Can the older generation alleviate the housing crises?

amother

↑ Lightyellow ↓

Tue, Aug 27 2024, 1:24 pm

amother Blushpink wrote:

You realize if the young move out the entire community will become an old age home by definition?

There's a benefit to having young families.
It keeps a community vibrant.

No one is advocating to put them in nursing homes so please stop this nonsense.

My parents also converted 3 bedrooms to a decent couple apartment.

They now have a nice size 3 bedroom apartment so they're still able to host somewhat.

Or else wait until a house becomes avaliable. This is the reality in most communities. I have so many friends that only move back to our hometown community after many years of marriage and many children because they cannot afford or find a house earlier.

amother

Denim ↓

Tue, Aug 27 2024, 1:25 pm

amother OP wrote:

But they didn't! They moved into an existing smaller community and hijacked all their conveniences.

Most of these women were stay at home mums. The men were in kollel and they STILL were able to buy huge houses in their twenties. In a city!!

Their tution was peanuts and was waived for many many large families because of the hashkafah of having many kids.

I wrote my OP because all I want is to know that I can have another kid! I don't need what they have. I am not asking for a study, a playroom, I don't need more than 1-2 bedrooms to fit all my kids iyh, I don't need a big front and back yard, I don't need parking because we don't have a car. I don't need a laundry room, hallway etc. I Just want a kitchen, decent living room and 2-3 bedrooms. I would love a small garden for the kids.

All I want is a healthy family.

I was just suggesting an idea and would like to hear others opinions RESPECTFULLY.

It's funny how you're asking everyone to be respectful when your attitude toward the older generation is far from respectful. Hijacked communiites? Invested nothing in communities growth?
I smell marxism and survival of the fittest here. They did they're job, are now no longer relevant so let's get rid of them to make space for the younger ones.

I get what you're trying to say OP and I feel for you, but please realize why you're getting all the backlash. Your post is not worded very respectfully..

amother

↑ Blushpink

Tue, Aug 27 2024, 1:27 pm

OP your community has to come together and market the benefits of this idea.

I know streets in my own community that are dying down because its populated by 65 plus and became like an old age home. No young families want to buy/rent there at this point.

If the 65 plus population is smart they start converting their own homes immediately after they don't need the space anymore.

Converting. Not moving out.

amother

Pearl

Tue, Aug 27 2024, 1:28 pm

Sounds like where my parents live and yes if you don’t have a path to US citizenship it’s a problem. And yes the older generation got lucky in terms of piggybacking on infrastructure to live comfortably but the younger generation can’t do that anymore. Maybe lots of young people need to decide to move somewhere way past thornhill or whatever, or just decide they’re living for example an Israeli or European lifestyle with space constraints to match and change their mindset.

imaima

Tue, Aug 27 2024, 1:29 pm

amother OP wrote:

I am writing this due to my very uncomfortable situation. I am literally at a loss.

I come from a city where the young generation does not have where to live. This is not an exaggeration of any kind. There are no nearby places for young couples to go. The community is looking to expand and relocate but there are literally no option. It's not in the USA like Monsey or Lakewood where people can move out.

This is where I start wondering. There are many older couples who have married off their children and are living in huge houses with 4,5,6 bedrooms, huge living dining room and kitchen. I wish those older couples would see their children and grandchildren struggling with raising families in holes. I live in 400 square feet with 2 growing kids. I literally do not have where to put another kid.

If those grandparents would split their houses and rent out the units to 2-3 families (including basement and loft) it would really alleviate the housing crises. Those couples were fortunate to buy those houses when they were young marrieds themselves and now that they don't need it, it would be a great service to put some of them back on the market to sell.

I am thinking of two of my grandparents living in a ridiculous amount of space which hardly gets used. They can keep some parts for themselves and rent or sell the rest. Whenever I pass these huge empty houses, I fantasize.

Most of them have had a double digit family themselves and support large families. Now it's time for us to raise ours. But where?

I just feel so hopeless at the moment. What's going to be? Where should I raise my kids? In my tiny bedroom? Small windows, no porch, no space for my stroller or suitcases.

I think it could be discussed.

amother

↑ OP ↓

Tue, Aug 27 2024, 1:31 pm

amother Blushpink wrote:

yes, I didn't mention it previously but my grandparents live on a street with so many older people. It's kind of lost it's vibrancy.

