How do I deal w tenant above using washer/dryer at 1:30 am?

heidi

Mon, Mar 20 2023, 4:41 am

amother OP wrote:

Tenant bought her own machine and like I said earlier, all washer dryers Ive had or tenants have had, over many years, made similar amount of noise, its the hour thats the change now, and the problem.

I see it as normal living, not making unreasonable noise or parties in the middle of the night.
I do my laundry when I want. I think it's terribly intrusive of you to try to limit her laundry hours, in her own home. Whether she rents or owns.

amother

Daisy

Mon, Mar 20 2023, 5:09 am

Op I often do laundry any hour of the night if I happen to be up...
My landlords never said it disturbed and my machine vibrates strongly and knocks around
I called down the company but they didn't do anything to help it knock less
If it disturbed I would want to be told, it would make my life a lot harder though 😔

gold2

Mon, Mar 20 2023, 5:21 am

In some countries there are laws about how much noise you can make after 10pm if you live in an apartment building. So it's not a free for all.

But either way if it's really disturbing you I would let them know.

imaima

Mon, Mar 20 2023, 6:27 am

heidi wrote:

She can make her aware and the tenant can make a choice to preserve the good relationship on her side (it cannot be all on OP!) and forego the late night laundry.
What a small price to pay for a mitzvah of respecting other person‘s sleep.

watergirl

Mon, Mar 20 2023, 6:39 am

amother OP wrote:

I think any noise-making over a bedroom, between midnight and 8 am isnt right. That leaves 8 am to midnight. Thats a lot of hours.

Does the tenant even know that her laundry room is over your bedroom?

You are expecting a lot of mind reading here.

flowerpower

Mon, Mar 20 2023, 9:33 am

heidi wrote:

My sisters landlord sleeps beneath her washing machine. My sister is careful when to wash laundry. And yes, she works full time. It’s not an aveira to be a mentch

keym

Mon, Mar 20 2023, 9:44 am

The basic question is when you're living in multi-dwelling living, where's the line between regular living and being a courteous neighbor.

I had a neighbor once who would yell at me that my flushing the toilet and taking a shower (we had old, creaky noisy pipes) would wake her baby. She wanted us not to shower or flush between 11pm and 7am.
She said that in her house, they didn't shower or flush because her kids are light sleepers and therefore it was a perfectly acceptable thing to ask.

My point is that there's lots of space between "blasting music dancing and 50 people at midnight" and "no flushing the toilet"
And each person has their own perspective.

amother

Sage

Mon, Mar 20 2023, 9:55 am

keym wrote:

I was just going to say this.
In a multi family home or apartment building, flushing the toilet or taking a shower can sound really loud to the neighbors. That's just part of apartment living and no one should have to refrain from flushing or showing in their home whenever needed.

amother

Olive

Mon, Mar 20 2023, 10:13 am

My downstairs neighbors always complained about noise. 9:30 fri night my kids were still awake when hers werent. (She moved in after me, we were both tenants) Finally, I couldnt take the pressure, and we moved. Her husband came to tell us that we were such nice neighbors and they are gonna miss my kids. Well, kids make noise. And also he said he got used to the noise. Sorry, too late. Now the place is empty and you can enjoy the peace and quiet.

observer

Mon, Mar 20 2023, 10:45 am

amother OP wrote:

OP here.
To summarize:

If in 40 years, no one in this 3 family house, including myself, has used their washer/dryer past midnight, other than 2-3 times a year (which I assume was for emergencies), was that a coincidence, or was it their good Midos?

Why are those the only two options??

I would guess that most people are not doing laundry at 2am because they are asleep then, or trying to get to sleep, not because they are longing to do laundry at that hour but are refraining due to good middos.

Your tenant obviously has a different schedule. And most likely has no idea that it makes enough noise to disturb you. Which is why you need to be open with her and tell her.

watergirl

Mon, Mar 20 2023, 10:52 am

For one year we lived above our landlord. They rented to us knowing we had little kids and a dog (we even paid a pet deposit). After we moved in, they told us they expect no walking AFTER 7:30!! And the landlord also told us after we moved in that we can not flush any toilet paper at all, she claimed the pipes could not handle it, and we should take the trash out daily to the trash cans, which they allotted us one for the week (we flushed TP anyway). After a year of gehennom, we left.

amother

Mintcream

Mon, Mar 20 2023, 11:27 am

amother OP wrote:

Thats negotiable but 2 am isnt.

