This summer will be the end of me

amother

Vermilion ↓

Fri, Aug 09 2024, 9:59 am

amother Burlywood wrote:

What I don't understand is how is a child not accepted to sleepaway camp? This isn't school. Are there mental health or other problems the teen needs to deal with? As long as you applied on time before things filled up... How do kids get rejected? This doesn't make sense....what kind of camps were you applying to?

I know many girls ages 12-15 not accepted to the BY camps. Its a bed shortage issue.
Camps try hard. They build more cabins, add more beds, accept last minute.
But at the end of the day, if a camp only has room for 500 9th graders and 1000 apply, they can't accept all. They'll accept returning campers first, then returning families, then first come first serve.
But even if they squish some, and even if they try to build, they won't be able to accept everyone.

octopus

Fri, Aug 09 2024, 10:18 am

behappy2 wrote:

Get her videos to watch

Send baby to babysitter for a bit so she can have time with you

See if she can learn a new skill

Right let's send out the 18 month old(!!!) so that mom can babysit the teen. How does that make sense??!!!!

↑ tichellady

Fri, Aug 09 2024, 10:18 am

amother OP wrote:

My house is quiet by 9ish every night and I hang out with her at home. But I should focus on doing more fun things with her. Thank you.

It's not her fault that I have a toddler and it's not my fault that she didn't get into camp and that she was hoping to get in til the last minute that she refused to discuss another plan for second half.

I wasn’t trying to make you feel bad. I’m sure you are doing your best in a hard situation.

amother

↑ Burlywood ↓

Fri, Aug 09 2024, 10:25 am

So which BY camps fill up? We live out OOT. My daughter is getting close to sleep away camp age. I know of Tehilla, Kolos, Camp Bais Yaakov, Chaviva, Agudath, Maarava- are these the camps you are talking about?

amother

↑ Vermilion

Fri, Aug 09 2024, 10:34 am

amother Burlywood wrote:

Yup.

I don't know about all of those camps, but many of them definitely do fill up very quickly. You need to be calling right after Sukkos for applications, and apply as soon as possible.

↑ dankbar ↓

Fri, Aug 09 2024, 10:35 am

It's not feasible that mom should be her personal headcounselor all day, every day. I'm sure when she wants to do a fun activity or outing, she wants it as a family for her other kids to enjoy as well, like when they're after day camp or over weekend.

She can do some adult fun thing with her, here and there, but not all the time.

During day, teen could take along toddler in carriage to go make the grocery order, or do some errands, shopping on her own.

Take care of her appts, like haircut, dentist, doctor, alterations.

Then teen can entertain the younger kids after daycamp, make a daycamp for them, crafts, park, water balloons, play dough, popsticks.

Then mom can buy her adult crafts/hobbies to do on own during day, and she should entertain herself.
Like knitting/crocheting
Needlepoint
Diamond art
Paint by number
Gameboy
Maybe watch videos
Computer games
Crossword puzzles
Jigsaw puzzles
Learn a new language
Write letters
Do some graphics
She can address envelopes for a simcha
Read up on something that interests her
Go to the library

She can go with friends on outings after they come home from their daycamp jobs.

She can learn to play an instrument

Canvas painting

Haircutting course, baking course, sewing course.

↑ dankbar ↓

Fri, Aug 09 2024, 10:42 am

She can visit nursing homes, hospitals, sign up as a chaya lifeline volunteer/kapayim. In summer they always need more help as everyone is away.

She can help tomche shabbos pack packages

If there are places that send pckges to soldiers

She can be a mommy's helper, always more interesting by someone else

Help with gardening

She can do a service type of thing for money let's say put together and set up gift packaging, like chosson Kallah gifts, baby gifts, new mommy gifts, bday gifts, camp pckges

She can take a photography course

With books learn something new like graphology, enneagram

Last edited by dankbar on Fri, Aug 09 2024, 10:59 am; edited 1 time in total

↑ dankbar ↓

Fri, Aug 09 2024, 10:45 am

She can organize, type up mommy's recipes

Take a job in a playgroup if she can't get into a daycamp.

