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amother

Sun, Mar 31 2024, 7:24 am

amother cornflower wrote:

There are some issues that can be not solveable....I would never encourage anyone to move to my community!

Agreed. The Rabbi has been working with some people for the past 7 years to solve some of the issues, with very little progress.

amother

Sun, Mar 31 2024, 7:32 am

amother Ultramarine wrote:

what's holding you back from researching other states that will allow reciprocity for your husband's licensure?

do you have kids?

Very few states recognize this particular licensing. It's not a matter of reciprocity. In addition, my husband has a lot of concerns that by moving to a larger place, we are just exchanging one set of problems for another. (He is anxious about making a big move, so isn't ready to jump in until we really have to.)

Yes, I have kids, BH.
All my kids go to the local school through 8th grade. My boys go to two different out of town yeshivas for h.s.
My oldest daughter is in middle school. She will hopefully go to a decent size (about 50 girls per grade) OOT BY where she can live with my brother and SIL ( if we are still here).

amother

Watermelon

Sun, Mar 31 2024, 7:46 am

amother Valerian wrote:

Is this Norfolk Virginia?

Definitely not Norfolk. Norfolk has over 100 frum families and is growing every year.

amother

Sun, Mar 31 2024, 8:06 am

Nope. Not Norfolk, though I didn't know it was so big!!
I don't think I would answer on a public forum what city I live in...want to protect the innocent...and the guilty Wink

amother

Cerise

Sun, Mar 31 2024, 8:38 am

Is there a bigger community near by that your husband can commute?

How much is housing? Tuition?

Some communities advertise giving free tuition the first 2 yrs.

amother

Brickred

Sun, Mar 31 2024, 8:43 am

Is the area in general declining (high COL, not enough housing, crime, not sure what else ..) or just the frum community?

amother

Sun, Mar 31 2024, 8:58 am

amother Cerise wrote:

Is there a bigger community near by that your husband can commute?

How much is housing? Tuition?

Some communities advertise giving free tuition the first 2 yrs.

Housing is expensive. Not expensive compared to NY and Lakewood, but expensive compared to bigger OOT cities. A 4 bedroom house that is in good (but not upscale) condition goes in the mid $700s. I bought my house 13 years ago for a lot less....

Yes there are other small communities within 2 hours. However, if we are going to uproot everyone, we are not going to somewhere thats only a drop bigger, also with limited infrastructure.
If we move, we will go someplace with a large, solid infrastructure, but still an OOT feel. Maybe to a place where our siblings live.
Places like Miami, Cleveland, Detroit, etc... are on our radar.. ( not looking for anyone to weigh in on those places at this time, those are just ideas)

But we are not quite ready to give up on our idealism! We like living here. We like the small town feel. It's a nice, small city with little traffic, my kids know all the different dogs in the neighborhood. The bowling alley people know my boys, etc...
We are not kiruv professionals, by any stretch of the imagination, but we are able to provide support for new baalei tshuva, etc. Or there is a young man in our city who is going through a very sad divorce, and he doesn't really have a lot of family nearby. So we are able to invite him for meals, etc... or there are a few middle aged people who are married to non jews, and they like to come for us. They think its interesting that we are frum Jews who have secular degrees, and jobs in the "outside world".

Honestly, if any community is advertising free tuition, it probably has a lot of similar problems that my current community has! No interest.

P.S. I started this thread as an AMA. I'm not really looking for advice on what to do in my particular situation.(I mean, you are welcome to give it, but it's probably an idea that we are already considering...)

gibberish

Sun, Mar 31 2024, 8:58 am

I know the Seattle community is dying.
Are you concerned that the school will close due to declining enrollment?

amother

Sun, Mar 31 2024, 9:01 am

amother Brickred wrote:

Is the area in general declining (high COL, not enough housing, crime, not sure what else ..) or just the frum community?

Nope,not at all. It's considered a very nice city. Low crime, easy access to bigger cities on highway or train, very pretty. Nice quality of life. Good access to healthcare, very walkable, etc....

amother

Sun, Mar 31 2024, 9:04 am

gibberish wrote:

I know the Seattle community is dying.
Are you concerned that the school will close due to declining enrollment?

At this point, no. Could be an issue in the near future, but not the immediate future. I think the local Federation would not let the school school close at this time. They would step in and save it, financially.

