Baby in Your Bed | Imamother

deedee

Sun, Sep 26 2004, 2:12 am

I did not like that story nor do I understand why it was posted.
I sleep with my baby! when she was just born I listened to everybody and put her in her crib cause I was also afraid I would roll on her. then I would lie in my bed and think of this tiny little baby was a part of my body for 9 mts now sleeping all alone in a big crib. I couldnt stand it. I took her to my full size bed and 7mts later she is still there!!! even now when I sleep by my mother on a twin bed I put her in the portacrib and I cant sleep cause she looks so lonely to me all by herself! I am also worried if she is breathing, when she is with me I am much more comfortable.
I know my husband is a roller and a heavy sleeper so he doesnt sleep with the baby.
my main concern now is her rolling out so I try to keep her between the wall and me. I am slowly trying to tranfer her to the crib but I think I'm having separation anxiety-any tips?!?!?

Pickle Lady

Sun, Sep 26 2004, 3:11 am

I sleep with my baby and its the reason I am not a zombie in those first months of my babies life. Also a side note... sleeping with your baby and breastfeeding your baby a few times at night CAN not always help with postponing ovulation.

I love sleeping with my babies, I like keeping them warm epecially in the winter.

miriam

Sun, Sep 26 2004, 1:17 pm

Hey deedee we are totally in the same boat LOL

I had her sleeping in her own bed for a few hours a night but somehow she has crept back in to being there all night. I love it but I dont think she needs to nurse 3-4 times a night ( I don't even know how many times she nurses b./c I am sleeping). I was able to trasfer my older daughter to her own bed when she was about 1 1/2 yrs old so it can happen.

imanut

Sun, Sep 26 2004, 8:35 pm

I sleep with my baby during the day b/c otherwise she won't nap but I don't sleep so well when she's with me, not b/c I'm afraid I'll roll over onto her, but b/c I worry since she has a tendencey to bury her face in the pillow/blanket/mattress. I do it b/c we both need the rest, but I feel she is safer in a bed meant for babies.

Nechama

Sun, Oct 03 2004, 4:31 am

It is nearly impossible to roll over onto your baby and smother him/her.
Don't believe me? Try it.
A baby has a natural reflex to lift their arms and legs when something is on it. Also babies can breathe out of smooshed noses (watch them nurse) by Heavenly Design.
Co sleeping means sleeping with children.
Babies have been designed by G-d to be practically break proof.
Even in the story brought down, the lesson was about Teshuva, not about smothering babies. Did the baby die of natural causes and the mother in her desperation and dismay blame herself?! Definitely possible. And even probable. Her REACTION was the point of the story.
I personally know of a mother who reacted to her son being burned (through NO fault of her own) by saying "What is this and what do I do?!" Does it mean SHE burned the child? No. Can we learn a lesson in her reaction? Yes.
Co sleeping is the way G-D intended us to sleep. Or He would have made our breasts detachable.

Liba

Sun, Oct 03 2004, 4:40 pm

Nechama wrote:

exactly!!

shayna

Tue, Oct 12 2004, 2:47 pm

I B"H have 7 healthy children from 2 1/2 months - 13 1/2yrs slept with all of them and never rolled on one thank G-D. Bad things happen sometimes and noone knows why. I for one did not like the story b/c nobody wants to hear such sad things when your a mother, I feel we hear and know enough about such sad things. After reading all the replies I felt you guys were attacking each other. This sight is about learning and sharing, not insulting. Everyone has the right to share a story if we don't like it we don't have to put one another down.

micki

Tue, Oct 12 2004, 10:45 pm

no side bars but I have a wall on one side and a co- sleeper on the other. so my babies have never fallen off. before I had the co- sleeper- ITS AMAZING!!! I was always worried and actuallly learned to nurse the other side without moving the baby's position of between me and the wall.
o I miss those snuggly days where the baby always somehow ends up snuggled up next to me...

