Just found out | Imamother

Fox

Thu, Aug 08 2024, 3:29 pm

My twins will turn 29 next month, and I'm pretty much caught up on sleep. I've finally got my house pretty tidy, too!

Seriously, OP, the days are long but the years are short.

1. Get help, even if it means accepting charity.
2. Don't let your older kids' attention from relatives and friends be swallowed up by the twins.
3. Let go of any perfectionist instincts.
______________________________________

When my twins and I were discharged from the hospital after their birth, the protocol required them to wheel me out carrying the babies. The nurses put a bit of drama into this, knowing that twins would attract attention. They rounded up pink blankets and hats, and an entire entourage from Labor & Delivery went along for the show.

We rounded a corner, and coming toward us were a group of really rough, tough-looking bikers. Dirty jeans; leather vests; club patches; chains, etc. The type of guys you'd typically cross the street to avoid and not even worry if you were being unfair. They were conversing about their friend, who'd been shot.

But then they saw me with my two little bundles, and they melted. They greeted me with big smiles and hovered around, asking questions. "Are they identical?" "What are their names?" "Can you tell them apart?" One of them said, "You're so lucky!"

I've kept that memory close to my heart. When things were difficult for whatever reason, I remembered that intimidating biker leaning over and telling me how lucky I was. Sometimes Hashem sends unusual shluchim, but the message was spot-on. Twins are an incredible miracle!

amother

↑ OP ↓

Thu, Aug 08 2024, 4:02 pm

Fox wrote:

Thanks for the tips, fox!
And wow what an incredible story!

amother

↑ Oleander ↓

Thu, Aug 08 2024, 4:04 pm

Let me tell you something op, my twins are newborns now. I. Had. So. Much. Anxiety. during the pregnancy. I did not ever wish for twins.
BH it’s all going so much better than expected. They are nr 3 and 4. We have a lot of help, all our savings are being spent on it and it is so worth the money.
I’m enjoying them so much and are able to be a mother to my other children as well. They are soo cute and I’m so in love with them. And with all the help I‘m not leaving my house for days in a row 😆
And yes, let go of perfection. My house is a bit chaotic and it’s fine for now.

amother

↑ OP ↓

Thu, Aug 08 2024, 4:26 pm

I guess the financial part is also adding a lot if stress.
This is baby 5 and 6.
I know I'll need tons of help but also I don't know if I will want to go back to work. I can't imagine sending 2 babies out
And then we were just notified that our insurance is going way up and having these babies is going to cost a ton!
We are going to have to dip really far into our savings and I'm so nervous about that!

amother

↑ Burntblack

Thu, Aug 08 2024, 4:31 pm

amother OP wrote:

This is one of the pluses of 9 months of pregnancy. You have lots of time to prepare yourself mentally, physically and financially. My insurance shouldn’t really change since the price is already maxed at 3/4 kids so adding two more doesn’t make it go up anymore.

amother

↑ Oleander

Thu, Aug 08 2024, 4:50 pm

amother OP wrote:

I just keep reminding myself that hashem knows what he is doing and this is part of his plan but it's really hard TMI

But I'm definitely strengthening my bitachon!

Yes! This is the only way to survive. He has a plan.
Take it one day at a time.
Do you have to send your babies out?
I have to go back to work but I have a nanny at home for them during my work hours.

amother

Brickred

Fri, Aug 09 2024, 1:40 am

OP I worried so much for the duration of my pregnancy and I ended up worrying about the wrong things... it is overwhelming and normal to worry and like IMA Fox said letting go of perfection helps a lot.

I called ATIME for recommendations and switched to a MFM. I would check with them if you should wait for 20 weeks.

Hatzlacha and loads of koach with an easy, stress free pregnancy and delivery!!