Monsey schools | Imamother

amother

Peach

Mon, May 01 2023, 11:03 pm

amother Azure wrote:

Several unaffiliated schools have opened in Monsey throughout the years and had to close down because people didn't want to send there, because it's unaffiliated and they accept everyone.......
People don't want to send to schools that accept, yet are mad that the schools that are bursting at the seems, don't accept. Then blame the Rabbanim for not doing anything about the situation.

Which schools have opened and closed down?

amother

Oxfordblue

Mon, May 01 2023, 11:09 pm

amother Birch wrote:

They are full to capacity. The last few slots usually go to the the one with the highest donation.
Most schools are full and not interested in opening another class per grade. Bsm and Bais Bracha are very selective and would rather have smaller classes than take a type not exactly like they want.

Beautiful yiddishe attitude. I wonder what Torah concept that connects to. Children and parents are sitting home in tears, and the schools hold back the slots cause they're not an exact match to the type they want.

What's the point of all the Torah learning if we don't incorporate the lessens it provides?

amother

Cyclamen

Tue, May 02 2023, 12:29 am

amother Oxfordblue wrote:

first of all, the drama on this thread, my goodness. cut the theatrics.

2nd of all, as a private entity a school has every right to accept whoever they want. they're not responsible for all of klal yisroel.
the schools will accept and reject ppl because they need to curate their "type" (especially newer schools) so that they'll have parents that will wanna send to their school, because guess what, most parents, like OP's sibling, wanna send their kid to a school with a parent body that shares their values and is a certain type. wow.*sound of mind being blown*

its a chicken and an egg. a school needs a good name to attract a good parent body because a good parent body will only send to their school if they have a good parent body, and if they wanna have a school they need a parent body. you can yell at the schools for not accepting everyone, but deep in your heart you probably don't want them to accept everyone.

and if you're angry enough about this, no ones holding you back from opening your own school where you can accept whoever you want.

I don't mean to be insensitive to the ppl that don't have schools for their kids, I really feel bad, but the arguments and drama on this thread are just ridiculous.

amother

Apricot

Tue, May 02 2023, 1:28 am

amother Cyclamen wrote:

At this point, a school is here for the Klal.
When the entire community is centered around which schools you send to, and it's a given that every child needs a school, you cannot just shrug your shoulders and play the private entity card, especially when there are mothers, fathers, children, broken apart by this. If a child in Monsey is home then yes, every Rav, every school and every Monsey parent is responsible to do their part. Areivim Kol Yisroe Zeh lozeh.
We are responsible as a community, as a collective entity.
I'm not even talking about Brooklyn people moving out knowing the situation. But I'm talking about Monsey people who live here for a while who can't get into a school.
No you don't have to accept a family that goes counter to your value system, but find a place for them. Like they do in Lakewood. There's a vaad and every child must be placed before school begins. I bet you if schools wouldn't open in September because there are still children not placed, then every parent would frantically be getting involved.

amother

Oxfordblue

Tue, May 02 2023, 8:15 am

amother Apricot wrote:

Thank you. Schools cannot be considered private entities with no responsibilities to the klal, when public school style options are not available to the community. The klal and community are responsible for their being a seat available to every child in the community. Once established, then we can have additional schools setting themselves aside for their preferences.

Schools are not an afternoon club, it's not an extracurricular program. Schools are a necessity for every child and a critical component if chinuch. For a school to set themselves aside and act in an egotistical, elitist manner and kick people aside, when they do have seats available in a time of crisis, is antithetical to yiddishkeit and our Torah.

amother

Oxfordblue

Tue, May 02 2023, 8:24 am

amother Cyclamen wrote:

It isn't insensitivity that you need to be concerned about it. It's ga'aveh, egotism, elitism that comes to mind. Or more concerning such a thought process does not fit with our Torah. Great Rabbonim have concurred with this sentiment.

