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Genius
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 Thu, Jul 18 2019, 3:24 pm
| amother [ Linen ] wrote: | | which is it? She should or shouldn't be insulted? |
If she feels that his not eating in a restaurant of her choice is an insult (which I don't agree with) then that's precisely what she was asking for
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urban gypsy
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Thu, Jul 18 2019, 3:25 pm
| genius wrote: | | If she feels that his not eating in a restaurant of her choice is an insult (which I don't agree with) then that's precisely what she was asking for |
Totally agree...we create our reality
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giselle
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Thu, Jul 18 2019, 3:25 pm
| urban gypsy wrote: | | I said checking with a lightbox. That's not the only way to check. |
Got it. Not even sure what a lightbox is 🤷🏼♀️
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amother
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Thu, Jul 18 2019, 3:27 pm
| amother [ Cerulean ] wrote: | I'm sorry you feel that you are being treated badly. If I understand your post, you had your daughter wait in line while you continued shopping. That's not considered acceptable in any of the places I shop.
And maybe what you heard as a condescending tone of voice was her trying to accommodate you because she thought that English isn't your first language.
I'm not saying no one is ever rude, just not really seeing it in your post. |
No. I was standing right beside her and The woman was addressing me. And I meant ‘we’ shldnt move since she kept bringing me more stuff to try.
Anyhow.....
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urban gypsy
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Thu, Jul 18 2019, 3:27 pm
| giselle wrote: | | Got it. Not even sure what a lightbox is 🤷🏼♀️ |
I remember our home ec teacher going on about cleaning her lettuce in the "washing machine" and I was picturing her throwing it in her Maytag with the laundry... I'm still not even sure what a "lettuce washing machine" is .....
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amother
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Thu, Jul 18 2019, 3:27 pm
| amother [ Floralwhite ] wrote: | Sometimes it’s the body language, or the look on their face that says it all. Many times I am passed over when asking for help to others standing behind me. And when I am helped, the condescending tone of voice used needs no further imagination.
I was recently at a popular children’s store in Flatbush. The nicest sales lady there WAS the Hispanic help. And yes I was cognizant of how the other women were treated by the Jewish employees. I traveled 40 minutes so that I can shop and was in a rush to get back home so I can make my kids buses. I told my daughter she should not move from her spot in the line for the cashier since we were running very late. There was this woman who kept cutting into the line to keep asking questions etc and I guess she overheard me saying it to my daughter. In the loudest most condescending tone of voice that made everyone’s head turn around she yelled, ‘do not worry, I will not go before you. Do not worry. ’ As if I am the one to blame by waiting respectfully for my chance for 20 mins. U can well imagine I was snobbed even more when my turn came and vowed never to give them my business again (and I was a repeat customer!)
This is just one small occurrence but I experience it time and again. And the Odd thing is, when I personally see others come to shop in wmsbg, I find the sales people giving them even better customer service than for the rest of us. Of course there are always the bad apples but the majority of the pple I’m surrounded by wld never snob a woman at the grocery or elsewhere (I’m actually flummoxed that This is true) based on their personal standards.
I just want to point out that I do agree that adults and kids may stare but it’s just because they are sheltered and this is something they don’t see often. Ignorance and not the best manners combined. But to snob or behave rudely on purpose, I have yet to come across this phenomenon. |
"Snob" is not a verb. Can you explain further; I don't understand.
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urban gypsy
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Thu, Jul 18 2019, 3:28 pm
| amother [ Brown ] wrote: | | "Snob" is not a verb. Can you explain further; I don't understand. |
That's your takeaway? Thanks grammar police 
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Fox
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Thu, Jul 18 2019, 3:31 pm
| amother [ Chartreuse ] wrote: | Fox, I think we can close almost any thread after you post because you always seem to say it all and perfectly!!  |
This is incredibly sweet of you, but remember not to feed wild animals. We become dependent and lose our ability to hunt in the wilds of the Internet!
____________________
Now, here's an opinion that will likely be less popular:
Just as people can't insist that you affirm their lives, you can't demand that other people affirm yours.
The person whom I've learned the most from regarding this is a writer for The Federalist named Chad Felix Greene. Greene is a non-halachic convert who wears a yarmulke. He is gay and married to an immigrant. He is a victim/survivor of rape which left him HIV+. Oh, and he lives in rural West Virginia!
Any one of those items on a checklist is going to upset somebody, somewhere. Yet Greene claims he's never experienced judgment or prejudice. His secret, he says, is that he simply doesn't give people the opportunity or right to affirm him. If someone tells him he's sinful for any of the above reasons (including, I suspect, living in WV), he says, "I appreciate the concern, and I hope you'll pray for me."
In other words, if you're more-or-less happy with your derech in life, don't allow random strangers in stores to poskin on it. Nobody made them gedolim hador! If they engage in non-verbal passive-aggressiveness, pretend they're just stressed and overwhelmed by the horrific demands of selling you shoes or whatever. If they say something, pretend they're trying to be helpful and thank them. If they're over-the-top rude, just thank them and leave.
One of the most valuable skills you can develop -- and one that I learned far too late in life -- is not only to have a healthy disregard for the disapproval of random people, but to also realize how many people truly are random. Like most things in life, this has a counter-intuitive element: the less you care, the less opportunistic bullies will attempt to put you down.
