"I would never spend that much on an outfit" vent

So this year, I treated myself to the first new outfit I have ever bought for myself.

Sometimes my Rebbitzen will give me things that do not fit her right, yes they are new but they do not fit me right really all the time. Sometimes my mother will buy me little outfits, and it's the similar thing u know?

This year, I had saved enough money to get a bed for myself, myv ery own bed with my very own money. EXTREMELY exciting for me Smile

It just so happens that when I went to the store, the bed was ON SALE!!

Now typically when I have extra money, spend it on the kids no?? This time I decided...why do that, I saved this money for me. It was just enough to spoil myself just a little, so my friend dragged me to cheap stores (resale, salvation army). To her it was the best way to get more for the money. Nothing fit, and I really wanted to SPOIL myself so to speak.

So I went to my fav store, talbots, as a petite woman it's the only store where everything fits me, without adjustments. I found the most perfect outfit, that just fits me like a glove!! So u know what?? I got it.

This past shabbos, this woman comes up to me (now I know she's going through financial issues, heck so am I). So she says, that outfit is beautiful!! I said thanks, this was my treat for myself (u know proud I could treat myself for ONCE). She says, "I would never spend that much on an outfit but it looks great on u." I almost fell over and cried, because I NEVER treat myself and where did she have a right to say that to me!?

I said firstly, it's none of your business, secondly it's shabbos and walked away. It still really hurt. I kn ow she's saying to everyone, oh she has no money for rent but she can buy this outfit for herself Crying or Very sad

Platinum Member Joined: May 06 2007 Posts: 8521

Don't even worry about that woman. Unfortunately, being rude and making comments just make some people feel better about themselves - this was not about you at all - it's about her issues.

Enjoy your outfit - you deserve it and much more!
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Just Plain Frum!

Last edited by Tefila on Sun, Jul 08 2007, 7:40 pm; edited 1 time in total

Posted: Sun, Jul 08 2007, 9:41 am Post subject:

mitzvahmom - how does she know how much you spent ... talbots very often has things on sale ... and it is also none of her business ... what is important to some is unimportant ... treating yourself is one of the most important things - as a woman - especially as a single woman forget her ... and congratulations on your wonderful outfit ... wear it in good health and FUN!!!
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don't wonder why people go crazy ... rather wonder why we don't
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NUTso but cute ~ things balance out Nervous

Platinum Member Joined: Jan 01 2006 Posts: 48156

Two issues here.

First of all, MM and her new outfit. For that, wear it in good health and have a lot of simcha from it! Yagati Umatzati - you work hard for your $$$, and losing weight, and you succeeded in finding a good sale! It was bashert.

Secondly, is the lady and her situation. Let's just pity her...and hope when she needs something, she gets it too.

(Lastly - I only shop Talbot's with a big coupon or a huge sale, so I guess it's not so uncommon . . . . but it shouldn't take away from your simcha! I'm sure both she and I do spend money that you maybe wouldn't, so let's consider it even.)

Posted: Sun, Jul 08 2007, 9:46 am Post subject:

Active Poster Joined: Aug 14 2006 Posts: 99 Location: ny

Diamond Member Joined: Nov 27 2006 Posts: 4760

Oh please MM, why do you feel bad or guilty? You dont have to justify yourself to anyone!! Some people just dont 'fargin' others.

Wear it and tear it in good health!

When things like this happen, I thank Hashem for handing me a nisayon in the form of a rude remark that I know I don't deserve...it is so obvious you do not deserve it that it screams out what it is "NISAYON!" Food for the yetzer hara which wants to make you second guess giving yourself something you do deserve, which is a nice outfit.

Ignore it and be B'simcha...

I have some stories about how ignoring rude remarks brought me berachas...I wish I could always ignore such things..

wear it in good health!

Platinum Member Joined: Jan 01 2006 Posts: 48156

Platinum Member Joined: May 16 2005 Posts: 6262

shes prob just jealous.

You know the saying "misery loves company"...she's jealous that you were able to get yourself something nice, and she can't, plus now she feels like she doesn't have a buddy to comiserate (sp?) with.

Just because she wouldn't have bought the outfit doesn't mean that you shouldn't have. People spend their money in different ways and have different priorities. Sometimes when they think that they are spending less and being frugal, they actually are spending more.

Gold Member Joined: Jan 12 2006 Posts: 1724

Some people really have no brains....

You can't do anything about it.

Tischadesh! You really really deserved it!