Babies and cats - help!

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Forum -> Hobbies, Crafts, and Collections -> Pets

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amother

OP ↓

Wed, Feb 01 2023, 7:50 pm

DC adopted a cat a few years ago. It was a rescue mission. They are now very very very attached and it's been good for the kids in many ways so ownership of this cat is not at all negotiable even though I can't stand it. It's cute and soft and wonderful and SO SO GROSS. It goes in a litterbox which is nice but then you realize it walks into its own toilet and then tracks that around the house Puke

and sometimes there are accidents or it throws up some of its food in random places around the house.

I have a very very very very very very hard time coping with the fact that this creature who walks in their own waste also walks on my tables and counters and while I wipe down before preparing or serving food I can't be on top of making sure everyone always does and I feel like my life is just disgustingly unsanitary and I'm embarrassed to have my more civilized friends over anymore, ever. But that part is just a pity party that I am resigned to and just trying to get over.

However... new issue... we're having a baby IY"H. This is not something I really unpacked properly before, because at the time we got the cat - 1. I did not realize JUST HOW GROSS it would be and 2. I did not know that we would ever be able to have more children.

And I am freaking out because how can I let a baby crawl around a house that is contaminated by this vile disgusting creature and please do not judge me for calling it that because this is just how I feel and it's hard enough without extra judgment.

There is no way to keep the cat out of anything. Can't keep it out of the kitchen. I can about 90-95% keep it out of my bedroom but not 100%. There is no way I'd be able to make a cat-free baby zone or a baby-free cat zone. I do not want icky animals on my baby and I do not want my baby picking up cat vomit or feces before I realize it's there! Help! Please help. I'm really anxious about this.

amother

Orchid

Wed, Feb 01 2023, 7:52 pm

You need to put some boundaries down. Most people don't allow their cats on counters and tables.

amother

Burntblack ↓

Wed, Feb 01 2023, 7:52 pm

The cat should not be walking on tables and counters! Get some spray bottles pronto.

Also you shouldn't be dealing with the litter when pregnant, so I hope it's someone else's job.

amother

↑ OP ↓

Wed, Feb 01 2023, 7:57 pm

I refuse to have anything to do with litter, ever. So no specific pregnancy problem. Like I said, animals gross me out.

I was under the impression that the counters and tables are a lost cause. I've heard it from many people, even if you think you've trained them they'll go there as soon as you're not looking. But if there's anything I should know please do share because it's soooooo disgusting. Personally I shoo it off every time I see it but that doesn't stop it from coming right back so I've half given up.

But even if there is some strategy it probably wouldn't work for me because DH and several DC do not take my grossed-out-ness seriously and keep spoiling the cat.

amother

Sage

Wed, Feb 01 2023, 8:05 pm

No ideas only sympathy. My kids know from the day they are born that the only living creatures allowed in my house are human beings. It's not easy considering we live OOT where many of their friends have pets - dogs, cats, hamsters and some other interesting creatures. Our neighbors cats often make their way to my garden which is pretty big, but as soon as I come home they run out.

amother

↑ Burntblack

Wed, Feb 01 2023, 8:09 pm

amother OP wrote:

Some ideas here:
https://www.google.com/amp/s/w.....amp=1
Anything that makes noise when they jump on the counter will work, like aluminum foil. They're also not supposed to like citrus scent, so you can try scenting your surfaces with lemon juice.

vintagebknyc

Wed, Feb 01 2023, 8:15 pm

Spray bottles do not work and are punitive, neither does shaking a can that makes noise.

Go to YouTube and look up Jackson Galaxy--warning, he's eccentric with lots of piercings and tattoos--however, he's a well-known and very well respected cat behavioralist who specializes in hard to handle cat problems. He works with the hardest cases and always gets the cats to behave better.

amother

↑ OP

Wed, Feb 01 2023, 8:32 pm

Thanks.
I don't think noise would help, there's always stuff on the counter and he has no issues going on crinkly bags or papers.
I can try citrus though I'm doubtful. I haven't seen him avoid anything in particular. He's all over. I hate it.
I'll look up that you tube guy and maybe pay him everything I've got.... though again I don't know if there's anything to do without family buy-in. But it's something to look up so I will.

