Chutzniks? anyone else's dh's going to EY for Lag B'Omer?

wanderer

Mon, May 11 2009, 7:34 pm

Do you ladies mind me asking? I'm really curious why you're all afraid of being home alone...?

Just wondering.

ra_mom

Mon, May 11 2009, 7:49 pm

colorful! wrote:

Do you ladies mind me asking? I'm really curious why you're all afraid of being home alone...?

Just wondering.

This is the first time that dh went anywhere without me, so I am not used to falling asleep without dh in the next bed!

Mama Bear

Mon, May 11 2009, 8:04 pm

everyuthing is a lot scarier at night. every bump, sound, smell... ch'v if there's an emergency... the night is a scary time, I need a 2nd person in my house then... it's hard.

windowsill

Mon, May 11 2009, 8:19 pm

colorful! wrote:

Do you ladies mind me asking? I'm really curious why you're all afraid of being home alone...?

Just wondering.

Me really not afraid of bieng home alone, just as MB said, noises, emergencies C"V, and its all psychological I think, when you know he is unreachable and you are the only adult in charge.. usually dh comes home when Im asleep, so I really am psycho!!

Twizzlers

Mon, May 11 2009, 9:04 pm

I feel for all you alone ladies....at least you have music to keep you company for the next 24 hours

windowsill

Mon, May 11 2009, 9:41 pm

Twizzlers wrote:

I feel for all you alone ladies....at least you have music to keep you company for the next 24 hours

That's true! here its nearly 3am and can't sleep, but am glued to my MP3 and to the comp!

Mama Bear

Mon, May 11 2009, 10:56 pm

and back to the original topic,

Bedtime was very tough tonight. I made the mistake of taking a break between putting the kids to be so when mendy woke, shimie was not yet in pj's & he kept making a racket & waking Mendy up & I was very tense when I hustled him into bed. I feel bad! Tomorrow night I'll be better oganized. the house is flying now. tomorrow I'll stay in and clean up. Oy. 4 more such nights!!

Tova

Tue, May 12 2009, 12:06 am

I'm with Mama Bear and company.

MB, it's OK and it's a beautiful thing.

I understand 100% and I am the one chalishing to go to E"Y...so I am iy"H going next week for 8 days, taking the baby and leaving my toddler by my parents (he will see my husband every morning and evening). We actually asked an eitza and I was very much encouraged to go. I plan on going to the Kosel every morning and evening iy"H as well as Kever Rachel and some other trips. Hardly "jetsetting around the world."

I was last in E"Y 8 years ago when I went to kevarim all over davening for a shidduch and getting berachos from gedolim (I was only 20 but really wanted to find my bashert). My shidduch was redt while I was in E"Y and we were engaged 2 months later, b"H.

So I do find it very meaningful to go back after Hashem has showered me with so many brachos.

My husband is not coming along as a) it's during the z'man and b) even if we'd go during bein hazmanim it would triple the cost in just airfare alone and my husband feels he can get more accomplished in learning bein hazmanim staying here and not traveling. So this is really the best thing for us.

windowsill

Tue, May 12 2009, 4:32 am

Night no. 2 was much better! Slept for 5 hours straight!! kids woke me up all dressed and ready to go on outing - they were so cute! (usually I have to stand on top of them to get dressed!)
Anyway, off to work now - MB thanks a mil for starting this thread, although I am miles away from you all, I still feel very safe and connected - someplace where we all share the same thing for this week...

Mama Bear

Tue, May 12 2009, 8:44 am

hat a night. Fell asleep at 12:30 a.m. and was awoken by my miracles at... 1, 1:30, 4, 5, and 6;30. Mendy got up at 7:40. I'm exhausted. Another nap is in order today.`

But today I'm very emotional. It's our family's yomtov!!!! It's our Shimmie's yomtov!!! Five years ago I was bleeding from our 7th (and final) pregnancy loss and dh went to Meron to promise the name, and whadayaknow, less than 18 months later we kept our promise. Despite being up half the night with my kids last night, I'm overcome by the significance of this Personal Yom Tov for us. happy lag b'omer and yeshuos to all!!!

sister

Tue, May 12 2009, 8:48 am

mb your story brings tears to my eyes

ss321

Tue, May 12 2009, 8:56 am

Mama Bear wrote:

beautiful post Smile

you gave me the chills MB.

my DH used to go, but last year, he couldnt because of me embarrassed

it couldnt work with my schedule that month with school, and this year, he wasnt able to take off from work and was a pretty disappointed!! he was in yeshiva in E"Y so it is a big deal for him. His father would go also. so for him the visitingkivrei tzadikim and e/t was more a family type thing (he and his father would rent a car and go all over) than a "fun trip with friends that happens to have a spiritual component" type thing.

