What is the funniest/ embarrassing thing your child said...

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↑ amother ↓

Mon, Jan 27 2014, 2:56 pm

I was trying on my new Aquamodesta swim dress when a female neighbor knocked on the door.
My DS told her, "my mommy can't come to the door now bc she's in her bathing suit!"
embarrassed

I rushed to the door to show my neighbor that I was not parading around in a typical bathing suit.

Success10

Mon, Jan 27 2014, 3:00 pm

yalimommy wrote:

I showed my DD when she was 4 or 5 a picture of Bila'am looking over the tents of B'nei Yisrael.

I told her, "look, this man is the one who said "mah tovu ohalecha Ya'akov".

She looked puzzled and said, "You mean THAT"S Yaakov Shwekey???"

This really happened? This might just be the funniest story on this thread!

↑ yalimommy

Tue, Jan 28 2014, 3:30 am

Yup, actually happened!

↑ amother ↓

Mon, Feb 03 2014, 4:24 am

I was once at my brother in laws house (my husbands brother) and my husband was not with me and my sister in law was in a different room. anyway my brother in law was leaving to go daven and my 4 yr old nephew said wait and ran to give him a hug and kiss before he left. my nephew then turned to me and said, "go give tatty a hug and kiss" AWKWARD embarrassed

lol I thought it was really funny though

↑ FranticFrummie

Mon, Feb 03 2014, 4:58 am

amother wrote:

I was trying on my new Aquamodesta swim dress when a female neighbor knocked on the door.
My DS told her, "my mommy can't come to the door now bc she's in her bathing suit!"
embarrassed

I rushed to the door to show my neighbor that I was not parading around in a typical bathing suit.

This reminds me of when DD was 4. I work from home, and I have to sign for a LOT of packages. I had a great relationship with my mail man, and he knew not to ask me to sign on Shabbos or holidays. He'd just hold the packages for me until I could sign for them. He always stopped to chat with DD, and was generally a great guy.

One day it was around 102 degrees, and the air conditioner was barely making a dent in the heat. I was sitting around in a long skirt and a tank top, sweating to death. I keep a long sleeve button down shirt on a hook by the front door, in case anyone comes by.

So, the mailman shows up and knocks on my door. Before I could say anything, DD yells out "Just a minute, mommy needs to put a shirt on!" Surprised

I buttoned up my over shirt, and the poor mail man could NOT look me in the eye! You've never seen a big, black man blush so hard in your life. He looked like he wanted the ground to swallow him up. He shoved the package at me, I signed, and he took off at full speed.

The next day I explained about the over shirt, and he looked SO relieved! It still took a few days before he could look at me again, though.

I thought it was very sweet that there are still men out there with that kind of sensitivity.

↑ amother ↓

Mon, Feb 03 2014, 5:39 am

amother wrote:

first time seeing a black person...

I was 3 and I said to my mother.. ma look a toasted man...

First time my brother saw a brown cow, "so this is where chocolate milk comes from?"

↑ amother ↓

Mon, Feb 03 2014, 5:43 am

As a SAHM, I made full 5 course dinners, but when I began working, I made once a week 'pizza night'. My son's teacher asked the class, how many of you have pizza for supper. My son proudly replied, "we have pizza for supper, every night". Humiliating.

cinnamon

Mon, Feb 03 2014, 6:20 am

amother wrote:

You made 5 course dinners every night? Wow!

↑ amother ↓

Fri, Feb 07 2014, 2:51 am

My 1 year old was doing what he does best, unpacking my bathroom undersibk cabinet. He hands my 5 year old son a package of pads. My son starts to laugh and says yay, he gave us a package of panties. Interesting...

shosh

Fri, Feb 07 2014, 4:26 am

Here's a silly story:

About a 100 years ago, when I was at kindergarten in suburban south London, my best friend was a little half-Israeli girl called Sharon and we were the only Jews in the class.

