how to get in proper frame of mind for licht benchin??

Aish ↓

Mon, Oct 10 2005, 9:49 am

I am struggeling with this issue right now.
after being frazzled, overworked, and totaly exausted, it is the biggest avodah to tune all the noise and caos out of my head and light the shabbos licht and tune into the moment and the tremendous opportunity I have right there.
a few weeks ago, I think it took me a good 3-4 minutes, and repeatedly telling myself, im lighting now. concentrate! and it was still hard. and I so want to take advantage of every friday night and of this incredible opportunity to talk to hashem with my whole heart.
I would welcome any and all tips and advise that anyone here has to offer about how you work hard to put your total kavanas into lighting shabbos licht.

Thank you.

Last edited by Aish on Mon, Oct 10 2005, 10:34 am; edited 1 time in total

deedee

Mon, Oct 10 2005, 10:00 am

one of the best ways I find is to have most things done on thur. I have a cleaning lady in the day and at night I make the gefilta fish & chicken soup-I happen to like it better reheated it has more flavor. on friday I stick chiken and rice in the oven, chulent in the crockpot and boil eggs. an hr b-4 shabbos I do a light clean up and hop in the shower. the kids light b-4 me and they usually go off to play so I have them out of my hair for candle lighting.

BinahYeteirah

Mon, Oct 10 2005, 10:09 am

I have no idea what your schedule is like, or if this is possible for you, but I try to have very little Shabbos prep left to do on Friday. I do almost all my cooking and cleaning on Thursday. I do baking and challah earlier in the week. If I don't get everything done, I can finish up on Friday, but the afternoon is still free for more low-key Shabbos prep (showering, time with kids, maybe a little davening). If you have many other non-Shabbos-related commitments to take care of, maybe you could do some of those on Friday instead so that you don't feel that whatever you are doing has to be done by candlelighting. I find that not feeling rushed makes the house much calmer and lessens any tendency to pre-Shabbos conflict.

Maybe read a little or say a few tehillim right before licht bentchen, just to get in a better frame of mind.

TzenaRena

Mon, Oct 10 2005, 10:15 am

This all sounds great, and I'm sure it can work, what about our current Tishrei schedule? Yom Kippur is over Thursday night! There is a seudah to serve as well, motzoei YK! Any tips? ideas?

↑ Aish ↓

Mon, Oct 10 2005, 10:16 am

thanks deedee.
actually I also cook before. its really not so much a disorganization problem as it is a kavanah problem at the moment that I need it. we all know that the satan comes in on fri and tries to botch things up. and I think this is one of his projects.
I meant more like what do you tell yourself. how do you prep yourself, so you can fully tune into this holy moment.
as well, this can branch out into the topic of doing the same when we go to shul and have to deal with the kids at one point or another. and you really need and want those kavanas.
what are some of your secrets ladies.
please share!

↑ Aish

Mon, Oct 10 2005, 10:17 am

[quote="BinahYeteirah"]

Quote:

Maybe read a little or say a few tehillim right before licht bentchen, just to get in a better frame of mind.

good idea

↑ roza

Mon, Oct 10 2005, 11:14 am

SaraYehudis wrote:

This all sounds great, and I'm sure it can work, what about our current Tishrei schedule? Yom Kippur is over Thursday night! There is a seudah to serve as well, motzoei YK! Any tips? ideas?

cook everything today (now) and freeze.
get readymade stuff for this shabbos.

goldrose

Sat, Jan 21 2006, 6:12 pm

SaraYehudis wrote:

This all sounds great, and I'm sure it can work, what about our current Tishrei schedule? Yom Kippur is over Thursday night! There is a seudah to serve as well, motzoei YK! Any tips? ideas?

yes an idea - spend a few dollars more, (or more than a few) just this once for peace of mind and peace of family, and BUY shabbos food. also, bathrooms work just fine when they are dirty, perhaps it can wait till after shabbos for cleaning.

I dont know how to cook sukkos in two days, but you can cook ON sukkos too so I guess there's no rush.