If that happens, then it will certainly make our decision much easier!

amother

Pear

Sun, Mar 31 2024, 12:38 pm

How can you keep a school going with 30 families? Is most of the parent body Conservative or do you have classes with multiple ages?

amother

Navy

Sun, Mar 31 2024, 2:21 pm

You said you are staying partly to serve the non Jews in the area - how does the Jewish community serve them?

Also, would you say what state you are in if it won't give it away?

amother

Mon, Apr 01 2024, 8:53 am

amother Pear wrote:

How can you keep a school going with 30 families? Is most of the parent body Conservative or do you have classes with multiple ages?

that's a really good question. I honestly don't know how they keep the school going (I'm not involved in the school at all). I believe that they rely heavily on fundraising from outside of the frum community. Unfortunately, it's not such a good school, and the lack of $$ really shows in the level of education.....

There are some classes with multiple ages, but mostly in middle school. Not elementary (at this time). That might change over the next few years, though.

Also, there are about 30 families in the community, but there are (probably) a handful more families in the school. There are one or two Chabad families in neighboring cities that send to our school. There are also some campus kiruv families in a handful of nearby colleges that send to our school. (out of the roughly 30 families in our community, there are also some who no longer have kids in school).

There is a very successful chabad shul about 20 minutes away. They Rabbi/Rebbetzin have been very successful in encouraging their congregants to send to a Jewish school (even though these families aren't necessarily shomer shabbos). There are about 4 of those families in our school. Other than that, all the families are frum.

amother

Mon, Apr 01 2024, 8:55 am

amother Navy wrote:

You said you are staying partly to serve the non Jews in the area - how does the Jewish community serve them?

Also, would you say what state you are in if it won't give it away?

I'm sorry.... my mistake. I meant that we serve the non-frum Yidden in the area, not the non-Jews.

amother

Poppy

Mon, Apr 01 2024, 9:06 am

This thread is so interesting. I lived for years in Omaha, NE. We had maaaaaaaybe a minyan if there was a YT on a weekday. The kohanim who lived there when I was there were not frum, aside from the chabad shaliach who is a kohen but he was obviously at his own chabad house and not at the orthodox shul, so birkas kohanim was not by a frum kohen. The frum community there is tiny, it ebbs in and out over the years so at some points there can be a nice handful of frum families (never ever more than 10 truly frum families in the last 20 years at any one time).

You won't find a shul or community with more heart and soul than Omaha. But the school ends after middle school, so that's the time when the frum families leave. The orthodox shul is the main point of Jewish life in town and it has a packed schedule of events for every age and stage.

I look back on my years in Omaha with so much love, and while it's on life support, I don't see it getting to the 30 frum family mark OP has.

amother

Chocolate

Mon, Apr 01 2024, 9:52 am

amother Poppy wrote:

Wow, sounds fascinating. How long ago did you leave, and where did you go? Was it because of the school issue, or to be closer to your kids, or for work or some other reason?

Iymnok

Mon, Apr 01 2024, 11:09 am

gibberish wrote:

I know the Seattle community is dying.
Are you concerned that the school will close due to declining enrollment?

I'm from there. There are reasons that there are 3 schools.
Even some of the old families have left. Generally to Israel.
It's very hard to repair a small community.

amother

Chocolate

Mon, Apr 01 2024, 11:21 am

Iymnok wrote:

I'm from there. There are reasons that there are 3 schools.
Even some of the old families have left. Generally to Israel.
It's very hard to repair a small community.

I'm confused, I thought from OP's reply that she indicated that she's from Seattle. Did I misunderstand, or are there 3 schools for 30 families? If I did misunderstand, about how many frum families are still left in Seattle? We visited many years ago and have fond memories of a Shabbos walk around a lake with views of Mount Rainier in the distance.

amother

Brickred

Mon, Apr 01 2024, 12:44 pm

amother Chocolate wrote:

I don’t think OP ever said she’s from Seattle, it was someone else on the thread writing about their experience in Seattle.

gibberish

Mon, Apr 01 2024, 7:17 pm

How do you and your kids feel when so many friends are leaving each year? Do your kids still have friends to hang out with?

Have any shuls closed? Does the community still have enough demand to offer all the amenities that were there when you moved in?

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