Hi op,

You said the tenant is nice. Please no more snarky comments against her schedule until you make her aware how it is negatively impacting you. It just diminishes her in your mind. I'm pretty sure if she's a nice normal person you can come to a solution.

Night owls may be rare but we exist. In addition, I wake up early when I don't go to sleep late.. I regularly do washes at 2 am and at 530 am. I admit I am slightly embarrassed by your condescending attitude. Why do you have to make fun of us? I work 40 hours a week w a massive family and probably undiagnosed ADD as well. (Hence the late nights).

This is why I'm in a private home btw. I can't deal with this judgement.

I'm in a private home, but I do have a very large family. I'm all over my house cleaning up at night and the washer is a subtle noise and only in the adjacent rooms, you can only hear the draining downstairs.

I assure you she does not realize she's bothering you.

Please talk to her without judgement, but just clarifying your needs.

[Edit for spelling. I'm sure there are more]

amother

Peony

Mon, Mar 20 2023, 11:54 am

watergirl wrote:

I'd like to believe that landlords don't realize the gehennom they put their tenants through.
Another gehennom survivor here.

watergirl

Mon, Mar 20 2023, 11:58 am

amother Peony wrote:

I'd like to believe that landlords don't realize the gehennom they put their tenants through.
Another gehennom survivor here.

I think mine knew. He told me something along the lines of "And I am a dayan at the local beis din so if you have issues with me, you can't do anything about it"... after we signed the lease. I had a few (frum) local repair people (licensed and legal) come to fix things and they all offered to go to bat for us if we had to take them to civil court, as the piping and electricity was all illegal and very far away from being in code.

The landlord KNEW what he was doing.

amother

Trillium

Mon, Mar 20 2023, 12:01 pm

amother Mintcream wrote:

Hi op,

You said the tenant is nice. Please no more sparky comments against her schedule until you make her aware how it is negatively impacting you. It just diminishes her in your mind. I'm pretty sure if she's a nice normal person you can come to a solution.

Night owls may be rare but we exist. In addition, I wake up early when I don't go to sleep late.. I regularly do washes at 2 am and at 530 am. I admit I am slightly embarrassed by your condescending attitude. Why do you have to make fun of us? I work 40 hours a week w a massive family and probably undiagnosed ADD as well. (Hence the late nights).

This is why I'm in a private home btw. I can't deal with this judgement.

I'm in a private home, but I do have a very large family. I'm all over my house cleaning up at night and the washer is a subtle noise and only in the adjacent rooms, you can only hear the draining downstairs.

I assure you she does not realize she's bothering you.

Please talk to her without judgement, but just clarifying your needs.

So interesting - this is me exactly and I also suspect I have ADD. I still never connected my being a night owl with it.

(But I'm the poster above who wrote that her washer was going at 5.00 AM)

amother

Daisy

Mon, Mar 20 2023, 12:02 pm

amother Trillium wrote:

So interesting - this is me exactly and I also suspect I have ADD. I still never connected my being a night owl with it.

(But I'm the poster above who wrote that her washer was going at 5.00 AM)

I'm a night owl, how is it connected to ADD? Do you need quiet?

amother

Daisy

Mon, Mar 20 2023, 12:03 pm

watergirl wrote:

That is just Can't Believe It

amother

Trillium

Mon, Mar 20 2023, 12:05 pm

amother Daisy wrote:

I'm a night owl, how is it connected to ADD? Do you need quiet?

I'm not saying it's connected - the other poster said in her case she felt it was connected.
And I found it interesting that she said that because I've been suspecting that I have ADD for a long time (more because I find it hard to be organized and get down to things, but once I do get into something, I can hyper focus on it for a long time.) At the same time, I'm also a night owl and get much more done during night hours.

amother

Mintcream

Mon, Mar 20 2023, 12:13 pm

amother Daisy wrote:

I'm a night owl, how is it connected to ADD? Do you need quiet?

I posted above about the ADD. Ive never been diagnosed and don't know tons, but I 've heard erratic sleep patterns can go with this. Like I said, it's 2am or 5 am (and sometimes both).

Also the possibile ADD is probably I find it very difficult to remember to put in a load while lots of people are awake.

Note, due to my family size I need 2 loads a day and at least 3 on Sunday.