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Forum
-> Parenting our children
-> School age children
Would your child spill the beans about Santa?
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| Yes |
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5% |
[ 6 ] |
| Unfortunately, my child already has |
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0% |
[ 1 ] |
| No, my child doesn’t even know what Santa is |
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33% |
[ 38 ] |
| No, we don’t have exposure to non-Jews for it to come up |
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43% |
[ 50 ] |
| No |
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14% |
[ 17 ] |
| Other |
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1% |
[ 2 ] |
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| Total Votes : 114 |
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amother
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 Today at 3:40 pm
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I told a Jewish 12 year old that the tooth fairy isn't real. Was that wrong of me? I don't believe in lying to kids and I didn't believe she truly believed it at 12 anyway. I still think she was joking around.
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amother
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Today at 3:43 pm
| amother Opal wrote: | And my sisters niece who became “educated” in public school (unfortunate situation)
Told her daughter and my girls about relations. My kids were at sisters house and that niece popped in while sister was out.
She gave them a shock and they had many questions lol
It happens. As upsetting as it is. And believe me I was furious. She’s over 18, she had no business telling kids under a certain age about s-xual topics. Especially in our community
Eta-we were told by a rav that legally she did something wrong and I can press charges
But we were advised for our kids sake. |
You asked a Shelia if you should press changes against your sisters niece ???
Im glad your wise rav didn't think it was advisable
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amother
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Today at 3:43 pm
| amother Oxfordblue wrote: | Eliyahu Hanavi comes to drink from the cup by the seder and the whole show of sending the kids to the door while the parents try to discreetly pour back some wine from the cup so it looks like he really drank.
That's how we grew up and it didn't shatter much for us when we figured it out that it wasn't actually him that drank.
I wonder what caused you to have such a strong reaction. |
First time I ever heard of parents sneakily pouring wine back. I don't think that's really a thing.
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amother
Currant
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Today at 3:48 pm
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I went to public school and very proudly told everyone that Santa wasn't real (my mother did get some upset phone calls)
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amother
Brass
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Today at 3:55 pm
| amother Oxfordblue wrote: | Eliyahu Hanavi comes to drink from the cup by the seder and the whole show of sending the kids to the door while the parents try to discreetly pour back some wine from the cup so it looks like he really drank.
That's how we grew up and it didn't shatter much for us when we figured it out that it wasn't actually him that drank.
I wonder what caused you to have such a strong reaction. |
Huh? “Show” of going to the door?
Everyone goes to the door for shfoch Chamascha and no one pours anything out of the kos shel eliyahu. Curious if you come from an ffb family or a more traditional one
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amother
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Today at 4:04 pm
| amother Cornsilk wrote: | You asked a Shelia if you should press changes against your sisters niece ???
Im glad your wise rav didn't think it was advisable |
I wanted to
It was made clear that it’s not a good idea. It’s crazy
ETA-it was my sister who asked the rav, her husband was having pressure from his family not to
Additionally, a judge/lawyer would question the kids, it would be potentially stressful and damaging
I legit want to slap this girl up
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amother
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Today at 4:13 pm
| amother Honeysuckle wrote: | | I told a Jewish 12 year old that the tooth fairy isn't real. Was that wrong of me? I don't believe in lying to kids and I didn't believe she truly believed it at 12 anyway. I still think she was joking around. |
I'm not really sure why people think it's a good idea to overrule parents of other kids. Even if you don't think it's good to lie to kids about Santa, tooth fairy, whatever, is it really your place to jump in? Let other parents make their own decisions.
Pretty sure that's what we'd be saying if it was someone else trying to helpfully educate our kids on something we'd take a different approach to.
And I agree with the posters who said that a 12 year old should be old enough to not tease a 6 year old about the existence of Santa.
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Bnei Berak 10
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Today at 4:25 pm
| amother Opal wrote: | And my sisters niece who became “educated” in public school (unfortunate situation)
Told her daughter and my girls about relations. My kids were at sisters house and that niece popped in while sister was out.
She gave them a shock and they had many questions lol
It happens. As upsetting as it is. And believe me I was furious. She’s over 18, she had no business telling kids under a certain age about s-xual topics. Especially in our community
Eta-we were told by a rav that legally she did something wrong and I can press charges
But we were advised for our kids sake. |
What charges can you press? On what grounds?
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Bnei Berak 10
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Today at 4:30 pm
| amother Opal wrote: | I wanted to
It was made clear that it’s not a good idea. It’s crazy
ETA-it was my sister who asked the rav, her husband was having pressure from his family not to
Additionally, a judge/lawyer would question the kids, it would be potentially stressful and damaging
I legit want to slap this girl up |
You do realize you had no case, right?
Your can be angry but anger doesn't make it a case.
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amother
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Today at 4:34 pm
| Bnei Berak 10 wrote: | You do realize you had no case, right?
