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Forum -> Yom Tov / Holidays -> Shabbos, Rosh Chodesh, Fast Days, and other Days of Note
Am I the only one who can’t do it?
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amother
OP  


 

Post Tue, Aug 13 2024, 10:59 pm
Broke my fast today at about 4 o’clock, I was falling apart. Currently nursing a 7 month old. I have never managed to fast while pregnant or nursing. I only try YK and TB but I always end up doing shiurim/breaking it.
When I spoke to my Rav about it he said pregnant and nursing women are not exempt from these fasts so I should fast until I feel so bad that I literally can’t stand anymore.
So my question is this, am I uncommonly weak?
Are most women able to handle fasting while pregnant and/or nursing?
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amother
Lotus


 

Post Tue, Aug 13 2024, 11:04 pm
I’m usually a great faster but when I have a nursing baby it’s total hell! My baby was 8 months old on y’k and I thought I was going to pass out.
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amother
Babyblue


 

Post Tue, Aug 13 2024, 11:06 pm
It's not only you at all. It's the past few generations for sure.
Some people take kalei tzom and really work on the fast starting a week before.
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amother
SandyBrown  


 

Post Tue, Aug 13 2024, 11:06 pm
Same here. Normally a great faster.
When I’m nursing, I literally faint and throw up and can’t move. Pregnant I fast ok.
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amother
Mint


 

Post Tue, Aug 13 2024, 11:06 pm
I'm nursing a 3 month old an had a stomach bug that had me throwing up Shabbos/motzei Shabbos. My Rabbi told me not to fast at all. Being told to fast until you literally can't stand seems harsher than a lot of psakim I've heard of for nursing women (and I wasn't expecting to be told not to fast at all).
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B'Syata D'Shmya




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Aug 13 2024, 11:09 pm
amother OP wrote:
Broke my fast today at about 4 o’clock, I was falling apart. Currently nursing a 7 month old. I have never managed to fast while pregnant or nursing. I only try YK and TB but I always end up doing shiurim/breaking it.
When I spoke to my Rav about it he said pregnant and nursing women are not exempt from these fasts so I should fast until I feel so bad that I literally can’t stand anymore.
So my question is this, am I uncommonly weak?
Are most women able to handle fasting while pregnant and/or nursing?


We are a weak generation in general.
You asked about "most women". Thats a tough one, even a poll wont help you. You are not most women, you are you. You dont need to compare.
Traditionally I am told women did their best and thats it. No need to analyze deeper. You did the best you could and thats that.
Perhaps your blood sugar drops so much that breaking it is saving your life.
When was your last physical exam and blood tests. Perhaps ask your doctor about this.

Try to daven mincha before breaking the fast.
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amother
Mauve


 

Post Tue, Aug 13 2024, 11:10 pm
I’m nursing a four month old and also broke my fast at 4! I’m still not feeling well since I broke the fast. I feel like I’m the only one also!
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amother
  OP  


 

Post Tue, Aug 13 2024, 11:16 pm
Thanks, this is at least validating! I was feeling so guilty, but honestly I’m still in worse shape than my husband who fasted all day.
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amother
  OP


 

Post Tue, Aug 13 2024, 11:18 pm
So thinking about YK, what is in those kalei tzom pills? Unregulated supplements make me nervous…
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amother
Yellow


 

Post Tue, Aug 13 2024, 11:18 pm
Honestly I fasted yesterday at 8 months pregnant and I should have have broken the fast. I got a similiar psak- to fast until I have symptoms I wouldnt normally have on a fast. I stayed in bed for the whole thing and now have extreme leg pain from bad circulation. I could not get any food in post fast and was fighting just to keep water and gaterade down. Not sure I will push myself this hard when I am pp on yk. I might be a strong person and lasted the whole thing without dying but it felt like too much.
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amother
Hibiscus


 

Post Tue, Aug 13 2024, 11:31 pm
fully nursing a nine month old that is barely eating anything and I broke my fast at 2, I was feeling super lightheaded and dizzy.
I am a great faster and I never felt like this before even when nursing a much younger baby.
I've done YK no problem with a 2/3 month old but the tole that nursing such a big baby takes on my body was way too much.
My dayan told me not too even try past chatzos but I got so busy with my kids that I didn't get a chance to break it before 2 when I felt it totally getting to me.
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amother
Indigo


 

Post Tue, Aug 13 2024, 11:37 pm
I’m currently nursing a 6 month old and also broke my fast at 3:00.

