak every day. I have 2 or 3 coworkers that I'm closer to than others and when we speak for work if there's time we usually spend a minute or two talking about how we're doing.

amother

Fri, Apr 16 2010, 7:40 am

1) What positive messages do you tell yourself that make you feel happy about going to work?

As the primary breadwinner, I'm supporting myself and DH. If it weren't for my job, we wouldn't be able to support ourselves.

2) How do you fit in davening to your work schedule?

I get up earlier for shacharit. For mincha, there is no place to daven so I usually go outside to the parking lot.

3) How do you faithfully fulfill your obligations to your employer and not allow personal/family responsibilities to infringe on your work time?

At my job, there is more of an emphasis on getting your work done rather than sitting at your desk for exactly eight hours. So as long as I get my work done, I don't mind running to toivel some dishes on my lunch hour or calling DH to deal with a problem while I'm at work.

4) How do you remain a nurturing wife and mother when you are busy with so many responsibilities?

I always come home and make dinner for myself and DH. Not a mother yet.

5) You're at work and a child calls that he's sick. What do you do? And what if he's sick for a week with the chicken pox?

We don't have children yet, but I do have sick time I can use to take care of a family member.

6) When you're alone and your thoughts drift, are you usually thinking about yourself, your family, or about work?

Usually about myself, DH, politics, religion, what I have to do when I get home, my family, Shabbos dinner menus, etc. etc. Not too much about work.

7) What healthy balance have you developed about sharing your personal life with your coworkers?

I share very little. I work in a non-Jewish environment and my coworkers are pretty gossipy. I don't want to participate in that.

mamommommy

Fri, Apr 16 2010, 8:01 am

1) What positive messages do you tell yourself that make you feel happy about going to work?
That I contribute to the financial survival of my household and my children. That I have talents that Hashem allows me to share with others. That my work helps other people.

2) How do you fit in davening to your work schedule?
Same as I fit it in when I'm home with kids all day- whenever I get a second!

3) How do you faithfully fulfill your obligations to your employer and not allow personal/family responsibilities to infringe on your work time?
This answer probably depends on the nature of your job. For me, personal/family responsibilities always trump my job, but my work schedule is flexible certain days, so it rarely is a huge conflict.

4) How do you remain a nurturing wife and mother when you are busy with so many responsibilities?
I try very hard (not always successfully) to block my time. Meaning that I do not speak to anyone about work or attempt to do work in the afternoons/evening when my kids are around, and in the evenings I give myself a specific chunk of time to do work, a specific chunk of time for the home, and also a chunk of time for my dh. (Dh does the same thing, so we know, for example, that we're both unavailbale and working from 9-11 at night.)

5) You're at work and a child calls that he's sick. What do you do? And what if he's sick for a week with the chicken pox?
Again, my hours are sometimes flexible. Sometimes I have to take pay cuts, sometimes dh has to stay home.

6) When you're alone and your thoughts drift, are you usually thinking about yourself, your family, or about work?
Thoughts?

7) What healthy balance have you developed about sharing your personal life with your coworkers?
Depends on who they are. I've become good friends with some frum co-workers, so I share a lot. I'll share info like family birthdays, trips, shopping advice etc. with other people, but that's usually it - nothing personal unless it's one of my good friends

chocolate moose

Fri, Apr 16 2010, 8:07 am

amother wrote:

1) What positive messages do you tell yourself that make you feel happy about going to work?

I like people so I’m happy to get up and out each day.

amother wrote:

2) How do you fit in davening to your work schedule?

I daven before I go; what’s the big deal ?

amother wrote:

3) How do you faithfully fulfill your obligations to your employer and not allow personal/family responsibilities to infringe on your work time?

Boss knows he hired a working mom; I work by the year not the minute so it’s all good.

amother wrote:

4) How do you remain a nurturing wife and mother when you are busy with so many responsibilities?

I think multitasking is a muscle that gets stronger as you use it.

amother wrote:

5) You're at work and a child calls that he's sick. What do you do? And what if he's sick for a week with the chicken pox?

DH and I take turns.

amother wrote:

6) When you're alone and your thoughts drift, are you usually thinking about yourself, your family, or about work?