Your can be angry but anger doesn't make it a case. |
From what I understand
It’s illegal for an adult to have such conversation with a minor
Especially the things she said
And she knew exactly what she’s doing. She even threatened them not to tell us. It took them weeks and only 1 daughter had the guts to tell me. The other was scared to.
My niece was too scared to tell her mom. Only after I made her aware did she get to the bottom of it
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Bnei Berak 10
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Today at 4:36 pm
| amother Opal wrote: | And my sisters niece who became “educated” in public school (unfortunate situation)
Told her daughter and my girls about relations. My kids were at sisters house and that niece popped in while sister was out.
She gave them a shock and they had many questions lol
It happens. As upsetting as it is. And believe me I was furious. She’s over 18, she had no business telling kids under a certain age about s-xual topics. Especially in our community
Eta-we were told by a rav that legally she did something wrong and I can press charges
But we were advised for our kids sake. |
How old were your kids it that time?
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amother
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Today at 4:38 pm
| amother Hosta wrote: | I'm not really sure why people think it's a good idea to overrule parents of other kids. Even if you don't think it's good to lie to kids about Santa, tooth fairy, whatever, is it really your place to jump in? Let other parents make their own decisions.
Pretty sure that's what we'd be saying if it was someone else trying to helpfully educate our kids on something we'd take a different approach to.
And I agree with the posters who said that a 12 year old should be old enough to not tease a 6 year old about the existence of Santa. |
It didn't even cross my mind her parents told her that, so I wasn't thinking of overruling her parents. I couldn't believe a (Jewish) 12 year old really believed in the tooth fairy. I was a young 20s newlywed at the time. I said you don't really believe fairies are real, do you??
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Bnei Berak 10
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Today at 4:40 pm
| amother Opal wrote: | From what I understand
It’s illegal for an adult to have such conversation with a minor
Especially the things she said
And she knew exactly what she’s doing. She even threatened them not to tell us. It took them weeks and only 1 daughter had the guts to tell me. The other was scared to.
My niece was too scared to tell her mom. Only after I made her aware did she get to the bottom of it |
She threatened them?
Is this person mentally stable?
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amother
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Today at 4:45 pm
12 and 14.
And they are very sheltered. They know about periods but nothing about relations or anything explicit such as men’s aiver enlarging or entering them etc
It was graphic for them.
The person who teaches them about s-xual topics should be ME.
Not a 20 year old spewing nonsense and giving my children nightmares (the younger one was scared)
She also told it to my 2 nieces ..11 and 8 I believe
She told minor children explicit s-xual content. It freaked them out. And then threatened them to keep it quiet and not tell anyone
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amother
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Today at 4:46 pm
| Bnei Berak 10 wrote: | She threatened them?
Is this person mentally stable? |
She does have emotional issues. She’s
21 by now, unable to get married either.
That girl is no longer welcome at my sisters house. She isn’t trusted
Her excuse when confronted was “big deal they’ll find out eventually”
She denied threatening thrm but all kids stated the same story when asked separately
And they were scared. It took coaxing to get the story out
Only my oldest was mature enough to approach me a month afterwards
They both had questions..it freaked them out. I had to respond carefully not to confirm 100% but I also didn’t want to lie.
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amother
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Today at 5:07 pm
| amother Hosta wrote: | I'm not really sure why people think it's a good idea to overrule parents of other kids. Even if you don't think it's good to lie to kids about Santa, tooth fairy, whatever, is it really your place to jump in? Let other parents make their own decisions.
Pretty sure that's what we'd be saying if it was someone else trying to helpfully educate our kids on something we'd take a different approach to.
And I agree with the posters who said that a 12 year old should be old enough to not tease a 6 year old about the existence of Santa. |
What is a 12 year old doing with a 6 year old anyway. I wouldn't want some 12 year old neighbour to be hanging out with my 6 year old anyway. That's already the first red flag. It's just weird and the parents of the 12 year old should be more aware of their child and teach him what's appropriate.
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amother
Starflower
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Today at 5:12 pm
| amother Opal wrote: | And my sisters niece who became “educated” in public school (unfortunate situation)
Told her daughter and my girls about relations. My kids were at sisters house and that niece popped in while sister was out.
She gave them a shock and they had many questions lol
It happens. As upsetting as it is. And believe me I was furious. She’s over 18, she had no business telling kids under a certain age about s-xual topics. Especially in our community
Eta-we were told by a rav that legally she did something wrong and I can press charges
But we were advised for our kids sake. |
https://youtu.be/lqouUMUzFLc?s.....CVyl3
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Tao
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Today at 6:15 pm
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My son recently lost his first tooth. I made a big fuss and said "Should we pretend in the night that a fairy will come and swap your tooth for a coin?" He asked "will a fairy really come?" I answered, "Not for real, because tehy don't exist. I will put the coin there for you. But we can imagine that a fairy did it!" He was super excited about it. I don't believe in lying to kids. But no reason they can't enjoy imagining things!
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