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Forum
-> Parenting our children
-> Twins, Triplets, and more
amother
OP
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Wed, Sep 28 2022, 11:35 am
HELP
My almost 2.5 year old twins refuse to wean and throw tantrums, fits, hysteria when I refuse to nurse them. I will only be willing to nurse them to sleep. Mentally I can't take it anymore, I'm also pregnant and my boobs are super sore. They are driving me insane and I don't know what to do. I've tried to give them drinks, done it for only 5 minutes, distractions, and those methods don't work. I think they have anxiety and use me to cope. Thank you so much for your advice.
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amother
Gray
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Wed, Sep 28 2022, 11:39 am
This may not be helpful
But 2 year olds have fits and tantrums on the daily. I personally don’t see it as my role to eliminate tantrums. They are developmentally normal for this age.
That said I hope someone can weigh in to your question about weaning. I was just saying that tantrums are not something I ever thought to avoid
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amother
Freesia
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Wed, Sep 28 2022, 11:40 am
Put vinegar on your nipples before each feed.
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amother
Winterberry
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Wed, Sep 28 2022, 11:42 am
Go out at night for 3-4 days.
What do they do when you are away at night?
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amother
Sand
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Wed, Sep 28 2022, 12:04 pm
Just don't do it. At that age, I would treat it like any other boundary- no, we aren't doing that. Make sure you're covered well, so they can't ignore what you're saying. When they get upset- I know you're upset about this. I'm sorry you're upset. Do you want a hug?
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amother
Cerulean
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Wed, Sep 28 2022, 12:28 pm
Weaning is hard. Unless the child wants it, saying no is hard. If you don’t want it anymore, then it is no. But you have to be so sure within YOURSELF that you are done. It has to be a decision for you more than for them.
I’ve never weaned twins, but I’ve weaned more than a few times. It works ONLY when I am
firm with myself that I have reached my limit.
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SuperWify
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Wed, Sep 28 2022, 12:44 pm
Wow. Can I just say I’m impressed you made it to this point with 2 of them…!
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hodeez
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Wed, Sep 28 2022, 12:47 pm
Just say no! You're the mom, you have that power
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amother
Tuberose
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Wed, Sep 28 2022, 12:51 pm
I stopped nursing all my kids around 1 for that reason. I was traumatized by ladies trying to wean kids over 2 yrs old very often pregnant! I'm sorry it's not really a help but ladies keep it in mind for your next kid! (I also happen to be a morah for younger 2's, it's way more common than you think!!)
Do you offer a cup of drink every time they ask to nurse?
Do they have pacifiers?
Ask your husband to be more involved for a couple of weeks so nursing is less available .
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amother
Rainbow
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Wed, Sep 28 2022, 1:05 pm
At that age, I would literally put bandaids on yourself and say it’s broken. Offer snuggles, water, whatever and prepare for a rough few nights but just end it.
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Cookin4days
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Wed, Sep 28 2022, 1:20 pm
Theres a cream thatll make your nipples taste awful, try it out. It helped my sil wean her 2 yr old who refused cups
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amother
Molasses
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Wed, Sep 28 2022, 1:22 pm
Following.
Trying to wean my two year old. It’s so hard because I’m nursing my newborn so I’m not always covered very well and he just wants to nurse.
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amother
Taupe
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Wed, Sep 28 2022, 1:27 pm
When my daughter was 28 months, we made her a big girl party. We invited some relatives and made a cake.
We told her she's a big girl now, we bought a special big girl book to incorporate into our bedtime routine, and we told her we're saying goodbye to nursing cuz she's a big girl now. We moved things around a little so she didn't get triggered to need to nurse when I put her to bed. Surprisingly, she took it very well.
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amother
Antiquewhite
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Wed, Sep 28 2022, 1:31 pm
I shorten the nursing sessions to 5-10 seconds. I count aloud and then break the suction. If they try I’ll do another 5-10 seconds. I then cuddle, kiss, etc. so they get closeness without the nursing. I also offer a drink if they ask to nurse, often the answer is yes.
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amother
Coffee
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Wed, Sep 28 2022, 1:45 pm
Wow , Amazing that you were able to nurse twins more than 2 years!
What I did was every time child wanted to nurse, I said here take a treat (ice cream , candy, etc) instead or send them out for school a few hours a day to break the pattern.
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octopus
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Wed, Sep 28 2022, 1:47 pm
I had three days of crying and holding him.
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the world's best mom
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Wed, Sep 28 2022, 9:04 pm
I think it's easiest to go cold turkey. No more nursing at all, any time of day, for any amount of time. Some kids cry for one day and some for a few, but then they forget about it. If they are able to understand, tell them they are so big now and they are too big to nurse. Mommy, Daddy, big siblings, other friends and relatives don't nurse because they are big, and now you are big too.
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amother
Turquoise
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Thu, Sep 29 2022, 11:01 am
Been there. Done that. I was only successful at weaning my 2.4 yr old twins, when I went on vacation and sent them away for three nights. I felt bad leaving them, at that point, but knew it was the only way... Good luck!
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