Depends.

amother wrote:

7) What healthy balance have you developed about sharing your personal life with your coworkers?

I do as they do. No more and no less.

amother

Fri, Apr 16 2010, 8:15 am

1) Since I was out of work for a while when I wasn't well my attitude towards even the most boring mundane things changed. I am happy and blessed to be able to go out & work. BH!

2) I talk to Hashem all day (not loudly of course, LOL).

3) I accept calls only on my work number. My cell gets shut off as soon as I come into work.

4) I think the key to this is the art of transitioning. When I leave the office I leave all the pressure and responsibilities right there. I unwind with my kids for approx a half hour after I leave work & that usually gets me into the family mode.

5) I get permission to leave immediately. My priority is my family.

6) depending what's most pressuring & unstable at that moment.

7) We talk a bit about our childrens' developments, latest antics and sometimes about myself, DH & my extended family but never information that I wouldn't announce on a loudspeaker.

amother

Fri, Apr 16 2010, 8:43 am

Working Woman Survey:

1) What positive messages do you tell yourself that make you feel happy about going to work?

-I am earning money for my family, which will hopefully make my marriage and whole family stay stable IY"H - that is really a tremendous gift to give to ones children. I try to tell my friends this, but not everyone gets what I am talking about.

-Also, I am happy to get out of the house and do something productive. I find that my hobbies such as exercise and going to shiurim fit into my schedule to the same extent that they would if I were a stay at home mom.

2) How do you fit in davening to your work schedule?

-I daven on the subway on the way into work - I have exactly enough time for Shacharis and a little extra tefilla. It's allowed, see Rav Nissel's book on women and prayer, called Rigshei Lev.

3) How do you faithfully fulfill your obligations to your employer and not allow personal/family responsibilities to infringe on your work time?

-I try to keep an open dialogue with my boss concerning how I am doing at work.

-I try to do all my work in a professional and timely fashion, even if it means occasionally working on Sunday or working late. B"H my husband is extremely understanding and accommodating about this.

-I keep in mind at all times that parnassah comes from Hashem and I just need to do my best, but I don't need to go overboard working. For example, I work hard, but I have some other friends that constantly travel for business. I do not want to travel for business because I think it is extremely damaging to the family unit. I have bitachon that Hashem can provide my parnassah without my needing to take on tasks that would require business travel.

4) How do you remain a nurturing wife and mother when you are busy with so many responsibilities?

-I just try to do my best. My kids are little now and they don't seem to have any existential crisis with my working. I try to outsource a lot of mundane household tasks like laundry, cleaning, shopping, so that when I come home I can spend time right away with my kids. I also try to hire excellent babysitters.

-I think that the "nurturing wife" part is often overlooked by many women. It is very important to hire a babysitter and go out with ones husband as often as you can afford. I left my kids with my parents for a few days and took a vacation with my husband - it may have been the best thing I ever did in my life.

5) You're at work and a child calls that he's sick. What do you do? And what if he's sick for a week with the chicken pox?

-B"H this doesn't happen very often. I have a babysitter in my home and a lot of extended family nearby. That being said, if I am needed, I will go home and take care of my child.

6) When you're alone and your thoughts drift, are you usually thinking about yourself, your family, or about work?

-I usually think about chores, like what am I making for Shabbos meals, or what do I need to do on Sunday. I also think about big-picture issues like buying a house, or even bigger picture hashkafa issues. I like the subway ride home, when I can just chill out by myself and read the Wall Street Journal - it's a good springboard for intellectual thoughts.

7) What healthy balance have you developed about sharing your personal life with your coworkers?

-I don't have that many "friends" at work, but I am pretty open with people if they ask me about my family or my religion. I feel that many of the women in my firm are either jealous of me for having a family or jealous of my being frum. They feel like a frum marriage is more stable or that a frum community provides more direction. As a result of this I am basically not a participant in the social events, and I never go out with my coworkers as a group. That being said, I am an open person by nature, so if someone asks me something, I usually answer honestly.

