Responding versus reacting

amother

Sat, Sep 07 2024, 8:44 pm

Git voch,
Im trying to work on myself, on my spiritual growth as well as emotional well being.
Ive been for therapy over the years and read many books on self growth. Id like to share some thoughts for those that are interested Wink

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One concept im trying to implement these days is responding rather than reacting. When I do manage to resist that itch and I respond rather than react, I feel so much happier.

RESPONDING VERSUS REACTING

Reacting is driven by emotion and lacks thought or analysis, while responding is thoughtful and deliberate
Reacting can lead to unintended and sometimes negative consequences, while responding can help make things better
Reacting is quick, immediate and rash. Responding is slower. Responding creates more space between an event and what you do.
Responding is harder than reacting. It takes more time and effort. It often requires letting a strong itch.
Reacting is meeting one action with another. When you react to a situation you fuse with it and become it. Going from one reaction to the next is an emotional roller-coaster. When you respond to a situation, however, you put a few degrees of freedom between a deeper and more stable sense of self.
Reacting is an instinctive, emotional response to a situation. It's often impulsive and can be influenced by our past experiences or fears. On the other hand, responding is a thoughtful and deliberate action. It involves considering the situation, weighing the options, and making a conscious decision.

So how does one learn to respond rather than react?

Firstly pause and label the emotion your feeling. I have handy on my phone a list of emotions. If I have that time in a situation than I refer to my emotion list and label it. It ALWAYS IMMEDIATLY lowers the intesity of the emotion.
While it might seem that owning your insecurity would give it more power, it’s the opposite. When you identify your emotions—especially the negative ones—it lessens the likelihood that the emotion will control you. It switches you out of being fused with your emotion (reaction mode) and into a more thoughtful state (reponsive mode)

to be continued...