But anyway even if I can get the cat to stay out of the kitchen, that doesn't help the fact that iyh in a best case scenario we will still have a creepy crawling baby licking the floor where the cat hangs out.

I plan to put a baby gate around the cat food and litter box to keep the baby out of those, but cats can get into and out of everything so the house is still going to be a free for all.

#BestBubby

Wed, Feb 01 2023, 8:36 pm

OP, millions of Americans have cats and babies - it is not dangerous.

In fact, babies exposed to cats are less likely to have allergies.

B'Sha'a Tova!

amother

Canary

Wed, Feb 01 2023, 9:06 pm

#BestBubby wrote:

OP, millions of Americans have cats and babies - it is not dangerous.

In fact, babies exposed to cats are less likely to have allergies.

B'Sha'a Tova!

This!

Feel good OP. Beshaah tovah.

FTR, my baby loves our kitties and picks up way more germs in playgroup than from the kitties.

imasinger

Thu, Feb 02 2023, 3:33 am

I say the following without any judgment of you as a person. We all have our quirks, and I respect you for being upfront about yours. But we also often can choose whether or not to let strong feelings get in the way of our lives.

You can designate a few cat free rooms if you want. Cats can't open a closed door. And you can mop and vacuum more frequently if you like -- or insist that the cat loving family members do so.

But, when it comes to letting an older baby crawl, you might also want to work on your own squeamishness. Saying, "That cat used a litter box and is now spreading awful fecal germs all over the surfaces of the house" is like saying, "I used the bathroom, and now I'm spreading fecal germs all over the house."

1. The scatter is usually from the clean litter that was used to cover the mess.

2. Just as we wash our hands, cats clean themselves regularly.

There are more facts of this nature, but I don't want to overwhelm you.

Given the extreme nature of your expressions of dislike, I'd encourage you to either consider getting counseling to help you work past your visceral fear and disgust (CBT is great for that); or else, put your foot down hard about finding the cat another home.

I'm far more worried about the psychological health of a baby coming into a household where half the family loves a pet and Mom thinks it's vile, disgusting, unsanitary, gross, an embarrassment to anyone refined, and more. That dynamic is far more unhealthy than hairballs.

watergirl

Thu, Feb 02 2023, 3:39 am

vintagebknyc wrote:

Spray bottles do not work and are punitive, neither does shaking a can that makes noise.
.

I’m not saying I agree with this method, but - my mom used a tzedakka can with a few coins in it to keep her cat off the table. She started by shaking it to scare the cat off the table and then just left the can on the table always. It was pretty mean. But she had extremely severe OCD (diagnosed and medicated) and she needed the cat, so this worked for her.

BadTichelDay

Thu, Feb 02 2023, 3:52 am

Our kids have adopted a stray kitten a few months ago. It is now grown up and lives exclusively inside the house. We have a day-night arrangement. During the day, the cat with litterbox, food, water toys and all is kept solely behind closed doors in the two connected children's rooms. The children can play with it there if they want. During the night, so that it doesn't disturb the kids' sleep by prowling and jumping around, it gets moved to the living room/kitchen area, with all its equipment. It does jump on tables and counters, but in the morning, when it moves back to the kids's rooms, one can just wipe critical surfaces down easily. If we had a baby, I'd just keep the baby wherever the cat is not at that time and maybe wipe/sweep through before letting the baby on the floor.

amother

Navy

Thu, Feb 02 2023, 4:00 am

We fostered a cat recently and I just want to say, I feel for you. I also hated having it in my house, especially when it would climb onto the table every time we ate and try to eat off our plates.

amother

Viola

Thu, Feb 02 2023, 4:01 am

I am the same way about all pets
They don’t belong in my home
Is there an area in the basement that you can designate the cat’s room
The cat only leaves that room if someone is with it at all times, or it goes outdoors when it’s not too cold

amother

Silver

Thu, Feb 02 2023, 4:02 am

I don’t know. People here mentioned cats shouldn’t be on counters or tables. In every home I’ve been to, with a cat, at one point or the other the car jumped onto the table . Usually while people are eating .

sequoia

Thu, Feb 02 2023, 4:07 am

Cats are actually good for you.

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