Would it bother you at all?

amother

Pewter

Wed, Feb 07 2024, 1:37 pm

amother OP wrote:

Why?

I would worry about causing your in-laws pain,

I would do a double name if you would use both like Chana Leah, Chana Rivka, Chana Rochel

amother

Cinnamon

Wed, Feb 07 2024, 1:37 pm

hodeez wrote:

So many other names out there why davka use a name that's already in the family?

Because she really really likes the name.
I get it.
I’m a bit picky with names.

Busybee5

Wed, Feb 07 2024, 1:37 pm

amother Cinnamon wrote:

Why?????

It's like you're saying I love your name but I'm going to give the Jewish version. I don't know it rubs me up the wrong way for some reason.
Op, do what you want. I personally wouldn't but that's just me. If you really can't forgo the name, then give it gezunterheit.

amother

Cinnamon

Wed, Feb 07 2024, 1:38 pm

amother Pewter wrote:

I would worry about causing your in-laws pain,

I would do a double name if you would use both like Chana Leah, Chana Rivka, Chana Rochel

So ask them first. I wouldn’t assume it would.

amother

Cinnamon

Wed, Feb 07 2024, 1:39 pm

Busybee5 wrote:

So you’d be worried she may take it as a compliment?

amother

Wed, Feb 07 2024, 1:39 pm

hodeez wrote:

So many other names out there why davka use a name that's already in the family?

She just joined the family
We always had this name in mind for a long awaited baby
I think I can still name it...but it's niggling in my brain that maybe I shouldn't...I should run it by our rav

amother

Wed, Feb 07 2024, 1:41 pm

Busybee5 wrote:

I hear that

We are both picky with names we love so it'll be tough coming up with a new name. It has so much meaning to us....maybe we should use it as a second name

amother

Snowdrop

Wed, Feb 07 2024, 1:43 pm

amother OP wrote:

I'm going to be extremely disappointed to not name a name we both love and always had in mind because of this non frum sibling...

You're asking people what they personally would do so that's what they're responding. If you will be extremely disappointed then of course you can give the name! I don't see anything objectively wrong with it. It doesn't even look like most replies were against it.

amother

Snowdrop

Wed, Feb 07 2024, 1:48 pm

amother OP wrote:

I hear that

We are both picky with names we love so it'll be tough coming up with a new name. It has so much meaning to us....maybe we should use it as a second name

I'd say give the name as the first name if you love it so much. The Hebrew version is not even the sil's name, only the English version is. I don't see any problem.

zaq

Wed, Feb 07 2024, 1:49 pm

A slap in the face to the sibs? Nonsense! They would see it as a huge compliment. Christians consider it a great honor to have a child named after them in their own lifetime. Do you mind if Hannah gets the impression that you wish to honor her?

At the end of the day, it's your baby, your decision. Parents should love the names they give their children. It's nobody else's business. Not their parents', not their siblings', not their next-door neighbors'. Nobody's.

#BestBubby

Wed, Feb 07 2024, 1:50 pm

amother Pewter wrote:

I would worry about causing your in-laws pain,

My thoughts as well.

A couple asked godol a godol if they should name their baby, Yonosson.

The mother didn't want, because a neighbor child named Yonosson died in an accident, so bad luck.

The husband thought that was nonsense.

The godol said not to give the name Yonossan because everytime the neighbor mother will hear that named called, it would cause her pain.

Busybee5

Wed, Feb 07 2024, 1:58 pm

#BestBubby wrote:

Yeah I'd run it by a Rav.

amother

Leaf

Wed, Feb 07 2024, 2:01 pm

hodeez wrote:

So many other names out there why davka use a name that's already in the family?

Off topic but I don't get this way of thinking at all, maybe because we name our kids after the Chabad Rebbes and Rebbetzins so I never really had to pick a name, but do you really never use a name that has already been used by someone else in the family? If so, what choices are you left with? I can't imagine coming up with some exotic names just because I want to be original.
And do you never use biblical names assuming that as Jews some member of your family already used most names?

Ema of 5

Wed, Feb 07 2024, 2:02 pm

amother OP wrote:

I'm going to be extremely disappointed to not name a name we both love and always had in mind because of this non frum sibling...

If that’s what YOU want to name your baby, then go for it. Why should it matter what OTHER people would or wouldn’t do? Does it bother YOU or your husband? Do either of you have negative feelings about using the name? If not, then go for it. Don’t let the women here convince you out of using a name you love.

#BestBubby

Wed, Feb 07 2024, 4:19 pm

Ema of 5 wrote:

Today's generation .

Why care if you cause other pain?

A Godol said don't give a name if it will cause your neighbor pain.

amother

Leaf

Wed, Feb 07 2024, 4:23 pm

#BestBubby wrote:

Today's generation .

Why care if you cause other pain?

A Godol said don't give a name if it will cause your neighbor pain.

This has nothing to do with today's generation and OP has yet to ask a gadol. Your really projecting here, don't you think? I'm glad you found another reason to bash today's generation 😆

amother

Yellow

Wed, Feb 07 2024, 5:07 pm

My daughters name (who was in the family before MY SIL) is the same name as my SIL whose uses the english version. I don't get the big deal at all.

Also my daughters middle name(we dont call her that) is the same as my step moms middle name. I asked my step mom permission and a Rav before I named her that but if thats the name made sense to use and there wasn't an issue I wanted to use it

funkyfrummom

Wed, Feb 07 2024, 5:50 pm

Because names are so important, it actually would bother me, but that's just me-- I would worry about what was going on spiritually, beyond our ability to perceive/recognize. I would speak to a rav who can provide guidance for what is done in your circles and if he says not problem, then there shouldn't be a problem.

My more practical concerns would be appearing to give kavod to the BIL/SIL, who are clearly going against Torah values, and thereby unintentionally offending your in-laws.

The suggestion of doing a double name seems like a reasonable one that might would be an option, because it changing the character of the name.

Although some people don't even connect Hannah with Chana...YOU did-- so it's not like it was off your radar.

amother

Wed, Feb 07 2024, 7:02 pm

#BestBubby wrote:

Today's generation .

Why care if you cause other pain?

A Godol said don't give a name if it will cause your neighbor pain.

I think the story you mentioned it different
I even heard of a child not being in a certain morahs class because she had lost a child with that name (and it was recent)

I don't think my inlaws would think of it as the same name. Besides we would call by a nickname....if we would give the name