Ketubah | Imamother

Shimmysmom

Tue, Jul 11 2006, 11:32 am

inspired by the hanging your wedding pic in the living room thread:
I have heard many people say that you shouldn't hang up your kesubah for tznius reasons. we did not but what do you all think?

Basya

Tue, Jul 11 2006, 11:39 am

I think that your kesuba is not something you really want to look at. If you think about it- It talks about what happens if one of you CH''V dies or if you get divorced. You hope that you never have to check it up! My husband got a beautiful one but I don't really understand the point of it.

↑ amother ↓

Tue, Jul 11 2006, 11:42 am

did you know that if you were divorced your ketubah would say

100 kessef !

if you were never married you would get 200 bucks~!

during the ceremony your kettubah is read out loud !

I have heaqrd of storys that in order not to embarass a divorcee

the rabbi caughed when he said the amount !

Nomad ↓

Tue, Jul 11 2006, 11:55 am

from what I understood - some sephardim have the minhag of hanging up their kesubah

in a way its funny because its like hanging a prenup on the wall

but it does have some logic - because it constantly reminds the guy- this is what would happen if we split up - so lets be good!

and some of them are so pretty! if it was my minhag - I totally would put it up!

chocolate moose ↓

Tue, Jul 11 2006, 12:06 pm

and if you were a BT and got married not a virgin, would you like everyone to see that, too?

chen ↓

Tue, Jul 11 2006, 12:20 pm

but if you were? don't plenty of wedding invitations say "hakalloh habsuloh hamehulloloh"? (though I personally think this is in quite poor taste--it's no one's business whether she is or she isn't.) maybe that's not in style any more--I haven't paid attention recently.

in any case, they read the kesuboh loud and clear at all the chasunohs I've been to--that's still in style--and they don't cough when they say "besulto do".

↑ DefyGravity ↓

Tue, Jul 11 2006, 12:23 pm

SaraG wrote:

and if you were a BT and got married not a virgin, would you like everyone to see that, too?

I think we discussed this here recently, but you don't have to write that the girl wasn't a virgin.

↑ amother ↓

Tue, Jul 11 2006, 12:55 pm

how would a ketubah be written up differently

if you are a bt?????I think it would be the same.

shabbatiscoming

Tue, Jul 11 2006, 12:57 pm

some ppl have beautiful ketubot made and I dont really think that anyone goes over and really reads the ketuba, its just pretty to look at it.

ours was not filled in properly so we had a copied one filled in so its not pretty to hang but I would have loved to have it in the living room.

↑ chocolate moose ↓

Tue, Jul 11 2006, 12:58 pm

Defy, just b/c the h.com'nicks say that, doesn't make it true.

In C.h. ALL the kesuvos are read "off the mike".

↑ Motek

Tue, Jul 11 2006, 1:00 pm

chen wrote:

don't plenty of wedding invitations say "hakalloh habsuloh hamehulloloh"? (though I personally think this is in quite poor taste--it's no one's business whether she is or she isn't.)

The kesuba is read out loud, usually into a mike, in front of all the guests. Apparently those being the mesader kiddushin don't think it's a problem though perhaps they are more circumspect in situations where the kalla is not a besula.

p.s. the two Kesuba threads were merged

Last edited by Motek on Tue, Jul 11 2006, 1:00 pm; edited 1 time in total

↑ DefyGravity

Tue, Jul 11 2006, 1:09 pm

SaraG wrote:

Defy, just b/c the h.com'nicks say that, doesn't make it true.

In C.h. ALL the kesuvos are read "off the mike".

This isn't info I got off of H.com, I have friends that spoke to their Rav and were told that their kesubah could still say besulah.

↑ chocolate moose

Tue, Jul 11 2006, 1:28 pm

That's totally bogus. To call a spade a spade...when it isn't!

↑ didan

Tue, Jul 11 2006, 4:44 pm

B"H

SaraG wrote:

Defy, just b/c the h.com'nicks say that, doesn't make it true.

In C.h. ALL the kesuvos are read "off the mike".

Not at weddings in CH I've been too. Kesubos are read into the mike.

↑ Crayon210 ↓

Tue, Jul 11 2006, 4:48 pm

SaraG wrote:

Defy, just b/c the h.com'nicks say that, doesn't make it true.

What if the h.com'nicks put it on a poster and hang it up? Then is it true? Tongue Out

↑ Crayon210 ↓

Tue, Jul 11 2006, 4:49 pm

Apparently the kesuba can say besula, even if untrue, if the husband agrees.

ny21 ↓

Tue, Jul 11 2006, 7:18 pm

I FEEl that it is not fair that a person who was married before only gets 100 8)

↑ Crayon210

Tue, Jul 11 2006, 7:30 pm

Why?

If a person has previously had relations, her body is different than the body of a girl who hasn't (in most cases).

That has a certain "value".