Baby in Your Bed | Imamother

timeout

Wed, Mar 23 2005, 10:38 am

www.babystyle.com

See co-sleeper the original that's what I have.

deedee

Wed, Mar 23 2005, 12:20 pm

baby always sleeps b/t me and the wall. when she was a newborn I used a baby blanket on her and my comforter on me. it is alot easier and safer to sleep with ur baby when u have a big bed. she sleeps on one side and I sleep on the other. just like my body knows where the edge of the bed is so I dont fall off, I'm awear that my baby is next to me so I dont roll on her.

it depends on the individual mother. if you think its best to sleep with your baby you'll make sure she is safe-where ever she sleeps!

amother

Sun, Mar 27 2005, 5:53 pm

just out couriosity... for all of you who have your babies sleep with you in bed, how do you have time or place for your husbands (if you catch my drift)?

timeout

Sun, Mar 27 2005, 6:01 pm

We have seperate beds Very Happy

and I only kept my baby in till 4 months in a co-sleeper and sometimes with me

deedee

Sun, Mar 27 2005, 6:02 pm

there is always his bed.....

1stimer

Mon, Mar 28 2005, 4:42 am

Quote:

1stimer - if I would be used to sleeping without my baby, one night with him would probably be very distracting. It's the entire package that you get used to, and yes, you actually do get more sleep.

u misunderstand. my baby sleeps better in his cot. most nights he starts of in his cot and ends up in my bed sooner or later and NO I don't get more sleep. u might but I don't.

1stimer

Mon, Mar 28 2005, 4:47 am

Quote:

DOS:

Take precautions to prevent baby from rolling out of bed, even though it is unlikely when baby is sleeping next to mother. Like heat-seeking missiles, babies automatically gravitate toward a warm body. Yet, to be safe, place baby between mother and a guardrail or push the mattress flush against the wall and position baby between mother and the wall. Guardrails enclosed with plastic mesh are safer than those with slats, which can entrap baby's limbs or head. Be sure the guardrail is flush against the mattress so there is no crevice that baby could sink into.
Place baby adjacent to mother, rather than between mother and father. Mothers we have interviewed on the subject of sharing sleep feel they are so physically and mentally aware of their baby's presence even while sleeping, that it's extremely unlikely they would roll over onto their baby. Some fathers, on the other hand, may not enjoy the same sensitivity of baby's presence while asleep; so it is possible they might roll over on or throw out an arm onto baby. After a few months of sleep-sharing, most dads seem to develop a keen awareness of their baby's presence.
Place baby to sleep on his back.
Use a large bed, preferably a queen-size or king-size. A king-size bed may wind up being your most useful piece of "baby furniture." If you only have a cozy double bed, use the money that you would ordinarily spend on a fancy crib and other less necessary baby furniture and treat yourselves to a safe and comfortable king-size bed.
Some parents and babies sleep better if baby is still in touching and hearing distance, but not in the same bed. For them, a bedside co-sleeper is a safe option.
DON'TS:

Do not sleep with your baby if:
1. You are under the influence of any drug (such as alcohol or tranquilizing medications) that diminishes your sensitivity to your baby's presence. If you are drunk or drugged, these chemicals lessen your arousability from sleep.

2. You are extremely obese. Obesity itself may cause sleep apnea in the mother, in addition to the smothering danger of pendulous breasts and large fat rolls.

3. You are exhausted from sleep deprivation. This lessens your awareness of your baby and your arousability from sleep.

4. You are breastfeeding a baby on a cushiony surface, such as a waterbed or couch. An exhausted mother could fall asleep breastfeeding and roll over on the baby.

5. You are the child's baby-sitter. A baby-sitter's awareness and arousability is unlikely to be as acute as a mother's.

Don't allow older siblings to sleep with a baby under nine months. Sleeping children do not have the same awareness of tiny babies as do parents, and too small or too crowded a bed space is an unsafe sleeping arrangement for a tiny baby.
Don't fall asleep with baby on a couch. Baby may get wedged between the back of the couch and the larger person's body, or baby's head may become buried in cushion crevices or soft cushions.
Do not sleep with baby on a free-floating, wavy waterbed or similar "sinky" surface in which baby could suffocate.
Don't overheat or overbundle baby. Be particularly aware of overbundling if baby is sleeping with a parent. Other warm bodies are an added heat source.
Don't wear lingerie with string ties longer than eight inches. Ditto for dangling jewelry. Baby may get caught in these entrapments.
Avoid pungent hair sprays, deodorants, and perfumes. Not only will these camouflage the natural maternal smells that baby is used to and attracted to, but foreign odors may irritate and clog baby's tiny nasal passages. Reserve these enticements for sleeping alone with your spouse.
Use common sense when sharing sleep. Anything that could cause you to sleep more soundly than usual or that alters your sleep patterns can affect your baby's safety. Nearly all the highly suspected (but seldom proven) cases of fatal "overlying" I could find in the literature could have been avoided if parents had observed common sense sleeping practices.