I know, I know. It takes a lot of practice. But it's a skill worth practicing and developing, and it's actually entertaining to watch people deflate when they realize that their little games are not going to cow you.
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amother
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Thu, Jul 18 2019, 3:32 pm
| urban gypsy wrote: | | That's your takeaway? Thanks grammar police |
My takeaway is that I have no clue at all how she was treated, because she used a non-existent and nonsensical word. Its as if she said that she the salesperson djfsjdf her. I can't comment intelligently without understanding what happened.
If you understood, please explain instead of being nasty.
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singleagain
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Thu, Jul 18 2019, 3:33 pm
| amother [ Brown ] wrote: | | "Snob" is not a verb. Can you explain further; I don't understand. |
I am not that poster. But I read the word "snub" snob must have been a typo
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amother
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Thu, Jul 18 2019, 3:36 pm
| amother [ Brown ] wrote: | My takeaway is that I have no clue at all how she was treated, because she used a non-existent and nonsensical word. Its as if she said that she the salesperson djfsjdf her. I can't comment intelligently without understanding what happened.
If you understood, please explain instead of being nasty. |
Read snob as snub. Or she acted like a snob the way she treated me. Really not hard to understand.
Actually your comment was a good example of "snobing", or "snobbing"
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amother
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Thu, Jul 18 2019, 3:37 pm
| singleagain wrote: | | I am not that poster. But I read the word "snub" snob must have been a typo |
Thank you. Yes, Snubbed and snub. My bad.
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urban gypsy
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Thu, Jul 18 2019, 3:37 pm
| amother [ Brown ] wrote: | My takeaway is that I have no clue at all how she was treated, because she used a non-existent and nonsensical word. Its as if she said that she the salesperson djfsjdf her. I can't comment intelligently without understanding what happened.
If you understood, please explain instead of being nasty. |
And my takeaway is that your comprehension must be very weak if a single misused word in a 500 word paragraph will throw you off so badly you have "no clue at all" what she wrote... if you are being sincere and not being sarcastic that is super sad, I've never encountered that level of reading difficulty 
singleagain is probably right but I read it as people were acting snobbishly towards her
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giselle
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Thu, Jul 18 2019, 3:38 pm
| amother [ Brown ] wrote: | My takeaway is that I have no clue at all how she was treated, because she used a non-existent and nonsensical word. Its as if she said that she the salesperson djfsjdf her. I can't comment intelligently without understanding what happened.
If you understood, please explain instead of being nasty. |
Really?
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amother
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Thu, Jul 18 2019, 3:41 pm
| urban gypsy wrote: | And my takeaway is that your comprehension must be very weak if a single misused word in a 500 word paragraph will throw you off so badly you have "no clue at all" what she wrote... if you are being sincere and not being sarcastic that is super sad, I've never encountered that level of reading difficulty
singleagain is probably right but I read it as people were acting snobbishly towards her |
Both. Acting snobbishly and being snubbed. And thank you for sticking up for me. (Do u think I’m being picked at because I wrote that I am identifiably chassidish?)
Jk, I’m not even going there.
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urban gypsy
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Thu, Jul 18 2019, 3:45 pm
| amother [ Floralwhite ] wrote: | | Both. Acting snobbishly and being snubbed. And thank you for sticking up for me. (Do u think I’m being picked at because I wrote that I am identifiably chassidish?) Jk, I’m not even going there. |
Don't worry I gotchu 
I think we should make "snobing" a new word we use for this sort of behaviour
This also reminds me of the restaurant scene from the film Ferris Bueller's Day Off...
"You're being snooty... Snooty??? Snotty!!! SNOTTY?!?!"
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amother
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Thu, Jul 18 2019, 3:52 pm
| urban gypsy wrote: | Don't worry I gotchu
I think we should make "snobing" a new word we use for this sort of behaviour
This also reminds me of the restaurant scene from the film Ferris Bueller's Day Off...
"You're being snooty... Snooty??? Snotty!!! SNOTTY?!?!"
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Lol.
Will it be Snobing or snobbing?
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urban gypsy
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Thu, Jul 18 2019, 3:53 pm
| amother [ Floralwhite ] wrote: | Lol.
Will it be Snobing or snobbing? |
You choose! Definition: anonymously dunking on typos/grammar mistakes while feigning incomprehension in order to feel privately superior WE HATE TO SEE IT
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urban gypsy
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Thu, Jul 18 2019, 3:59 pm
| amother [ Brown ] wrote: | | My takeaway is that I have no clue at all how she was treated, because she used a non-existent and nonsensical word. Its as if she said that she the salesperson djfsjdf her. |
Since you believe that snubbed is a non-existent and nonsensical word, I feel comfortable telling you to djfsjdf yourself since that's not a real word either and I can be assured you won't understand anything I wrote in my post.
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amother
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Thu, Jul 18 2019, 4:03 pm
| urban gypsy wrote: | | You choose! Definition: anonymously dunking on typos/grammar mistakes while feigning incomprehension in order to feel privately superior WE HATE TO SEE IT |
Awright, awright. Since we are creating a new meaning here, snobing it is. 👍
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