Next door Neighbor opened store in her house

Ema of 5

Tue, May 14 2013, 12:20 pm

Quote:

Op here
I'm pretty sure it's illegal here. I might be extremely private person but that's why I chose this street. I don't like to have a store next door to me. I used to have complete privacy. When I went to my yard or to get the mail I could just go with my robe on. Now it is a different story.

if this is your only complaint, then thats not really her problem. how YOU choose to dress when you go out of your house is YOUR choice. if a large family with a lot of boys moved in next door to you and you decided that you had to dress differently when you went out, would that be your neighbors problem? what if you had a neighbor with a lot of little kids who liked to play outside all the time, and you felt like you had to be more dressed when you went out, again that would be YOUR choice.
I agree that its very annoying and frustrating, and I totally get you about the quiet, but it just doesnt seem to me that its her problem. this seems to be your only complaint, which is really more of an inconvenience than anything else.

amother

Tue, May 14 2013, 12:35 pm

amother wrote:

If I complain to her than report her I will be looked at as a bad person because she will know and tell everybody that I was the one who reported her. I have to report it without her knowing that it is bothering me.

OP you seem to be one selfish spoiled crook!! Shame on you!! it's all about YOU and only YOU!!
You seem terribly worried about how you can protect your reputation without being looked as the bad guy, G-d forbid!! Without even giving it a second thought of how reporting your poor neighbor may affect her in so many aspects.

amother wrote:

I have to report it without her knowing [/b]that it is bothering me.

That is why you'd rather report her than risk talking with her first!! And that is why you haven't considered discussing it with the other neighbors either... So no one knows who's the devil behind this awful scheme!!

Shame on yourl!!

Merrymom

Tue, May 14 2013, 12:41 pm

amother wrote:

I have to report it without her knowing [/b]that it is bothering me.

I think amother is very busy today

Clarissa

Tue, May 14 2013, 12:55 pm

amother wrote:

I have to report it without her knowing [/b]that it is bothering me.

Hey amother, something tells me you're operating an illegal clothing business out of your house, huh?

You're abusing the amother feature by attacking anonymously. So shame on youR, too.

amother

Tue, May 14 2013, 1:09 pm

Clarissa wrote:

amother wrote:

I have to report it without her knowing [/b]that it is bothering me.

Hey amother, something tells me you're operating an illegal clothing business out of your house, huh?

You're abusing the amother feature by attacking anonymously. So shame on youR, too.

You are wrong Clarissa!! I am not operating any business nor anything illegal from my home.
I'm not attacking! I'm merely expressing my sincere frustration.
Oh yes 'anonymously' indeed... don't want to ruin my reputation as the bad guy!! Wink

amother

Tue, May 14 2013, 1:25 pm

eema of 3 wrote:

Quote:

A lifestyle change is enough of a complaint. She plain doesn't want it. The block is not zoned for businesses. It is obvious from the characteristic of the block.

I live in Monsey and in my part they will investigate homes based on anonymous calls. This has nothing to do with whether the owner is posting sales tax, income tax, unemployment tax etc. The store is open to the public hence it is a commercial enterprise in a residential neighborhood destroying someone's peaceful enjoyment of her property. They will turn a blind eye until the first complaint.

Inspectors respond to the complaints. They must.

OP I totally understand. I don't even have curtains on my window. I love my quiet street. I wouldn't talk to the neighbor first because them it will be obvious.

amother

Tue, May 14 2013, 1:29 pm

amother wrote:

I have to report it without her knowing [/b]that it is bothering me.

Someone already reported you and saved me the trouble Smile

I think we have found the neighbor

amother

Tue, May 14 2013, 1:59 pm

vintagebknyc wrote:

can someone explain why an amother wrote this?

"OP you seem to be one selfish spoiled crook!! "
Question

Regretfully I wrote it.
I sincerely regret for writing those strong words. It happened in a moment of rage, I guess. What's done is done, and I cannot erase those words now. Only the mods can. I stand by the rest of my post though!!

My sincere apologies to the OP and others who were offended by those harsh words.
I shouldn't have Crying

Dolly Welsh

Tue, May 14 2013, 2:14 pm

Put up a high hedge or fence as a visual privacy barrier and forget it. Also, you do not mention your husband's view. He will be taking the consequences of your action.

Don't you know most new businesses go out of business? Be patient. It will go away eventually.

Somebody must need this. Perhaps they are enjoying the socializing.

Put out chairs in the back of your house and enjoy the back yard where you will not be seen. Put a hammock there.

vintagebknyc

Tue, May 14 2013, 2:19 pm

amother wrote:

vintagebknyc wrote:

can someone explain why an amother wrote this?

"OP you seem to be one selfish spoiled crook!! "
Question

don't cry, just tell me why you called said person a crook. I don't understand.

amother

Tue, May 14 2013, 2:28 pm

vintagebknyc wrote:

amother wrote:

vintagebknyc wrote:

can someone explain why an amother wrote this?

"OP you seem to be one selfish spoiled crook!! "
Question

don't cry, just tell me why you called said person a crook. I don't understand.

Because it seemed (to me) that she chose to protect her good name on the account of a fellow Jew's blood.

Fox

Tue, May 14 2013, 3:17 pm

Clarissa wrote:

vintagebknyc wrote:

can someone explain why an amother wrote this?

"OP you seem to be one selfish spoiled crook!! "
Question

And why it got four likes? Who likes a post like that?

I think it reflects increasing frustration with the OP.

I just re-read the entire thread, and the same advice has emerged over and over:

1. Talk to the woman directly.
2. Talk to a rav or similar third party.
3. Take her to beis din.

These are the responsible, adult, halachic ways to handle the situation.

The OP, however, doesn't like these solutions because she wants to remain anonymous.

Frankly, I don't see that as a very realistic, mature, or commendable attitude.

When neighbors have problems with one another, they start by discussing the issue in a friendly, respectful manner. Only when that fails to resolve the problem do they enlist others, including various enforcement mechanisms.

The fact that the OP is unwilling to extend even this courtesy to her neighbor -- whatever the neighbor's offenses -- is, I suspect, beginning to make some of us lose patience with her complaints. In fact, perhaps someone should warn the woman with the possibly illegal store that she might want to move to a neighborhood where the people are nicer!

Clarissa

Tue, May 14 2013, 4:02 pm

amother wrote:

Clarissa wrote:

I prefer that people posting as amother not call me "honey." If you're going to take a tone with me, post as yourself or not at all.

Sorry - honey wasn't meant as derogatory at all! Unless you were just trying to change the subject! It's a term of endearment where I am from...

Oh. That makes me feel better. Thanks.

faigie

Tue, May 14 2013, 4:08 pm

I honestly do not understand why people are attacking the OP.
She invested good money into her house in a private residential area. She now has to deal with an illegal rental next door! This extra noise lowers the property value of her own home!
Let the rental person MOVE to to a legal store. There is NO excuse to blame the OP.

amother

Tue, May 14 2013, 4:34 pm

faigie wrote:

No one is blaming the OP for feeling the way she does.
She's rather being attacked for wanting to deal with it in a rather inappropriate (selfish) manner.
She was suggested several appropriate ways of dealing with her dilemma, but apparently she seems to rather protect her kavod.......