Tahara in death | Imamother

↑ Iymnok ↓

Tue, Dec 03 2024, 1:33 pm

1ofbillions wrote:

Anyone else getting the creeps reading this? I’m picturing people touching and handling ny naked body without me being in it.

It's done with the utmost respect. The neshama stays with the body until kevura.
The face is covered and the body is covered. Afterwards the meis is addressed by name and asked for forgiveness of any pain or disrespect.

The neshama isn't creepy. It's purely kadosh.

gr82no

Tue, Dec 03 2024, 1:35 pm

Plonis wrote:

https://www.chabad.org/news/article_cdo/aid/6150640/jewish/The-Painful-Painstaking-Work-of-Israels-Burial-Societies.htm

"Levy says that the chevra kadisha procedure for terror victims is unique. Following the age-old tradition regarding those who were killed for being Jewish, known as kedoshim (“holy ones”), the body is not washed and clothed in white linen as usual.

Instead, it is buried “as is”—bloodied and in the torn, soiled clothing in which the person had been killed, bearing witness to the cruelty that had been done.

And in this case, since the remains sometimes consist of just a skeleton or disconnected body parts, they are often placed in simple wooden coffins. This is in contrast with the longstanding tradition of the Holy Land, where the dead are placed directly into the earth."

Thanks I was wondering why I saw a coffin by a recent levaya in ey when usually it's not

↑ Iymnok

Tue, Dec 03 2024, 1:39 pm

gr82no wrote:

Thanks I was wondering why I saw a coffin by a recent levaya in ey when usually it's not

They use an aron when the body is damaged that it would be painful to see, incomplete or disrespectful. That's why military funerals are usually with an aron.
The aron has holes drilled in the bottom to minimize the separation from the holy ground.

↑ Molly Weasley ↓

Tue, Dec 03 2024, 1:46 pm

zaq wrote:

. They were cremated, honey. In crematoria so huge the smoke cast a pall over the entire area. You didn't know? Towards the end, when the Nazis were trying to get rid of the evidence, the crematoria operated day and night and still couldn't keep up with the backlog of corpses. Amazing how many Germans living in the vicinity "had no idea." Riiiiiight.

Why would it even dawn on you that I don't know this?
We're not talking about ashes, we're talking about bodies, remains that can potentially be given a tharah.
Unfortunately, most of them decomposed.
However, as we have just learned , even if they were not decomposed, they are intentionally buried as they are..

Btw, we don't have a mesorah on burying ashes

↑ Molly Weasley ↓

Tue, Dec 03 2024, 1:52 pm

zaq wrote:

One doesn't exactly "schedule" a tahara. One does it asap. And you can do it when niddah, and you can do it in the daytime. When I joined I was in my early 30s and at least two other members were in their mid to late 30s. I think the only definitely post- menopausal woman was the leader who trained everyone. My friend had a paid job doing taharas when she was in her early 20s.

There are different minhggim about niddah or pregnant

keeptrying ↓

Tue, Dec 03 2024, 3:23 pm

In very out of town communities, many times, young women do taharahs (such as the kollel ladies).

Somethings that are not common knowledge:

There is a special solution that is poured over wounds/cuts that stops blood from oozing out. It makes the area bubble up. Sometimes, some tubing or ports are not taken out- if it causes damage to the body. Many chevra kaddishas include a person with medical background on the team, due to this.

Private parts are washed in a very tznuis way and are only uncovered while being worked on. More about this in the link I provided.

Here is a very clear guide of the halachos:
https://www.jewish-funerals.or.....bers/

Greenapple

Tue, Dec 03 2024, 6:16 pm

keeptrying wrote:

I always wonder if they take out a crown of the tooth when being buried?

Or Ill show up at techiyas hamaysim with it?

↑ keeptrying ↓

Tue, Dec 03 2024, 7:32 pm

Greenapple wrote:

I always wonder if they take out a crown of the tooth when being buried?

Or Ill show up at techiyas hamaysim with it?

They do not take it out... anything thats super invasive, they do not take out. Even catheters, sometimes its a sheilah.

↑ Great ma ↓

Wed, Dec 04 2024, 2:29 am

I don't think it is creepy
I just did shmira for a young friend, it's a very special experience. The feeling I got sitting there was the respect for the guf - how kadosh it was because it had housed her neshama. It was a mind changing, maybe even life changing, experience. In regards to death, Hashem.
I have not done tahara ever but I could understand why the next step would be that we'd want to with utmost respect and appreciation prepare the body for burial.
So choshuv and holy all this experience.
I think posting this question was wanting to hear, to ensure for myself, that it was a respectful process and not demeaning nor invasive.
When I googled it was horrible - the Muslims have an invasive procedure they do called tahara too - I couldn't find any helpful Jewish info so I remembered Imamother.

Thank you everyone.

Ps that link that someone posted doesn't work, that site has been updated and changed and I couldn't see any info on tahara anywhere

Elfrida ↓

Wed, Dec 04 2024, 3:55 am

keeptrying wrote:

They do not take it out... anything thats super invasive, they do not take out. Even catheters, sometimes its a sheilah.

I don't know what happens in other countries, but in Israel any tubing is cut off and clamped about two inches from the body. This is done in the hospital, when the body is washed, before the chevra kadisha collect it.

↑ Elfrida

Wed, Dec 04 2024, 3:56 am

Iymnok wrote:

Those are aronot are also weighted, so one can't tell how much of the body is there and able to be buried.

↑ keeptrying

Wed, Dec 04 2024, 9:42 am

Great ma wrote:

https://www.jewish-funerals.or.....bers/

You have to scroll down

Librarian

Wed, Dec 04 2024, 12:38 pm

Molly Weasley wrote:

Best is to start after menopause. Scheduling gets very complicated otherwise according to many minhagim

I was very happily welcomed into the chevra kadisha in Monsey when I was 37. A woman who is niddah should not be in charge of pouring the water, but there are many tasks necessary that one can do at all times and usually (at least in my experience) only one person was responsible for the water anyway.

↑ Great ma

Thu, Dec 05 2024, 8:24 am

Thank you everyone. That's been so helpful demystifying this 'taboo' topic. It's really a very choshuv topic and as an adult it didn't feel good not knowing what it's all about exactly. We're all going to get to the stage when we transition over to the next world, and death isn't a bad thing, it's a part of being alive, it's something we will all reach one day after 120 beH, and that's OK.
It was so peaceful seeing my friend in peace, she suffered badly in the last few months. Now she's at peace. It's us who are left reeling.

Thank you everyone again

↑ Molly Weasley ↓

Thu, Dec 05 2024, 8:45 am

Librarian wrote:

I've never heard of a way of only having one person pour water, since it has to be a continuous stream to get to tisha kavim, and at least three people actively pour while one stands at the head. That leaves a total of four involved with the water.

There are different minhugim.

GetReal

Thu, Dec 05 2024, 9:18 am

Molly Weasley wrote:

Besides nidda, Pregnant women are also not usually involved in the Tharah

Again, in some small communities there isn’t a choice and the necessity of a kosher tahara overweighs a minhag, especially one that isn’t universal.

↑ Molly Weasley

Thu, Dec 05 2024, 10:03 am

GetReal wrote:

Again, in some small communities there isn’t a choice and the necessity of a kosher tahara overweighs a minhag, especially one that isn’t universal.

True. Based on necessity they may allow pregnant women to join, even though I'm pretty sure pregnancy at tharaht is a pretty universal concern.

Small towns struggle. I've even heard of far out places that unfortunately had to resort to using non-Jews.