Making after toilet trained

amother

Tue, Jan 22 2008, 9:34 am

My son is 2 1/2 and has been toilet trained for 4 months. I think it is a matter of laziness... he makes in his underpants a bit before he goes to the potty. I try to remind him, I ask him if he needs to go. no no no. I'll see him jumping around his chair (he needs to go) but refuses. I'll take his pants off as he is screaming and then sometimes he will go. I've tried positive reinforcement. I have tried putting him in diapers (teaching consequence) but nothing works. For at least 2 months he had no accidents after he was trained. Then it started. And sometimes it gets excessive and he'll make through 3 layers. PLEASE HELP with ideas. I am going nuts!!!!

BlumaG

Tue, Jan 22 2008, 1:12 pm

I am sorry I have no advice for u right now but I can truly sypathize with you.
my 4 yr old is going thru a lazy stage that she'll wet herself at least once a wk, its driving me crazy, todayi made her wash the floor where she peed. maybe that'll help, give her hte responsibility.

ChossidMom

Wed, Jan 30 2008, 12:27 pm

Sounds to me like he's just not ready. Maybe just put him back in diapers.
My 4 year old has never gotten completely trained. She says "no" alot about going to the bathroom, but once she's there she'll usually make. We had a few weeks where she really was having accidents left, right and center. Including dirtying her panties. Now, if she dirties I wash her in cold water, dress her and punish her. I put her on a chair in her room till I tell her she can come out.
Also, I prize her for everything. Pee pees get her a toffee. If she poohs in the toilet she gets a big pekaleh. This is something that my parenting teacher taught me and may work for you, amother. Make a big pekaleh and keep it in a visible place in the kitchen. Whenever someone asks about it tell them that it is for Yanky (or whatever) for when he poohs in the toilet. Even if he makes just a little bit - he gets the pekaleh. Also, don't get visibly angry with him when he makes in his pants. You have to be very matter of fact with him. You see, it's all a control issue and he is showing you who's boss. He WANTS to get a rise out of you.

Hang in there. 2 1/2 is actually young. I don't think I've ever trained before 3.

madys

Wed, Jan 30 2008, 1:19 pm

Amother, please don't punish your child for making a bit in his underwear - just make sure to be extra loving and excited when he does go to the bathroom in time. Also, don't put diapers back on him, that just sends a mixed message.

2.5 is young for a boy to be trained, maybe he just needs a bit more time to fully understand what his body is telling him.

You can try a sticker chart - something like this - everyday he is completely dry, he gets a sticker, and then erev shabbos, he gets a special treat or toy. Continue for a few weeks until he is a pro.

I follow the "you get more bees with honey" approach.

Good luck!