www.askdrsears.com

Yosefa

Wed, Jun 15 2005, 2:02 pm

I think I'm all for co-sleeping if it works with your lifestyle. It's been working for me for 3.5 weeks, but I don't plan on keeping it up for very long. However, I have this family tree book and it is recorder that someone in my family several generations back rooled over her baby. I think it said she was a very big woman.

I think if you're comfortable with the situation, it's probably because it would work for you: You don't sleep too deeply, you're not too big, you don't have a lot of blankets or a very small bed... If it doesn't seem right to you, there could be a good reason and you should trust your instincts. If you wake up to find yourself in a scary position, you might want to reconsider. It upsets/scares my husband a lot, but I sleep better with my daughter.

I wasn't going to sleep with my baby, but she wouldn't sleep anywhere else after her sleepy newborn days. I try to transfer her to her co-sleeper, usually she wakes up within 10 mins. The swing works though. With me she will sleep "through the night" (five hours or so) then I get up to go to the b.r., brush my teeth...and she wakes up as soon as I leave. She will wake up sometimes, but falls right back to sleep if she's not hungry.

amother

Mon, May 03 2010, 1:01 pm

I read in a shiur about Schlomo ha melech that the two mothers fighting for the baby were co-sleeping and that's how the accident happened. It seems it was dangerous already at the time!

flowerpower

Mon, May 03 2010, 1:05 pm

Good morning. Your response is five years late!

Isramom8

Mon, May 03 2010, 1:09 pm

The women were MIL and DIL says one meforash, and yes, I'd say they wouldn't do well cosleeping Wink

amother

Mon, May 03 2010, 5:33 pm

honestly, though, your husbands are all ok with this? a previous amother asked this but there werent many answers. I'm really curious, though. my husband says me or the baby and would be really insulted if I chose the baby. (we sleep in the same bed whenever we can.)

shnitzel

Mon, May 03 2010, 5:38 pm

amother wrote:

all three of us sleep in the same bed when we can, me in the
middle and dh wouldn't have it any other way if dh didn't like it I wouldn't do it

MommyZ

Mon, May 03 2010, 5:43 pm

I have done it with three babies I do sometimes with my 15 mth old. I prefer not to usually since I like my space but sometimes it's the only way for me to get sleep. When ds wakes up in middle of the night dh will bring him to my bed. He has his own bed that he sleeps in.

Last edited by MommyZ on Mon, May 03 2010, 5:44 pm; edited 1 time in total

Mama Bear

Mon, May 03 2010, 5:44 pm

WOW. the last post on this thread, before it was resurrected, was written before I even became a mother! what a time warp!

MommyZ

Mon, May 03 2010, 5:45 pm

Mama Bear wrote:

WOW. the last post on this thread, before it was resurrected, was written before I even became a mother! what a time warp!

I became a mother Jan 2 2004. Smile

Inspired

Mon, May 03 2010, 5:56 pm

amother wrote:

Does he make ultimatums like that regarding everything in your life or is it only with babies?
I think most husbands are just more mature than that.
Babyhood is so short.

amother

Tue, May 04 2010, 5:51 am

no he doesnt make ultimatums for everything! he just thinks its gross to sleep with his wife and his kid. not that crazy of him. is very hard to keep getting up at night and put my baby back (dh says he w/d bring the baby to me, but I dont want to wake him- he gets up so early for minyan and I dont- so that never happened)
I just wonder what ev/o does- my dh cant be the only one who minds and we cant be the only ones who sleep together when we can (which has been almost my whole married life with pregnancy, nursing and having to be on a bc for a medical reason)

imamama

Tue, May 04 2010, 6:11 am

Quote:

he just thinks its gross to sleep with his wife and his kid.

???? If all you're doing is sleeping, why is that gross?

amother

Tue, May 04 2010, 6:20 am

I have told him that- but who am I to argue with his feelings? he feels it is strange. when someone feels a certain way there is no use in arguing, just accept how they feel.