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Forum
-> Parenting our children
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amother
OP
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 Thu, Nov 28 2024, 7:47 pm
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But, I lose myself way too often. On good days, I just hate my angry tone of voice for such minor stuff that I could've should've said nicely. I hate when my tone of voice shows such annoyance for typical childish behavior. And on harder days, I hate the yelling voice that comes out of my throat. The anger, the disappointment I verbally express to them...and seconds later comes the guilt.. And that eats up chunks of my heart and silently kills me. And then I take courses and read books and know exactly what I am doing differently from now and on, and I still find myself failing way more often than id like to...and the guilt and the feeling like a failure of a parent puts me on the edge and that's what's causing me to get so easily triggered and the cycle begins again...anyone relate?
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amother
Crimson
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Thu, Nov 28 2024, 7:53 pm
Definitely.
To add, I hate the attention I give my phone when my kids need me to be 100%
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amother
Lightpink
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Thu, Nov 28 2024, 7:54 pm
Anger is often a result of anxiety or trauma. Therapy could be very helpful because you know the parenting piece but you can't implement it. Give yourself a lot of credit for your efforts.
Good luck
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newinbp
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Thu, Nov 28 2024, 10:01 pm
a new book I've discovered has been very helpful if you like to read:
are your hands full? by dr. yaroslawitz.
Hatzlacha! good shabbos 
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amother
Periwinkle
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Thu, Nov 28 2024, 10:03 pm
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If you know everything but you can't do it, then it's usually something that needs to be worked on in therapy. Reading one more book is not going to help, but a therapist can help explore what blocks you.
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