Beware what babysitter you send to!

Cheiny

Fri, Mar 15 2024, 1:25 pm

amother Skyblue wrote:

Because most moms don't try to send their babies to a safe babysitter Banging head

“Try” being the key word. Of course every mother loves her child and would love to place him/her in the best and safest place possible, but we all know not every one of those day cares are okay and yet mothers use them anyway, for whatever reason, ie affordability, availability, etc.

That doesn’t mean it’s good or safe for the child. That’s been established.

amother

Skyblue

Fri, Mar 15 2024, 1:26 pm

Cheiny wrote:

Or maybe those who choose not to believe it, are doing so because they don’t want the guilt of knowing or facing that maybe their own choices for their own young children are far from optimal or safe.

So we should believe the cleaning ladys friend said that in some unknown location by some unknown babysitter kids are being mistreated...very helpful info. Maybe say where? If this babysitter hides it so well some identifying info may be helpful. If op was so concerned she would share more info.

amother

Chicory

Fri, Mar 15 2024, 1:32 pm

amother Skyblue wrote:

Precisely. It might be in Europe or in Australia. And it's only one babysitter. And it might not even be true. But it's very important to post here about it 'to spread awareness'.

Or not. More likely to spread guilty feelings.

Cheiny

Fri, Mar 15 2024, 1:33 pm

amother Skyblue wrote:

First, stop shooting the messenger. Getting angry at OP means you’re already deciding not believe it. That’s your choice. “IF OP was so concerned…” Not very nice to accuse her of not caring. If she didn’t, she wouldn’t have written the OP.

Second, claiming you won’t believe the cleaning lady is another sign you’ve decided not to believe it. Again, your choice and your right.

But don’t pretend the reason to totally discount the truth of it is because she hasn’t named the exact place.

Do you honestly think every day care place is good, safe, trustworthy?

Cheiny

Fri, Mar 15 2024, 1:36 pm

amother Chicory wrote:

And your last sentence sums it up for those attacking OP. The thought of it possibly being true (and I find it astonishing that anyone could think it’s definitely not happening out there when we’ve all heard firsthand stories about it indeed happening) would cause guilt, so let’s shlug it up, deny it, accuse OP or who she heard it from, of lying…

Okay, for those who want to bury their heads in the sand and pretend it doesn’t happen, you can do so. But don’t disrespect others who are concerned and who don’t want to take chances with their children’s safety or wellbeing.

amother

Skyblue

Fri, Mar 15 2024, 1:40 pm

Cheiny wrote:

What are mom's supposed to do with this information if they don't know the location? We all know there are bad babysitters. We all do our due diligence. Op is claiming to have info nobody knows but won't share where. So let's all pull our kids out of their babysitters and collect charity instead of working.

amother

Chicory

Fri, Mar 15 2024, 1:45 pm

Cheiny wrote:

Interesting how my last sentence 'proves' that I'm burying my head in the sand. I don't send to babysitters, my youngest child is 10!!!

So there goes your theory. Have a lovely Shabbos.

Cheiny

Fri, Mar 15 2024, 1:49 pm

amother Skyblue wrote:

The name of one place doesn’t matter. If she gives you the name, does that guarantee that yours is not bad as well? You think the only possibility is that it’s true about this one place she’s referring to or not?

Yes, every mother should do major research and continual checking up and popping in on any place she places her children in.

Cheiny

Fri, Mar 15 2024, 1:50 pm

amother Chicory wrote:

Interesting how my last sentence 'proves' that I'm burying my head in the sand. I don't send to babysitters, my youngest child is 10!!!

So there goes your theory. Have a lovely Shabbos.

Did I say you send out? Read what I wrote again. I specifically spoke in general terms. But yes, for some reason you choose to not want to believe it.

amother

Skyblue

Fri, Mar 15 2024, 1:52 pm

Cheiny wrote:

Ok great. So op provided no new information. This is yet another thread warning about the dangers of babysitters.

But if op was really that concerned she would at least say the location so she can give the moms that live there an extra warning.

amother

Acacia

Fri, Mar 15 2024, 1:56 pm

Children children, play nicely. Goodness people get nasty when they can go anonymous.

Even if the story isn’t true, it’s good to bring awareness. Most moms do try to send their babies to safe places but I do know of a few babysitters that many people send to and do not realize that their child is not getting taken care of.

I made that mistake when I sent my 6 month out. I went to check out the place before but she knew I was coming and had things calm then. Once I started sending, I saw how filthy she kept the place, she never knew if my baby ate her bottle or had a dirty diaper, I’d walk in to her crying in the bumbo being ignored because there were too many kids to attend to. There is another babysitter I live next door to and I know the babysitters family who is very disfunctional. They yell/scream all the time and I’ve heard from her tenants that she hears babies screaming all day long. And both of these babysitters are in business still

amother

Skyblue

Fri, Mar 15 2024, 2:01 pm

amother Acacia wrote:

Did you warn parents who sent their kids to these places or let them know?

amother

Obsidian

Fri, Mar 15 2024, 2:35 pm

amother Acacia wrote:

That’s terrible! Oy it really makes me wanna cry! I have a newborn and I’m just imagining a bunch of babies not getting any TLC and crying and it breaks my heart! I wish I could help them all

amother

Apricot

Fri, Mar 15 2024, 3:40 pm

Op please ask your cleaning lady what's the name of her friend that works in this daycare. No lashon hara involved if you publish that information:
"My cleaning lady Maria sanchez said her friend Victoria alvarez who works in a daycare in brooklyn that..."
At least mothers who have a baby in a group in Brooklyn with a caretaker named Victoria can look into it a little more!!!
Might be more helpful than sharing such a vague message.

amother

Oldlace

Fri, Mar 15 2024, 4:32 pm

amother OP wrote:

The point of the post is what you see in the title.

Awareness, importance of verification, and so on.

If the story is untrue and my cleaning lady dreamed it at night, great. The point remains a point.

This is not to discredit all babysitters at all. Nothing like that was mentioned on this post.

If you don't believe it, don't. Nobody is asking or forcing you to.

The importance of verifying the safety and advocating for your children remains.

All I can think of reading this is "Your cleaning lady speaks English??". In my neck of the woods, they could never explain a story I would understand 😆.