Back to top

amother

Fri, Apr 16 2010, 8:46 am

amother wrote:

Can you take a moment to answer these questions? I'm doing a survey and will use any answers you provide as part of a printed article/research to appear in a magazine IY"H. Thanks so much!

Working Woman Survey:

1) What positive messages do you tell yourself that make you feel happy about going to work?

I'm helping support our family. I am lucky to have this job!

2) How do you fit in davening to your work schedule?

I don't usually daven but I work from home so I could fit it in if I was more disciplined. (I have heard many times you can daven maariv if you don't have time for shacharis or mincha)

3) How do you faithfully fulfill your obligations to your employer and not allow personal/family responsibilities to infringe on your work time?

you do the best you can and when u need to take a personal call you have figure the employer assumes there will be some personal/family responsibilities that infringe on work time- there is no way around it. hope for an understanding boss, just don't take advantage.

4) How do you remain a nurturing wife and mother when you are busy with so many responsibilities?

this is tough, a constant juggle, but usually there is a positive side to working that "outweighs" this, for example, your family needs the money to survive, or you need the outlet to survive.

5) You're at work and a child calls that he's sick. What do you do? And what if he's sick for a week with the chicken pox?

I'm the one who misses work. my dh could also if needed.

6) When you're alone and your thoughts drift, are you usually thinking about yourself, your family, or about work?

usually my family.

7) What healthy balance have you developed about sharing your personal life with your coworkers?

I don't share too much. they know basics about my kids or cute tidbits, but I don't share every aspect of my life. TMI

groisamomma

Tue, Apr 27 2010, 8:00 am

amother wrote:

Can you take a moment to answer these questions? I'm doing a survey and will use any answers you provide as part of a printed article/research to appear in a magazine IY"H. Thanks so much!

Working Woman Survey:

1) What positive messages do you tell yourself that make you feel happy about going to work?

That I am supporting a husband in learning and that makes it worth it.

2) How do you fit in davening to your work schedule?
I do it in the car on the way to school, in the morning when my kids are out to school/playgroup, or skip it. I should really make more of an effort to change this, but I'm so busy, busy, busy (and I don't mean being on imamother)

3) How do you faithfully fulfill your obligations to your employer and not allow personal/family responsibilities to infringe on your work time?
I don't. When I take on too much at home, my work suffers.

4) How do you remain a nurturing wife and mother when you are busy with so many responsibilities?
I try to give special time to the kids individually, I always hold them at least once or twice a day and tell them I love them whenever I'm near them, I try to involve them in accomplishing some of the responsibilities, and sometimes I simply feel that I am not nurturing enough because I'm so busy (that's the simple, honest truth Crying

).

5) You're at work and a child calls that he's sick. What do you do? And what if he's sick for a week with the chicken pox?
I run home. I stay home from school till 2:00 when dh takes over for his lunch break till I come home from school. It happens to work out for us, cuz my school is ok with these things usually.

6) When you're alone and your thoughts drift, are you usually thinking about yourself, your family, or about work?
Sometimes all, sometimes none. Mostly I think ahead to everything I have to do for each...

7) What healthy balance have you developed about sharing your personal life with your coworkers?
I'm terrible here cuz I love to schmooze. But I don't share anything MAJORLY personal such as stuff about dh, only about the kids mostly.

amother

Tue, Apr 27 2010, 8:21 am

amother wrote:

Working Woman Survey:

1) What positive messages do you tell yourself that make you feel happy about going to work?

The company I work for does worthwhile and important things. My work enables this to continue.

amother wrote:

2) How do you fit in davening to your work schedule?

Not as much as I would like. Most days it is Brochos, and tehillim when I can squeeze that in.

amother wrote:

3) How do you faithfully fulfill your obligations to your employer and not allow personal/family responsibilities to infringe on your work time?

My employer is family friendly, so sometimes family infringes on work time, and sometimes I have to take work home to complete it.

amother wrote:

4) How do you remain a nurturing wife and mother when you are busy with so many responsibilities?

By excluding almost everything else. It is a constant struggle - I am not always successful.

amother wrote:

5) You're at work and a child calls that he's sick. What do you do? And what if he's sick for a week with the chicken pox?