Chanie

Wed, Oct 13 2004, 7:56 pm

In the prenatel classes before my son was born, the nurse talked a little about pple who chose to sleep with the baby in bed. On the topic of rolling over the baby, she asked how many of us in the room roll off the bed at night. Of course not a single one of us did. She stated that the same way our subconsious knows where the end of the bed is, so too it is aware of the baby sleeping with you in bed.
At the time I did not plan on having my child in bed with me, but because my son kept waking himself up in the bassinet (he kicked a lot and there isn't much room for that in those small things), I had to take him into my bed until he was old enough for a crib in another room.
The arrangemnt worked out beautiful and Baruch Hashem there was no incidence. In fact I would do it again with my next child, Im ertze hashem. I found it so much easier to nurse at night, and I found that it helped my son get use to sleeping through the night earlier (my breath slowing down in sleep relaxed him)

Rivka

Wed, Nov 17 2004, 7:06 pm

When I was in hospital after giving birth they gave me the baby to hold in my bed to comfort him, I fell asleep with him in the bed, when I woke up I asked why they let me sleep with the baby in bed as I could have rolled over and c"v something could have happened. The nurse told me that there is no cases of mothers rolling over their children unless on medication or ill because just as you know not to roll out of your bed you know your child is there and you won't roll on them. True I didn't move the whole time I was asleep.
Also I was told a baby should only sleep with one parent, do not put the baby between both parents coz that usually ends with disaster.

The story about the mother smothering her child was in bad taste. True it might have been this persons story, but did he say the story when asked about mothers sleeping with their children? I don't think so, he probably used it when explaining about teshuvah coz it really didn't explain anything else apart from that.

I don't see anything wrong with sleeping with baby when they are new born but not when they are older coz then it turns into a bad habit.
I had a moses basket next to my bed so I would put him to sleep in that and when he woke up to feed I would just have to roll over reach in his bed without getting up and feed him and then obviously fall asleep with him feeding.

ForeverYoung
Guest

Fri, Nov 19 2004, 2:12 am

w/ my 1st one, they scared the day lights out of me, so I put him on his back in his bassinette. He didn't sleep well, but it was O'k. My second one- a stubborn little girl w/ her own mind - taught me to put the babies to sleep on the tummy (& boy, did she sleep well!!) and co-sleep (as she nursed 24/7, I wouldn't have slept for a year otherwise). Now I just do what is right for the baby. I let them choose.

But for some reason Wink

, regardless of the age, they all LOVE my bed & even the baby nows when she's in it!!! 8)

curlyhead

Tue, Nov 23 2004, 4:28 am

my first I never had in my bed. I would sit up to nurse and stay up till he fell asleep. now that I have 2 ans don't have time to sleep during teh day it makes it alot easier to have my baby in my bed. I am still getiing used to it as my daugther is only 3 weeks old. I am always scared I'll roll over here. Once or twice I forgot she was there and rolled over and woke her up.
The problem is that means I nurse more on one side in the middle of the night.

ForeverYoung
Guest

Fri, Jan 07 2005, 12:04 pm

Today my baby wa napping in my bed. I hrard hre wake up - she was talking & sounded like she's annoyed at something (she wasn't crying).
I finished what I was doing & Went over to her. She managed to cover herself with my pillow and was completely under it, just little feet sticking out. Boy did I get scared!!!

I pulled the pillow off & I saw an annoyed 4mnth old, working hard w/ her fists, trying to get it off her. Her breathing was fine, and she was very happy to see me Smile

Which shows that babies are much sturdier than we think. Smile

I heard it many times:
"it's not a question of the baby, making it,
it's the question of the parents surviving the first 3 mnths" Wink

Pearl

Tue, Jan 18 2005, 10:29 am

with my first born I was too scared to have her in the bed with me. my second cried so much when she was 6 months old after she was ill, that I got exhausted from getting out of bed and comforting her. after 2 weeks of almost no sleep, I took her into bed with me, and she slept there till she was 4 years old...! then I was very pregnant with my third child, and wanted her to sleep in her own bed. now my baby sleeps with my in my bed, because I am too tired to get up to nurse him....we'll see when he will leave my bed...he doesn't seem to be in a hurry!