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Forum -> Parenting our children -> School age children
Can't stand DCs' school



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amother


 

Post Tue, Jan 13 2009, 6:38 pm
Just venting. The only calls are for problems, most of the time stupid trivial problems, and they are SO patronizing, condescending, and abrasive. I can't stand it any longer, but there are no other alternative schools for us in this area. Just once, would it kill a teacher/administrator to call with something nice?
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yo'ma




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Jan 13 2009, 6:40 pm
I understand that they have to call about "silly" things, but if you want them to call about something nice and it's not specifically their policy to do that, mention it to the teacher next time. Sorry about the run-on.
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Clarissa




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Jan 13 2009, 6:41 pm
Schools don't usually call to give positive feedback. If you want to hear more about what your child is doing well, speak to the teacher directly.
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RichWithNachas




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Jan 13 2009, 11:01 pm
Actually, in my daughters school they made it a policy to call parents on a positive note, They use it as an incentive for the students. The teacher clooses 2 or 3 girls a week to fill out aform which indicates the areas that the students excelled in during the week. The principal calls the parent while the student is in the principals office . It's a positive interaction bet. the student and the principal. and makes them feel like a million dollars. And of course a chance for the parent to enjoy the pleasure of their child's success.

It would be realy good for other schools to adopt this policy.
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Fox




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Jan 14 2009, 11:21 am
I knew it was going to be a long decade when my oldest DD was in kindergarten. The teacher called me in high dudgeon and yapped for 15 minutes about the fact that DD had used a blue crayon on the lulav and esrog coloring sheet rather than wait docilely for the green and yellow crayons, which were in short supply. I asked DD about it, and she shrugged, saying, "All the greens and yellows were gone, and besides, I've already done this sheet last year."

My biggest complaint about these phone calls is that the teachers don't clarify what they want before they pick up the telephone. Do they want me to take action of some kind? Discipline the child? Talk to the child? Are the simply informing me of progress? Or are they using me as a kind of virtual faculty lounge in which they can complain about the quirks of their students?

In the intervening years, I've learned a very effective technique when a teacher simply wants to complain about my child: I express sympathy and regret for my child's actions or attitude, and then I say, "You know, I would take her back to [name of hospital where child was born], but I've lost the receipt and I don't think they give refunds or exchanges."

The smarter teachers get my point and laugh. The more challenged teachers begin sputtering, claiming that wasn't what they meant, whereupon I zoom in and ask them precisely what they do want me to do about the situation.
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grin




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Jan 14 2009, 11:23 am
just a thought - have you tried calling the teacher on your incentive to praise her for something? could she be feeling the same way about the mothers?
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shanie5




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Jan 14 2009, 9:57 pm
I have had a number of times when a teacher has either called or sent home a positive note about my child(ren). Many times it has been after a complaint about their lack of s/t-they call to tell me when the child has improved.

It is very appreciated.
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