Be a babysitter

Help in a gemach, like sort out clothes,

Help a fundraiser with making calls for donations

↑ dankbar ↓

Fri, Aug 09 2024, 10:56 am

She can tutor kids

She can be a shadow for child in daycamp

She can help headcounselors in daycamp, with prepping costumes, props, stage, sort and distribute supplies, make copies, do graphics for stencils.

She can be mommy helper/babysitter for a staff member in camp/daycamp

She can do graphics/stencils for new teachers for upcoming year

She can be a chaperone for pre-school trips

She can take swim lessons, lessons to be a lifeguard

Dancing classes, aerobics, gymnastics

She can do a family tree, yichus

↑ dankbar ↓

Fri, Aug 09 2024, 11:05 am

What are her interests? What is her personality like?

Can she draft up a script for a performance?

Can she come around to daycamps to do puppet shows, storytelling?

Could she come to daycamps and do some type of food decorating, or art lessons, dance lessons, play music for their dance parties?

Play a guitar for their kumzitses?

Could she organize a small tzedaka function event for women? Or help out to prep for a function by an organization?

amother

Slategray

Fri, Aug 09 2024, 11:09 am

Didn't read through the whole thread...

I would compile a list of options.
Tell her staying home and doing nothing is not a choice.
Present her with the list.
She should choose what appeals most to her.

↑ dankbar ↓

Fri, Aug 09 2024, 11:28 am

Could she take photos of daycamp events and help set up newsletters? Help directors with whatever they need? Sub or be a floater for daycamp counselors, or sent into any classroom that needs help like with dressing kids for swimming, cutting/finishing off crafts, distributing copies/notes/ serving bkfast/lunch.

Can she write articles for magazines?

Go buy shoes/ uniforms/hair accessories/briefcases/school supplies for her little sibs before people come back from the country.

Do online shopping for family

Go choose clothes for self and family in stores or by Gemach.

Take her sibs to appts like doctor, dentist, haircuts.

↑ dankbar ↓

Fri, Aug 09 2024, 11:42 am

Can she draw posters/banners/welcome door signs/ for teachers for upcoming school year?

Help principals set up for school year by decorating school walls, hanging posters, ordering supplies for teachers and setting up classrooms. Ordering craft supplies for preschools

Help with summer food programs, taking attendance by meals? Filling in forms?

Helping stores set up for new season, with unpacking and putting onto shelves/ hanging up their merchandise?

amother

↑ OP ↓

Fri, Aug 09 2024, 12:51 pm

amother DarkRed wrote:

Well I was eaten alive here yesterday for not dropping everything and taking my teen dd to activities because she craves alone time.
My dd is the same, very unpleasant towards other siblings, to the point that I had to actively tell her off and she stormed to her room. So after all my effort to make it positive for her, the day ended with a sour taste.
Would she take out your 18 m.o. to the park if you pay her? Could be a win-win? Babysit for other moms with babies?
Sending you hugs

Thank you I love you lol
I wish you loads of luck. Hold on tight for the ride. Teens are a rollercoaster!

amother

↑ OP ↓

Fri, Aug 09 2024, 12:53 pm

amother Burlywood wrote:

She's a great girl. There's no apply on time before it fills up, it's already full with mostly returning families and then just a few open spots. We just didn't get one of those few.

amother

Babyblue ↓

Fri, Aug 09 2024, 1:27 pm

I wasn’t accepted to camp as a teen with a bunch of excuses while everyone else got in. I have a feeling someone bad mouthed me and to this day at age 40+ I can’t forgive her, because it still hurts.

amother

↑ Apricot

Fri, Aug 09 2024, 1:29 pm

amother Burlywood wrote:

Really hard to get into all. They fill up super fast.