Some kids don’t thrive in a school setting

amother

Peach

Sun, Apr 07 2024, 11:38 pm

My DS was like this last year and we switched schools and he is bh thriving. Last year he was in a school with zero structure, zero discipline, an educational philosophy of we just want happy children, we don't care if they're learning. The school he's in now is much more rigid and structured and that's actually much better for him. I find the kids that have a hard time sitting are the ones that need the most structure. He knows exactly where he needs to be, when he needs to be doing certain things, and what his expectations are. And gets such satisfaction from seeing that hard work leads to success

amother

Ebony

Mon, Apr 08 2024, 6:40 am

amother Heather wrote:

This is all true but it will only benefit these children as adults if we can teach them to learn to sit and conform to the social norms.
Otherwise what kind of adults will they turn out to be?!

I agree to some extent. But it depends how much they suffer while going through it. I was a kid like this, and while learning to sit down and conform are valuable skills for me as an adults, I suffered tremendously in school, to the point of depression in first grade and then depression and being suicidal in 9th grade. There has to be balance, and these skills need to be taught gradually, alongside other learning methodologies as well.

Imagine what the world would be like if we all had to do the exact same thing all the time. Go to work, sit for 8 hours a day on hard wooden chairs while your boss talks at you and you have to write it all down and constantly test you on it, plus then you go home and have to do even more work. And while you are at work, you aren't even allowed to stand up without permission from your boss, much less use the bathroom or have a bite to eat, and you aren't allowed to talk ever without your boss giving you permission, even if you don't understand something. And you are in a room with 20 or 30 other people doing the exact same thing and all trying to focus, but also you can't socialize at all, you just need to sit silently and look at your boss all day. If all adults did that all day, some mightbe fine and some might lose it.

Besides, we need plenty of adults to do things that aren't desk jobs. How many people can really do a full day of manual labor? Or have a job that requires being on your feet all day? Or interacting with people all day? Or being a manager and leading others? These are all relevant to many jobs - doctor, lawyer, nurse, teacher, cashier, phone representative, IT, scientists, engineers, agriculture, cleaner, supermarket worker, fire fighter, police officer, the list goes on,and these people are part of what keeps society going.

I'm not saying kids shouldn't learn to sit down and conform, I'm just saying it is only one set of skills and it shouldn't be everything.