Thank Hash-m it doesn't happen often. My in-laws are often able to help with a middle of the day problem. Several days would mean I take vacation time.

amother wrote:

6) When you're alone and your thoughts drift, are you usually thinking about yourself, your family, or about work?

Any of the above, but it works both ways - I sometimes think about work at home.

amother wrote:

7) What healthy balance have you developed about sharing your personal life with your coworkers?

Limiting it to light and positive as much as possible, unless they have a difficulty that sharing would help with.

tryinghard

Tue, Apr 27 2010, 8:43 am

amother wrote:

I am doing what I need to do to enable dh to be learning for the next few years. Also, I am currently working with elderly people, so I remind myself I am helping them, making them happy.

Quote:

2) How do you fit in davening to your work schedule?

I generally end up davening in the car embarrassed

Quote:

3) How do you faithfully fulfill your obligations to your employer and not allow personal/family responsibilities to infringe on your work time?

by showing up in a (relatively) timely fashion and not leaving early, by limiting personal calls to my lunch hour, and by trying my best to not miss work.

Quote:

4) How do you remain a nurturing wife and mother when you are busy with so many responsibilities?

when I am at work, I am at work, but I leave it there.

Quote:

5) You're at work and a child calls that he's sick. What do you do? And what if he's sick for a week with the chicken pox?

I have never dealt with this yet because dd is only 4 months. I would probably work something out with dh, where I would miss minimal time (afternoon seder is not until 3, and if necessary, it's not crazy for dh and chavrusa to learn at home) because I am doing an internship, and since I already took a lot of time off because I had a baby in the middle, it would be really bad if I miss more time

Quote:

6) When you're alone and your thoughts drift, are you usually thinking about yourself, your family, or about work?

definitely not work. usually family, things I have to do, things dh and I are talking about

Quote:

7) What healthy balance have you developed about sharing your personal life with your coworkers?

I will discuss dd, or funny things that happened, but nothing I wouldn't tell an old friend from high school - plus, none of my coworkers are frum, so of course there are a lot of things that I wouldn't talk about. I just generally try to participate in conversations without comprimising on propriety or my privacy.

amother

Tue, Apr 27 2010, 10:04 am

amother wrote:

3) How do you faithfully fulfill your obligations to your employer and not allow personal/family responsibilities to infringe on your work time?
I work for a parent so my hours are flexible(altho I need to put in a certain amount of hours), so that's not really a problem.

4) How do you remain a nurturing wife and mother when you are busy with so many responsibilities?
It's not easy

5) You're at work and a child calls that he's sick. What do you do? And what if he's sick for a week with the chicken pox?
I would be able to pick him up and bring hime with me to work.

6) When you're alone and your thoughts drift, are you usually thinking about yourself, your family, or about work?
myself

7) What healthy balance have you developed about sharing your personal life with your coworkers?

My coworkers are a parent and a friend, so they do know e/t about my kids, yet I still maintain my boundaries. I don't discuss my mariiage obviously

JuliaB

Tue, Apr 27 2010, 10:16 am

Working Woman Survey:

1) What positive messages do you tell yourself that make you feel happy about going to work?

I am being a responsible parent by getting a degree/being able to support our family. It helps give my days structure.

2) How do you fit in davening to your work schedule?

Not so well. embarrassed

3) How do you faithfully fulfill your obligations to your employer and not allow personal/family responsibilities to infringe on your work time?

I just do my job. If I feel I need to take time off for personal/family responsibilites I would do so.

4) How do you remain a nurturing wife and mother when you are busy with so many responsibilities?

It is very hard. I try to out source as many things as I can afford to (I.e., laundry, cleaning) so that I have time to be emotionally present for my family.

5) You're at work and a child calls that he's sick. What do you do? And what if he's sick for a week with the chicken pox?

Usually my husband or I would go and pick the child up. Usually we would switch off spending time with the child according our work schedules. If neither of us could do it and I didn't feel that the child was too sick, I might ask my mom or MIL (who both live locally) for help.

6) When you're alone and your thoughts drift, are you usually thinking about yourself, your family, or about work?

Family or worrying about things around the house that need to get done.

7) What healthy balance have you developed about sharing your personal life with your coworkers?