I was passing out. Our Rav paskened that nursing moms should only fast when feeling ok. He said I absolutely should eat.

Don’t feel bad
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tichellady




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Aug 13 2024, 11:45 pm
I don’t even try to fast when pregnant or nursing
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amother
DarkGray


 

Post Tue, Aug 13 2024, 11:52 pm
I fasted. I have a six week old baby. My rav said I should. Until six I was feeling fine, the last 2.5 hours I was very weak I was thinking of asking my rav but I decided I made it so far ill just finish.
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simcha12plus




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Aug 13 2024, 11:59 pm
I am a fine faster. But I know some women who really can’t. They prepare in advance. They hire childcare or their husbands know to be HOME all day. EVEN Yom Kippur. Their husbands will stay home.
these women stay in bed all day.

my baby is 5 months kah.
I am fine Bh. My baby, not so much. Cried the last hour of the fast and the first hour after. I think he is just hungry. Hopefully, when he wakes for a feeding, I will have replenished my supply and he will feel happier.

Tomorrow is not a fast day. but often times the day AFTER the fast is harder. Especially with nursing babies.
I might be more tired and more hungry. I will try to eat a little more. But, I have a work day…
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amother
NeonPink


 

Post Wed, Aug 14 2024, 12:03 am
I’m nursing a 2 year old. Had a miserable fast.
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amother
Puce


 

Post Wed, Aug 14 2024, 12:04 am
amother Hibiscus wrote:
fully nursing a nine month old that is barely eating anything and I broke my fast at 2, I was feeling super lightheaded and dizzy.
I am a great faster and I never felt like this before even when nursing a much younger baby.
I've done YK no problem with a 2/3 month old but the tole that nursing such a big baby takes on my body was way too much.
My dayan told me not too even try past chatzos but I got so busy with my kids that I didn't get a chance to break it before 2 when I felt it totally getting to me.


Same here! Also nursing a 9 mo and couldn’t take it anymore at 2 and broke it
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amother
Lilac  


 

Post Wed, Aug 14 2024, 12:06 am
I can only fast when nursing with Kalei Tzom. I have no clue what's in it, but it makes a world of a difference for me. I also drank coconut water this time around ( all Monday long) and fasted amazingly well, BH, despite minimal sleep and nursing a cranky teething infant around the clock.
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amother
Tealblue


 

Post Wed, Aug 14 2024, 12:11 am
amother OP wrote:
Broke my fast today at about 4 o’clock, I was falling apart. Currently nursing a 7 month old. I have never managed to fast while pregnant or nursing. I only try YK and TB but I always end up doing shiurim/breaking it.
When I spoke to my Rav about it he said pregnant and nursing women are not exempt from these fasts so I should fast until I feel so bad that I literally can’t stand anymore.
So my question is this, am I uncommonly weak?
Are most women able to handle fasting while pregnant and/or nursing?

I fast without a problem when not nursing or pregnant but especially when nursing I am totally shot - not only am I not eating or drinking, I am being actively depleted every time I nurse.

So, you are not alone. However, halacha is halacha, and tishav bav and yom Kippur are unlike the other fasts, so we do what we need to (and if that means breaking at some point, or shiurim on YK, that's what we do).

By YK your baby will be 9 months already so hopefully will be eating more so it won't be as bad.
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amother
Buttercup


 

Post Wed, Aug 14 2024, 12:16 am
amother OP wrote:
So thinking about YK, what is in those kalei tzom pills? Unregulated supplements make me nervous…

Tablets of mixed herbs and minerals.
Builds up milk supply.
sufficient supply for several post-fast days.
Prevents dizziness and deheydration.
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