I don't remember this, but my mother told me that one day, they brought a photographer to the kindergarten to take pictures of all the kids. For some reason, the day before, when she and Sharon's mum arrived to take us home, Sharon and I were running around shouting at the top of our voices, "The tochis, the tochis, the tochis is coming." For some reason, we thought that the photographer was known as "the tochis." Quite why, I don't know, and from which of our homes (probably both) had we heard the word "tochis". Anyway, Mum and Sharon's mum were rolling around with laughter, at the same times as telling us to be quiet and more mannerly, while all the non-Jewish mothers couldn't understand what was funny at all.

↑ amother ↓

Fri, Jun 20 2014, 4:46 pm

my son answered a phone call from my friend and said youre 'brown friend is on the phone.
she laughed

↑ amother ↓

Fri, Jun 20 2014, 5:16 pm

my son has sensory issues and for some reason finds touching his chest very soothing. every so often he'll make a comment about "mommy having bigger ones than him" but when I had a bunch of guest over for a meal and he starts touching me and saying "mommy has bigger things on her belly than me and daddy" and everyone was quiet for a minute and then just pretended they never heard him say anything.

↑ amother ↓

Sat, Jun 21 2014, 8:45 pm

I was at the dr with ds , almost 3 at the time.
Dr: where is your long hair going to go after your upsherin?
Ds: were gonna put it in mommys sheitel LOL

↑ amother ↓

Sat, Jun 21 2014, 9:37 pm

Friday night we were eating with my sister and family. Father makes kiddush and hands out grape juice / wine. My 4 yr old nephew, who is slightly precocious, grabs his little becher and says loudly "Great, my whisky", and downs it in one!

We were crying with laughter, especially as he does not come from a home where they drink and we have no idea where he heard it, maybe at shul?

Amother because my sis is on here and it was her kid.

ruby slippers

Sat, Jun 21 2014, 10:59 pm

Erev Yom Kippur at our seudah our 12 year old ds turns to me asked, so are you going to sleep in the basement or is abba. I asked why, he said his rebbi said one of the things you can't do is husbands and wives don't sleep together. (in elemtary school they seem to skip this one) After YK we called the rebbi to find out exactly what was said and then dh had a real talk with my ds. dh explained this is private and not something really discussed in friends etc. he told him don't worry I am not telling anyone about that! of course he could not look at me without blushing for few days.

Ashrei ↓

Sat, Jun 21 2014, 11:19 pm

"Oh! Oh! Rabbi's here!"
My 2yo at an empty cafe when a man with a long white beard walked in the door.

(As I was shushing him, he continued to say "hi rabbi!")

↑ Ashrei ↓

Sat, Jun 21 2014, 11:30 pm

Oh and when my then 3yo son peed standing up for one of the first times,I told him,"wow you're such a big boy!"

To which he replied, "yeah! And soon I'll poop standing up too!"

Shopmiami49

Sun, Jun 22 2014, 2:48 am

I asked ds (4 yrs) if his music teacher spoke to them in English or b'ivrit and he smiled this huge smile and said jokingly "In Hebrrrew!!" (rolling his r) and then proceeded to crack himself up and laughed until he fell off his chair. LOL

Gotta love him!

↑ amother ↓

Sun, Jun 22 2014, 3:21 am

My four year old very loudly, and very randomly proclaimed to my grandmother " my mommy doesnt have a pee-pee!"

My friend explained to her daughter that Hashem creates people in all colors, shapes and sizes, and that he loves them all and so should we. Shortly after, she saw a black man passing in the street and she yells loudly, "mommy, that man is black and I love him!"

pobody's nerfect

Sun, Jun 22 2014, 9:01 am

Just after washing for the shabbos meal to which we had invited an older and very proper couple, my still not potty trained 3 1/2 year old son piped up "I have diarrhea!" When nobody responded, he just kept repeating himself louder and louder and louder. Mortifying. FYI when I changed him.... It was just regular poop.

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