to the women complaining about the husbands being gone and taking off for a week and this and that - I want to offer a bit of a different perspective-
there have been times where I have gone places on MY own (I went to a conference with one baby left him with older DS, for example, a cousins wedding overseas that he couldnt miss college finals for and I was done so I went, bar mitzvah in chicago and I left him with BOTH kids for the night, he couldnt take off work, etc), and B"H he has managed amazingly! I have a wonderful husband who can deal with our kids patiently and effectively on his own. So if and when he wants to take ONE "SOLO" non-business trip a year, AND I can swing it (last year, I literally couldnt handle him leaving, my days were going to be erratic that specific month, and there was no way to change it,not to mention I was pg and it was a tough trimester for me), WHY NOT??? My parents AND in laws live close by. So (when he did go, which was a few yrs ago), I was not making shabbos with my son by ourselves, we went to my parents! And it was nice for ME to spend some 100% quality DS-Mommy time with my son! It was a great week for us! Of course it is easier to manage with two parents, but for one week, most moms (or dads) with a little bit of help from - a babysitter, a housekeeper, a sister/SIL, a mom - or all of the above, CAN handle it with one parent gone!
so what is all the fuss about????

windowsill

Tue, May 12 2009, 9:22 am

sister wrote:

mb your story brings tears to my eyes

Ditto..

Still at work, will come back here later

HAPPYMOMMY

Tue, May 12 2009, 12:35 pm

Gee, it looks like this thread spiraled elswhere overnight.

Last night was actually the hardest night. I couldn't fall asleep for a looong time since there was music blasting from the shul around the corner. Then I was up every hr for bathroom trips. And ds crawled into my bed at 3:30 am. Ds2 woke 5:00 am with terrible diarrea since he's been cutting teeth all of last week. B"H. Smile

Anyways, in answer to cindys post, my dh didn't just up and leave me alone. I had a choice to go (yes choc moose, myob, some people can afford vacations) but declined. I did not feel like sitting on a plane for 12 hours just to spend a couple days and have to travel 12 hrs again... I actually encouraged dh to go. He works really really hard and deserves it. I'm really happy he had time for himself to enjoy.

ChossidMom

Tue, May 12 2009, 2:56 pm

Mama Bear wrote:

But today I'm very emotional. It's our family's yomtov!!!! It's our Shimmie's yomtov!!! Five years ago I was bleeding from our 7th (and final) pregnancy loss and dh went to Meron to promise the name, and whadayaknow, less than 18 months later we kept our promise. Despite being up half the night with my kids last night, I'm overcome by the significance of this Personal Yom Tov for us. happy lag b'omer and yeshuos to all!!!

Amein! What an inspiring and moving story!!!
Thank you for sharing that.

windowsill

Wed, May 13 2009, 5:10 am

Good Morning everyone! Night no. 3 was GREAT B"H! I fell into bed exhausted @ 10pm and slept until 6am! (with a feed in the middle) I feel so refreshed and awake!!
I had to yank kids out of bed at 8 - they were so tired after their outing yesterday..

HAPPYMOMMY

Wed, May 13 2009, 9:56 am

Yay! Dh is back home safe and sound (well, actually on his way to work already!). Hope the week passes quickly and uneventfully for the rest of you.

Mama Bear

Wed, May 13 2009, 10:20 am

Yesterday was a bit challenging. Mendy turned blue and fainted from crying so hard when I left the room for a minute. what a fright! Took him the pedi, pedi told me it's a thing some kids do and not be scared. Bougth SM sneakers, went to my parents where my father gave Sm a haircut. we had supper, bathed the kids and put them in pj's then came home and put them to bed, then I went to Purple Rox's wedding. BH Sm slept thru the night but Mendy woke a lot, he was up from 5-6 am saying TATA! TATA! lol, I called dh up at 5 a.m. since I was up anyway. At 7:15 he woke me up by calling that theyre going up a high mountain and he wont be accessible by cell for 1 1/2 hours. I/m very worried cuz it's 3 horus later and he's still not answering. I hope they're all okay there.

ra_mom

Wed, May 13 2009, 11:00 am

Mama Bear wrote:

May Hashem protect your husband, and keep him safe, along with the rest of our husbands!
Amen!

windowsill

Wed, May 13 2009, 11:08 am

Back from work, and ready to tackle the most challenging - my kids!