Shaitel Financing | Imamother

shalhevet

Wed, Jun 07 2006, 7:27 pm

mother48 wrote:

if you live in an area that has a local gemach, maybe borrow the $$ there, and pay them off slowly as you can

I really have to ask.

Do you think it's moral to borrow money from a gemach to buy a 2000 dollar sheitel? Exploding anger

If you haven't got the money now save up every month the payment you would have made to the gemach.
And if you still can't afford it, then how are you going to return the money? So you'll just have to buy a cheaper sheitel. (I usually pay around 1000-1200 shekels for a blend (about 300 dollars)).
When someone needs urgent dental/medical treatment or needs to make a bris or buy food for Shabbos, should they find there's no money in the gemach because you bought a fabulous sheitel?

mimsy7420

Wed, Jun 07 2006, 9:34 pm

mumsy23 wrote:

I do not think it is up to any of us to decide what should be priority for somebody else.

One's sheital is their hair, their face and their looks. This is very important ot some people (including me). It is very hard for me to have to cover my hair and I don't think there is anything wrong with me wanting the best I can get. For many women it is their emotional health that is at stake, and tnobody can put a price on that.

I agree.

I'm sorry that the anonymous amother does not understand my need to buy the best shaitel - but frankly - I do not understand how you can wear a 100$ one! I'm not trying to offend you - I'm just trying to say that for some girls it is such a drastic change in itself to wear a shaitel at all - that buying a beatutiful expensive one eases the transition. Anyways maybe we can chalk it up to hidor mitzva.

shalhevet

Thu, Jun 08 2006, 3:27 am

mumsy23 wrote:

I do not think it is up to any of us to decide what should be priority for somebody else.

Who said that?
If people have the money then, behatzlocho!
But posters are saying they don't have the money and/or they should borrow to buy a luxury item. Then it's not a priority just for someone else.

Quote:

Anyways maybe we can chalk it up to hidor mitzva.

I hope these shaitels are in the boundaries of tzniyus that Rabbonim have fixed. It's hard for me to believe that such expensive shaitels are tzanua. And even if they are, this is a ridiculous statement. It's like saying it's hidur mitzva to buy yourself a 10,000 dollar dress. You have to wear clothes too.
(For those who feel they couldn't cover their hair without such an expensive shaitel - I wasn't intending to talk to you. Obviously it depends on where someone's coming from. I'm only writing to those who would cover their hair anyway.)

PinkandYellow

Thu, Jun 08 2006, 7:53 am

It doesn't have to do with looks only. When I got married I had a very cheap sheital, it was such a busha to wear, thick and knotty and coarse, and besides it was the most uncomfortable thing I would take it off b/4 leaving work (bec I had to wear it to work). After 6 mths my mil bought me a $1600 georgie headband fall. this was 4 years ago. its still in amazing condition (I've heard they can last up to 7 yrs so its actually worth it monetarily) but besides taht its even more comfortable then the snood I wear! it is lighter and the cap is more comfortable. so its the looks alot but also that its more comfortable. oh, and also since I only wear it when going out with dh, and sometimes shabbos/yom tov, its like wearing makeup or a nice outfit- basically its much nicer for dh to see me in my georgie then a $200 mop.

TzenaRena

Thu, Jun 08 2006, 8:02 am

Sheitels were always expensive. It always took a committment to find the money for one. I read a story about how the Lubavitcher Rebbe sponsored the money for not one but two sheitlach for a kallah who was hesitant about covering her hair with a sheitel. Two because you need one for Shabbos..... This was in the earlier years, when all sheitlach were human hair, and they were an expense at that time too.

Good quality Mezuzahs are expensive too, and no one would suggest that we skimp on the cost. One should be ready to spend for a mitzvah, and a sheitel is no exception.

Although the price for the best customs now can be pretty exorbitant, there are more moderately priced ones that are beautiful too. The RamBam advocates the derech hamitzua , the middle road for most things, including the apparel of a person. [See Kitzur Shulchan Aruch ch.3 par.3]

At this point, if most women in a community are wearing customs it is a legitimate expenditure to get a good quality custom that is in the middle of the price spectrum. It is not a good idea to wear cheap looking sheitels any more than to wear cheap looking attire in general. [Kitzur SA ch.3,par.3]

Don't forget that in the summer heat, synthetics can be heavy and hot. It's really a blessing that the lighter human hair customs make this mitzvah easier to keep now, removing one more temptation or excuse for not wearing a sheitel.

mummyof6 wrote:

hope these shaitels are in the boundaries of tzniyus that Rabbonim have fixed. It's hard for me to believe that such expensive shaitels are tzanua. And even if they are, this is a ridiculous statement. It's like saying it's hidur mitzva to buy yourself a 10,000 dollar dress. You have to wear clothes too.

About tznius, it really has nothing to do with the quality or "customness" of the sheitel , but only with its style, which is the same for any type of sheitel.

mumsy23

Thu, Jun 08 2006, 9:14 am

Quote:

[quote="mummyof6"]

mumsy23 wrote:

I do not think it is up to any of us to decide what should be priority for somebody else.

To some people it is not considered a luxury but a neccesity. I don't understand how some women walk around looking like shmatas and IMHO a cheap sheital really adds to the 'shmata' look. For myself, if I don't look nice, I feel like a different person to the point that it can really bring me down emotional. Maybe I am vain, but I think that a lot of women can relate to the idea of needing to look good and needing there hair to look 'normal', not like they have a mop on their head. As I said above, this is not a matter of physical health (for which anyone would say, borrow whatever you need to maintain that) but a matter of emotional health. When everyone is walking around with a flowy, light and natural looking sheital, it can really effect a woman's self esteem.