If parents are the ones who can only parent in strict black boxes, then maybe a re-education for parents is a good place to start. Are the versions of yiddishkeit from these parents so weak and so unsubstantiated, that it can only hold up if isolated in cookie cutter environment?. Is the foundation of our Torah so weak, that if a child sees someone slightly different than himself, he is going to run for the hills? Is this the yiddishkeit that we are teaching our kids. Sad.

Maybe ask yourself if you are the one contributing to the pain and suffering of your fellow brothers and sisters with such an attitude. Insisting to interact with only a certain type, and knowingly hurting others in the process, is not part of our Torah. In actuality, our Torah teaches us the reverse. What good is such an elitist attitude, what good is your chinuch if doesn't align with the Torah. We are supposed to learn Torah to put it into action. We aren't supposed to use the Torah to raise ourselves up while stepping on others.

amother

Hyssop

Tue, May 02 2023, 10:46 am

amother Tan wrote:

Oxfordblue, did you read all replies on the thread about people not wanting to send to schools that accept everyone?
Newsflash. There are those schools. They do exist. People don’t want to send there. So instead of bashing schools that are choosy you can bash people who are choosy. The argument makes no sense if it’s one sided.

This. If you feel you don’t want to send to a school (I.e. bdy) because they accept everyone and you’re complaining it basically means you want there should be a school that only accepts a certain crowd and you should be the exception (being that they obviously don’t think you fit the criteria).

Having said that, I do sympathize with the people that aren’t part of a chassidus that has a school and are very chassidish and have nowhere to send…

amother

Oxfordblue

Tue, May 02 2023, 10:53 am

amother Tan wrote:

Yes, have you read the other replies that despite all the new schools in place there still aren't enough seats to accept all students?

And yet we have seats in some schools being held because people aren't their exact type.
Middos Sidom.

I know that this is the MO of our community. Those for whom the system works for will find ways to blame the victims. This way they can whitewash their own hands and rationalize their behaviors to themselves. I mean it make sense. No one really wants to call out their own part in wrongdoings.

amother

Tan

Tue, May 02 2023, 10:57 am

amother Oxfordblue wrote:

No, don’t change the subject. There are enough seats in the schools that people consider second or third choice. But people are fighting to get into the top choice and would rather keep the kids home than send to the second choice.
If someone is not accepted in BDY then there must be good reason for it and they must rethink if they belong in chassidish schools at all.

amother

Oxfordblue

Tue, May 02 2023, 11:04 am

amother Tan wrote:

Keep going. Victim blaming at its finest.

Can you say with confidence that there are enough seats in schools - when the askonim disagree with you?

Secondly, there can often be other issues at play that people are not privy too. It isnt always about people's lifestyles.

If this were simply be about people not liking their options, we wouldn't be where we are today with large numbers sitting home. There are plenty of kids sitting home because they have zero options. It also wouldn't be considered such a crisis where we are at the point where communities are begging people to stay away.

amother

Oleander

Tue, May 02 2023, 11:05 am

There’s only one school in monsey that accepts almost everyone. That’s BDY. And I don’t want this to become a thread about bashing BDY.

Sure, there are people who don’t want the school for valid reasons. There are people who don’t want it because it’s beneath them.

But then there are also people who recognize the name it has, and the very real consequences that come along with this. I know several people who sent to BDY for lack of other options, and then their daughter needed a different high school, seminary, or just a different school altogether because the school isn’t working out for their child…. And then they were absolutely unwanted anywhere because their child was in BDY. I’m NOT saying this applies to everyone, and that exceptions don’t happen. But this I know firsthand from several good, upstanding people. The other schools didn’t shy away from saying that to their faces “oh we don’t accept BDY families”. Sure, it’s 100% wrong. And still a very real issue I need to keep in mind before sending there. As difficult as it is to get into a school, it’s all the more difficult to switch from that school (unless you switch to a brand new school in their first or so year).
So let’s not assume that parents have options and they’re just being picky.
We’re trying to play in a losing game.