When I grew up, we were a mixed neighbourhood with many ages. I used to go to the elderly neighbour to sing and bring cookies etc. It's nice to have a mix. Their street is so eerie...

amother

↑ OP ↓

Tue, Aug 27 2024, 1:36 pm

amother Blushpink wrote:

Right!! We WANT our grandparents living near us. They are dear to us and we want to pitch in as they age. Speaking as someone who has done a lot for my grandparents and their parents too. It's a family value for us to look after our grandparents. Everyone pitches in. BH BH my family is great in this regard.

But whenver I am there, I can't help but think of those upper floors that are dilapidated and empty.

Changing things around for a very elderly couple is unadvisable as others have mentioned but doing so when the couple is relatively young like 50ish or a little older is more doable. They're young enough to acclimate to new dimensions and they can build their apartment with their new needs iyh in mind.

I know someone who did this very successfully.

amother

↑ Magnolia

Tue, Aug 27 2024, 1:37 pm

amother Pearl wrote:

lol I was getting Toronto vibes from this post as well

amother

↑ Lightyellow ↓

Tue, Aug 27 2024, 1:38 pm

amother OP wrote:

A lot of people still have kids at home in their 50s and they cant move.

#BestBubby ↓

Tue, Aug 27 2024, 1:44 pm

Today's generation has a much much harder time buying a house than grandparents.

In 1970 median house was $25k and median income was $10k.
So a house cost 2.5 years income.

Today median house is $420k and median income is $58k.
So now a median house is over 7 years income.

And in jewish communities housing is much more.

In 1970 ONE INCOME could support a wife and kids and own a house and a car. Today even TWO incomes can't afford a house.

And the government did this on purpose.
Easier to control a poor population than a middle class population.

↑ cnc

Tue, Aug 27 2024, 1:46 pm

amother OP wrote:

Right but I would think having large families is a bigger value then hosting occasionally.

I just want to clarify, I am not advocating for communism style forcing our grandparents to move. I just sometimes wonder what they think though because I have seen a couple of people do this selflessly. They bought a small apartment with the money or keep a part of the house for themselves.

You can choose your own values, but you can't decide others' values for them.
Additionally, what kind of value is having large families and then sort of washing your hands off them once they reach a certain age? People want to shep nachas and enjoy their generations, even when they are older..

Last edited by cnc on Tue, Aug 27 2024, 1:47 pm; edited 1 time in total

amother

↑ Watermelon ↓

Tue, Aug 27 2024, 1:46 pm

amother OP wrote:

Most ppl in their 50s have no interest in moving out of their house. Many still have children living at home. So this wouldn't exactly work. Also parents would only be able to give their house to 1 of their children, so this won't be a great solution in any case.

amother

Myrtle

Tue, Aug 27 2024, 1:51 pm

If you are in Europe (maybe Canada as well?) the economy now is much worse than it was a generation ago. Europeans are much poorer than they used to be, especially compared to the US. Europe used to have a huge manufacturing economy, now not so much. They also don't have any significant tech economy. I don't know if it's because of socialism, regulations, stupid policies because of the environment or other things. But yes, it was easier for the older generation. I don't know what the answer is, but emigration might be part of it.

Dolly Welsh ↓

Tue, Aug 27 2024, 2:29 pm

amother Blushpink wrote:

This. Exactly this.

OP is right.

If two generations share a house, there is built-in care for the aging grandparents. There will be a vegetable garden worked by either or both grandparents. The main part of the house is a baby-machine. Let it do its job again. The grandparents would be happy to see it productive that way again. What else is there to do in life, but contemplate one's grandkids.

In addition, OP, there is also Jew-steading.

You locate, using online research, an old but functional mikvah, that is just hanging on, in a no-longer-Jewish area. You and your friends, several families, buy cheap houses near it. You set up monthly meat deliveries from the nearest city. And, communal commuting, in one car, to jobs, for the men. Or they work from home. And home schooling for the kids, supported by visiting paid teachers from the nearest city's yeshiva. And a Stiebel. Any conference room or back of a store will do for a Stiebel. The main thing that's hard is a mikvah. The rest is not as hard. There are websites that list mikvahs in every zip code.

Changing conditions require flexibility.

↑ PinkFridge ↓

Tue, Aug 27 2024, 2:40 pm

amother OP wrote:

Fiftyish? With their own teen kids who want to host friends? With wanting to still host the family? Who may need the space for their own purposes, e.g. offices? What and whose "new needs"?

↑ PinkFridge ↓

Tue, Aug 27 2024, 2:43 pm

Dolly Welsh wrote:

Dolly, you are on to something. The situation is much more acute in communities where NO ONE ever moves out.
And is it okay if I call dibs on writing a story about Jew-steading? Wink