Quote:

Anyways maybe we can chalk it up to hidor mitzva.

I hope these shaitels are in the boundaries of tzniyus that Rabbonim have fixed. It's hard for me to believe that such expensive shaitels are tzanua. And e

like Sarahd said, what does physical modesty have to do with the price?

Quote:

even if they are, this is a ridiculous statement. It's like saying it's hidur mitzva to buy yourself a 10,000 dollar dress. You have to wear clothes too.

Sorry but, it is un reasonable and not really accepted to spend 10,000 dollars on a dress, however, $2,000 on a sheital is baisicly the norm so that is not a good comparison.

Also, I agree with the above woman who say the more expensive ones are not just nicer, but much more comfortable and easier to wear. My MIL tells stories of the kind of mops she had to wear on her head. Not only did she say that she would never wear makeup or contacts or nice clothes because she felt so ugly in her sheital, she didn't bother being put together, because she would look horrible anyway (what an awful attitude to have to live with!) She also said that they were so uncomfortable and heavy, she would have headaches everyday!

IMHO, I don't care if you have to borrow and pay back for the next two years, a nice sheital is definitly a priority and worth borrowing for!

ceo

Thu, Jun 08 2006, 10:21 am

Well, to get back to the original question of finding a nice shetl at a reasonable price, I highly suggest you check out Judy wigs. They have a line called Y2K. The wigs are mostly European hair with a bit of Asian in it, and honestly, you cannot tell at all, and it looks like your typical European hair shetl. But it was $500! and I get compliments on it all the time.

Another idea- don't laugh- have you checked ebay? Once, just for fun, I took a look, and there was a seller who had european hair shetls for reasonable prices.

mimsy7420

Thu, Jun 08 2006, 10:37 am

Quote:

I hope these shaitels are in the boundaries of tzniyus that Rabbonim have fixed. It's hard for me to believe that such expensive shaitels are tzanua.

I'm sorry that it's hard for you believe that such expensive shaitels are tzanua, but please don't insult those of us who do wear such shaitels and question whether they are in fact tznius. Every single one of my friends got a beautiful shaitel to prepare them for their wedding - and they are all tznius girls and would proudly wear their shaitel in front of any rabbi.

Quote:

And even if they are, this is a ridiculous statement. It's like saying it's hidur mitzva to buy yourself a 10,000 dollar dress. You have to wear clothes too.

No that is a ridiculous statement. Imagine you only had a choice between 2 dresses in the whole world. One was not flattering and cheap and one looked attractive on but was expensive. Which one would you choose?They are both perfectly tznius. When your husband goes to choose a himself an esrog for sukkos does he go buy the cheapest one he can find? No, every man looks for the nicest most beautiful esrog - because that is hidor mitzvah.

Quote:

(For those who feel they couldn't cover their hair without such an expensive shaitel - I wasn't intending to talk to you. Obviously it depends on where someone's coming from. I'm only writing to those who would cover their hair anyway.)

It has nothing to do with what a person's intends to do - it's about making the mitzvah beautiful for yourself, and to make the transition into marriage a little easier and to feel good about yourself. Why should someone whose mother covered her hair her whole life and knew she would also too, wear an ugly shaitel - while the person who wants to take on the mitzvah for herself get to wear a beautiful one? Are you saying you are on a lower level if you wear an expensive shaitel????

DefyGravity

Thu, Jun 08 2006, 10:38 am

mommyabc123 wrote:

ceo, I've seen ppl in those sheitels and they look so nice!

I don't see why there is only a "cheap" one for $100 or an expensive one for $2000 - there is a lot in the middle and honestly, A LOT depends on the cut.

Exactly, I know many many people that buy $500-$800 sheitals and they look GREAT and they're happy with them. The cut is very important. My Michal looked ok, and then I finally got it re-cut and it made a huge difference. On the rare occassion that I wear it, people assume that it's a higher end shaitel. Even more so with the Michal fall, generally people just think it's my real hair.

BrachaC

Thu, Jun 08 2006, 10:38 am

Along the same lines as the previous poster, try talking to local shaitel machers about gently used sheitels. Not every sheitel is good for each person. I bought a contessa by Claire off of a friend for $500 two years ago and it is the best sheitel I ever had. I got to try it on for longer and make sure it was really comfortable and that dh liked it etc. And you cannot beat that price! Many times people will tell their sheitel macher if they need to get rid of a sheitel that was just wrong for them, but nothing inherently wrong with the sheitel. Also, then you might be able to work out a payment plan with the owner of the sheitel. If she is not getting anything out of owning it, she might be willing to accept post-dated checks.

roza

Thu, Jun 08 2006, 10:50 am

Yes, I was able to work out a payment plan for my 700$ sheitel, I paid in 3 installments.

Quote:

it's an investment in a lifetime of keeping the mitzvah properly, and happily, with assurance of brochos for the entire family.

Like any investment- it can loose loose it's value. Sheitel business is a gamble. Buying 1,000 sheitle is a gamble. But a women will cover her hair anyway. So the fact that she covers her hair PROPERLY will bring her brochos for the family, not the fact that she spend a 1,000 or any amount for the sheitel.