I share basic information (I.e., they know I have 2 year old daughter, neighborhood I live in, some know that I'm Orthodox).

amother

Tue, Apr 27 2010, 12:14 pm

1) What positive messages do you tell yourself that make you feel happy about going to work?

I don't talk to myself much, not big on internal pep-talks. Seems phony-cheery to me. I either enjoy or I don't, and I don't spend a lot of time deciding one way or the other. But I like to eat three times a day, like having a roof over my head, like having health insurance, like knowing if CH"V dh weren't in the picture I could support the family. I also like talking to adults who will understand when I use words of more than one syllable, and like to be Ms. Suchandsuch, Tax Consultant, not solely Mrs. Suchandsuch, Toby's mother.

2) How do you fit in davening to your work schedule?

The best part of the day is the golden early-morning hours. Get up half an hour earlier and the world is yours.

3) How do you faithfully fulfill your obligations to your employer and not allow personal/family responsibilities to infringe on your work time?

You assume a lot, don't you? Maybe I don't. Maybe others are making up the slack. No, seriously, B"H I have a good vacation/personal leave allowance, which I use frugally. To make up for leaving early on Fridays, I come in earlier every day. Family knows to call only for emergencies. When we had small children we had babysitters come to our home to care for the kids there, so that even if the kids were sick we could still go to work. When the kids were in school and we had no sitter, dh and I took turns staying home. Fortunately dh can do some of his work at home and can work unusual hours if need be. Forunately, not all my work is critically time-dependent.

B"H I also had at the time parents who were retired but in decent health living nearby and could fill in when there was no one available. We couldn't have managed without them. Even when they weren't taking care of the kids, the idea that they were there and could step in in an emergency meant peace of mind. You can't buy that for money.

4) How do you remain a nurturing wife and mother when you are busy with so many responsibilities?

Who says I do? I don't feel very nurturing. Maybe I'm not a nurtiring nature. Or maybe I AM nurtiring, but I'm not a helicopter. I don't hover. I try to bring up independent, self-reliant individuals.

5) You're at work and a child calls that he's sick. What do you do? And what if he's sick for a week with the chicken pox?

We chose a school that wasn't our hashkafa at all because it was close to the house for juist this rerason. If school was going to call and say your kid's sick, I wanted to be able to get him home quickly. IIRC, Hashgacha Protis was there when I needed it. My kids got chcken pox when a relative had semester break, so she babysat part of the time.

6) When you're alone and your thoughts drift, are you usually thinking about yourself, your family, or about work?

Yes, yes, and yes.

7) What healthy balance have you developed about sharing your personal life with your coworkers?

Again, who says it's healthy? I talk way too much. I have coworkers who are clams, I don't even know if they're marriued or not, and I wish I could be like them. But my dad called me a "running brook" who couldn't keep her mouth shut, so...I share things, but nothing intimate. No badmouthing the dh. No we're having this problem or that. Yes griping about school tuition b/c that's universal, almost a cliche. Yes telling funny stories about something the kid did. Nothing I'd be embarrassed if everyone on the floor knew about it.

Ruchel

Tue, Apr 27 2010, 11:28 pm

Hi!
I asked my mom to do it, is it fine?

1) What positive messages do you tell yourself that make you feel happy about going to work?
That it's for the family

2) How do you fit in davening to your work schedule?
The common transportations allow even a very long davening daily!

3) How do you faithfully fulfill your obligations to your employer and not allow personal/family responsibilities to infringe on your work time?
Her family knows to call her only if needed or during her break.

4) How do you remain a nurturing wife and mother when you are busy with so many responsibilities?
Because it comes first, always

5) You're at work and a child calls that he's sick. What do you do? And what if he's sick for a week with the chicken pox?
If dad cannot do it, she comes/stays home with a doctor's note. The boss can't do anything against a note and often they understand even if they don't like it.

6) When you're alone and your thoughts drift, are you usually thinking about yourself, your family, or about work?
Family (child, husband, parents, now grandchild)

7) What healthy balance have you developed about sharing your personal life with your coworkers?
Non personal stuff (my granddaughter has a new tooth!) is fine, personal is not